#fortuga

Did we ever get a pirates au with Fortuga?

OLGA MY PRECIOUS PIZZA ROLL DON'T

You know...technically she COULD have survived that, maybe...?

There are ways. Nanomachines.

The MG Rays are having...a dance off?

Now SOLIDUS is surprised that Ocelot might have betrayed him. Even though you...hired him...to betray people...

"Stupid machines!" says the guy who is like, 80% stupid machine.

Fortune, FIX OLGA RIGHT NOW FIX HER

Fortune gonna fuck up the Patriots! GO BBY GO.

Mom's making fun of Ocelot. I'm okay with that.

I like that this game actually worked the fact that they ripped off MGS1 into the plot. It's kind of beautiful.

Also, HOW THE FUCK does Ocelot kill Fortune?

Oh, right. Nanomachines.

I'LL FIX THIS I CAN FIX THIS FORTUNE

Wait, what happened to Vamp? Is he still alive?

Liquid sounds SO EXCITED. "Brothers!" They're gonna have a fuckin' FAMILY COOKOUT, man.

So Rose...probably wasn't real? So much for Snake's "don't be weird man you're girlfriend is real" thing. Well, she's real, but not necessarily his girlfriend I guess.

Man, Solidus is a REAL DICK.

Snake, no one wants a philosophy lesson right now, Did Otacon teach you all this Matrix-ass bullshit?

Well, Snake's HD ass is a good note to end this on.

Wait Rose, get the fuck out of here. Weren't you just sniping Raiden emotionally about how he was just a tool and a weapon and you hate his guts?

Like, what the fuck am I supposed to believe is holding/has held Raiden and Rose's relationship together? All the insight into their relationship is how it was strained and collapsing under the weight of Raiden's suppressed trauma and Rose's guilt at setting him up to be a mindless weapon. So after all the boogaloo, why the FUCK would they decide to stick together and get married?

All I want right now is an AU where Fortune and Olga survive and bust out Sunny, and they get to be happy moms together. Well, depressed and traumatized moms who support each other. Freaky uncle-grandpa Vamp can come too, since I'm like, 95% sure he didn't die.

Raiden can go live with Snake and Otacon. They can all hash out their identity issues and family trauma together. Olga occasionally calls up and reminds Raiden that if he so much as THINKS about putting himself in danger until they can sever Sunny's nanomachine connection, she's going to shoot his dick off. Snake makes Raiden wear a helmet when he goes outside.

Well, okay!

Thanks for the weirdly emotional pep-talk, Snake.

"New Species will rule this planet." Did Otacon get you in on his alien conspiracy bullshit, Snake?

Well, at least now I can go ahead and play MGS3 and kick the crap out of Ocelot and Big Boss.