a (long awaited?) FriSatSun 20October2012
So I'm starting this post at 2:15am. I'm suppose to be sleeping but sometimes I just don't want to go to sleep even though I'll complain about my tiredness the next day. I have a weird life. I stay up until my sleepiness is unbearable and I'm forced to lay my head on my pillow to end the day. I'm not able to be alone with my thoughts... The fantasies, regrets, alternate scenarios that seem to formulate as I wait for sleep to sneak up upon me. I won't tolerate these things.
I'm sorry if this sounds negative but for some reason I find it so much easier to write from a negative point of view. In reality though I would love to just lay in bed before I fall asleep and be alone with my thoughts. Thoughts of what could have been in a world I cannot live. A place where I have an endless amount of courage and wise, in every sense, discernment. A place where everything is filled with rainbows and butterflies and awkward unicorns (;D)
Ahahah! I hope that last part sounds a bit more positive(: