#first version

Month Two: Sacred Ground

The Magistrate’s lack of answers did nothing to settle the already hostile state of Kathryn’s stomach. Something needed to be done, and soon. She couldn’t bear the thought of losing Kes, not like this. Reflecting on the information Neelix had provided, she decided that, like King Nevad, she refused to accept Kes’ ‘death sleep’. The pressure of her epiphany caused the waves of nausea to crest and crash into her with full force.

Flying out from behind her desk, she barely made it to the sink basin before reliving, what appeared to be, everything she had eaten since being stranded in the Delta Quadrant. She could make out the sound of an override code being entered into her Ready Room door.

“Kathryn?”

The deep timber of her first officer’s voice traveled over the sound of her retching in the small private bathroom.

The warmth of his hands seeped through the layers of clothing as he massaged at her lower back and gathered the loosened hair out of the way. Tears stung at her eyes as the gagging slowly subsided. She was gently guided back into the room and gently deposited on her couch. She felt bereft during his momentary distance as he replicated a glass of water.

“Have you been to see the Doctor? I know he’s busy with Kes, but I’m been worried about you.”

Kathryn sighed into the glass, taking an experimental drink, and shook her head. He lowered himself onto the couch close to her. She leaned into his space and he brought an arm around her shoulders and pulled her body to his. His hand massaged at the muscles of her arm; her eyes slipped closed.

“There has to be a way, Chakotay. These monks, their body has an immunity. Somehow, this ‘ritual’ changes the chemical makeup of--,” she stopped short as bile began to rise in her throat once more.

Two strong arms hauled her to her feet and practically carried her back to the bathroom. He grimaced as her dry heaving turned to exhausted moans of pain. His concern skyrocketed as he felt the racing of her pulse beneath the tender skin of her wrist.

“I have to help her. Beam to the planet, gather data for the Doctor to find a cure for Kes. I’m going--,” his hand on her chin halted her train of thought.

“Kathryn! You can barely stand. Let alone experience the rigors of a spiritual journey. Exactly what is it that you hope to accomplish?”      

Her features grew hard and the ‘Captain’ resurfaced. She pushed her way from his embrace and staggered back to sit at her desk.

“If you’re asking whether I expect to speak to the Ancestral Spirits—no, of course not. But, something happens to the monks when they go through the ritual, something that allows them to enter the biogenic field, and I intend to find out exactly what that is. It might provide clues to a treatment.”

A small painful burp caused her to grimace. He gave a deep sigh and moved to sit across from her, his hands folded tensely in his lap. He knew that point of attempting to talk her out of the decision was moot.

“We’ll have to find a way for the Doctor to monitor your physical condition, and you should have a way to call for an emergency beam-out if you need it, as a precaution,” he added the final thought to appease the tiresome look she gave him.

“We just don’t have any idea of what the ritual entails. And if you’re already ill, I don’t feel comfortable sending you down there.”

She rolled her eyes and he noted the small wince she gave, as the gesture must have intensified her dizziness. Kathryn pursed her lips and pinched the bridge of her nose.

“I know that you are concerned for my well-being, and frankly, I’m a bit apprehensive myself. But, we’re running out of time. Test of endurance or not, I need that information. Whatever the explanation may be, spiritual, scientific, or otherwise; that does not matter. Right now, a member of my crew is dying.”

Their gaze was locked in an intense battle of the wills. A page to her combadge interrupted their standoff.

“Bridge to the Captain.”

“Go ahead, Ensign.”

“The magistrate has informed us that the council has approved your request to perform the ritual. You are expected on the surface at sunset.”

“Thank you. Please inform the Doctor that I will require his expertise.”

“Aye, Captain.”

“Janeway out.”

Chakotay could not hide the trepidation that sunk like a rock in the pit of his stomach. Kathryn looked horrible, and he had a feeling she was only going to get worse.

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_

“Everything seems to be working. The subdermal bioprobe will transmit any changes in your biochemistry. It also acts as a homing beacon, if you are in need of assistance, simply treat it as a combadge and you will be beamed out.”

Kathryn could only nod her head in assent, fatigue had seeped into her bones. She did her best to mask her discomfort, not about to give Chakotay any reason to keep her in sickbay. Although, she’d give anything to have the room stop spinning.

“Thank you. Here’s hoping that I uncover some answers,” she stood slowly from the biobed and cleared her throat.

“One to beam to the surface.”

And with that, she disappeared.

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_

“Her respiration and pulse have remained steady. But, there’s been a gradual buildup of lactic acid in her extensor muscles over the last hour. And here,” he paused, examining the readout, “something else that the sensors haven’t quite deciphered yet.”

Chakotay followed closely as the EMH adjusted the settings and sensitivity of the probe. The Doctor’s slowly widening eyes elevated his blood pressure.

“What does that mean? Is she in danger?”

“N-not at all. She’s probably experiencing some light strain. What you’d expect in an endurance ritual. The troubling discovery here are the clearly elevated levels of hCG present in the captain’s body. How could I have missed this?”

