#galeophobia

psvr, and pcvr! solo developer, not meant to be fully realistic, nothing hurts you except drowning, i pet a moray eel on the head :3

i think its one of my favourite games ive bought, i played the demo instantly got hooked and i bought it full price the day after!

If they avoid the ocean for the rest of their life, then there is a good chance this fear just won't come up unless they go to an aquarium or something. If they live anywhere away from the coast, it's rarely going to be a problem. And, okay, shark week on television is very very bad, and they would rather watch basically anything other than Jaws, and they accidentally saw Finding Nemo without being warned about the sharks and still try to avoid thinking about it because it makes them want to crawl under a weighted blanket and not come out, but still. Not a major thing, most of the time. They live a basically normal life.

Except.

There's one...small...problem.

This person has a curse. They are cursed to be miserable, sometimes to the degree of suicidal ideation, because they absolutely will not, will not, will never, recognize themselves in the mirror without the scars from a shark bite. It's a weird curse. They hate it. They go for years trying to ignore it. They try various options to try and work around the curse but, no, only a real shark bite will do.

This person has literally had panic attacks about sharks. The mere thought of a shark tooth anywhere near them makes them want to throw up. They have had to hold themselves together every time a classmate in school did a project on sharks growing up, because they knew their fear was irrational, they knew they were the problem here.

But at the same time, they must get bitten by a shark or they will live with a different pain, the pain of always being subtly wrong, for the rest of their lives. They could live that way. It might be a healthier way to live, even. Getting bitten by a shark, even under the most controlled of circumstances, is still a risk. Most sane people cannot comprehend why they would want to do that to themselves, why they would put themselves through something like that, why they even have that psychological torment.

This is exactly what it's like to be trans, have dysphoria, and have a phobia of surgery and medical procedures.

It is insane that I have a phobia and am going to voluntarily have a medical procedure that I could theoretically live a normal and healthy life without. It is insane that I'm doing this because I've had gender dysphoria since puberty. I know I am making the right decision, that I'll endure a month's extreme discomfort in exchange for the rest of my life free from this particular source of psychic damage.

It's insane that, because phobias are somewhat irrational by nature, I cannot even express why I am doing any of this except by drawing on the equivalence-to-me of gender affirming surgery and shark bites. I hate, with every fiber of my being, that this is the best route forward. That I am going to give myself more ptsd - I'm still getting flashbacks about the hysterectomy - over something that about 50% of the population have no particular problems Just Dealing With.

I hate that I can't think my way out of this one, I've TRIED. I've tried, for so long, and it hasn't worked. I mean, I don't have an instant panic attack over needles anymore. I can (very uncomfortably) survive (most) routine medical procedures.

“Maybe I should have worn lipstick, too,” you pondered aloud. “What colors go with that shade of purple?” 

Shimazu chuckled. A clawed hand rested on your coccyx before coaxing you to kneel next to him. Now you were both genuflected in front of Vexacus’s “claspers.” Unlike a feral shark, the bounty hunter’s members protruded at all times. 

Especially when he had two eager mouths before him. 

Shimazu’s hand remained on your back, giving you gentle scratches before resting on your shoulder.