#fizz rambles

Mike being forced to give up parts of his childhood (both literally and figuratively) early in the show and continually having his feelings belittled:

He still cares about his toys, this part of his childhood, and wants to keep them, but he has his emotions belittled by both of his parents.

We know Mike still has a lot of childish whimsy in season 1:

But by season 3 he has internalized a lot of what both his parents and society has taught him. Being childish and nerdy is punishable and easily taken away. Maybe, maybe, if he's a little cooler, he won't be so bullied.

Mike and Lucas bond over having girlfriends, being more “grown up”, while Dustin goes off to science camp (unapologetically nerdy) and Will is trying to right himself after all that’s happened to him.

Mike is trying to grow up here, and trying to do it in the only way he knows how, getting a girlfriend and adhering to some sort of normal.

I fully believe it wasn't Mike's intention to hurt Will here. He just doesn't want the blame ("It's not my fault", see also: "Why am I the bad guy?") for doing the best he can do, essentially, survive. High school is looming over them at this point. He can't go into high school as a kid.

Here, what he thinks he's doing, albeit misguidedly, is guiding the party. He's trying to make sure they stay on some sort of normalcy-track, because the more they grow up the weirder their interests are.

But then, in season 4, he’s still in Hawkins but he has the chance for a fresh start. He sees an opportunity to do the things he loves and cares about:

(He doesn't say anything about how they'll totally be too old to play DnD when Will comes back. He does nothing to discourage Will thinking that they might.)

and not be ostracised for it, or at the very least be “cooler” about not fitting in.

Mike does want to fit in, and in Hellfire he gets a chance to be under the wing of Eddie, someone charismatic who he admires. Hellfire are undoubtedly outcasts, but they're cool about it. They have matching shirts. They have a reason. They outcasts because they're better. He's outside the ecosystem of highscool, but inside the ecosystem of Hellfire Club.

And then he comes to Lenora, and both he and el are trying SO hard but it all comes crashing down,

and when he tries to confide in her, be vulnerable, this happens:

Apparently, Mike doesn’t understand what it’s like to be different. to want so badly to be normal but know you, aren't. Can’t be.

And then El disappears, and he and Will are finally friends again. And Will says this, after Mike is once again blamed for something that isn't really his fault:

He validates Mike's feelings. And he's genuine about it. And Mike can tell.