“Is that something that would suggest a treatment for Kes?”

Chakotay, again, trailed in the Doctor’s wake as he shakily sat down behind his desk shaking his head; suddenly engrossed in his computer screen.

“Not…exactly.”

The intimidating look that Chakotay pinned the hologram with could have vaporized a Klingon warrior in an instant.  

“I don’t suppose you’d settle for: ‘Doctor/Patient confidentiality’?”

The Commander’s continued silence answered the question for him.

“Alright. Well, if you must know. It appears that the captain is pregnant. According to these readings, conception took place approximately...eight and a half weeks ago.”

Both men froze as their minds raced back in time; Chakotay numbly braced himself on the edge of the desk.

“New Earth,” the commander’s whisper confirmed the Doctor’s speculations.

“Yes. Of course. When the Captain returns, I’d better check on the rest of your inoculations. The both of you. Who knows what else that virus rendered inactive. I believe ‘congratulations’ are in order then, Commander,” he attempted a small smile to assuage some of the obvious terror radiating from his commanding officer.

“Are the stresses she’s experiencing going to put her or the pregnancy at risk?”

The Doctor paused, formulating the correct phrasing to approach him with.

“Would I have allowed her to go down to the planet had I been aware she was pregnant? Probably not. Could I have stopped her? Most certainly not. Will she be in danger? Only time can tell. All we can do is wait and hope that she uncovers something to help Kes. I would hate for all of this to be for naught,” Chakotay sank down to sit on the edge of the desk. The Doctor’s words fading in and out of focus.

Pregnant. In about seven months, they would have a baby. If she came back from this. If nothing happened after that. What about when the baby was born? What if there were an attack? A kidnapping?

Suddenly, the image of an alien race holding the captain’s child for ransom sprung into his mind. He already worried enough about Kathryn. He didn’t think his heart could take it. The Delta Quadrant was a horrible place. Who was he to bring a child into this hostile environment?

A flashing tricorder brought Chakotay back to the present. The EMH was practically shouting in his face.

“Commander! There you are! I was sure that I had lost you,” he continued to run the sensor over his body, “Get some rest. Breathe a little deeper. And just take things one step at a time. I will keep you privy to the Captain’s condition.”

Chakotay shot the Doctor a withering glance and the hologram raised his hands in apology.

“I am relieving you of duty. I will page you, should anything change,” the Commander sighed and mumbled something as he passed the EMH and headed through the doors.

­­*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

“Commander Chakotay, you are needed in sickbay.”

Tuvok’s voice over the combadge snapped him out of his sleep. Still on his couch, report in hand, Chakotay cleared his throat and tapped at his chest.

“On my way. Chakotay out.”

­­­*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_

He paced back and forth, his rage barely containable. The Doctor knew for certain the reason for his behavior, all the while Tuvok raised an inquisitive eyebrow at his First Officer’s unprofessional behavior.

“It’s been three days since she had any sleep! How long are we going to let her go through this?”

Chakotay turned to the Vulcan, intense eyes demanding an answer. Not receiving one, the Doctor reluctantly cut in.

“I understand your concern, Commander. But the fact is that her vital signs are stable. She seems to be in no immediate danger,” the EMH shrunk back into his seat as Chakotay leaned over the console, face set in a deadly glare.

“She’s been poisoned with some unknown toxin. It may be having an effect that we can’t gauge. It could lie dormant for a few days and then suddenly fluctuate and kill her in minutes,” Tuvok took an immediate step back as Chakotay hurled the padd that he had been holding across the room.

“It is possible that some of the Commander’s concern may be justified. Is there anything which might be preventing her from using the homing signal in her implant?”

The security officer did his best to renationalize the extreme emotions that were radiating from his distressed colleague.  

“Not that I am aware of. She’s fully conscious. If she wanted to transport, she could signal us. I am not about to pull the Captain out unless I am absolutely sure that she is in danger. I am getting some remarkable data. This amino acid is occurring due to the breakdown of the toxin in her bloodstream. I believe this is it. What we’ve been searching for,” the Doctor spoke mostly to Tuvok, finding it difficult to concentrate under Chakotay’s intense glare.

“So, does this mean that you can form a cure for Kes from this data alone,” the Commander stepped closer into the hologram’s space.

“I strongly suspect that this biochemical change is going to give us the answers we need,” a tense pause fell over the men. Tuvok examined the situation and then broke the silence.

“Commander, it is ultimately your decision. However, I believe it would be the Captain’s desire to complete the ritual.”

Chakotay shook his head and grumbled.

“Alright. We’ll leave her there for now. But I’m not moving from this monitor until she gets back.”

With a nod of assent, Tuvok exited the room. Stern eyes turned on the EMH.

“Will the toxin kill the fetus,” exhaustion and a hint of sadness creeped into Chakotay’s voice.

Both men stared blankly at the readouts on the screen.

“As of now, I cannot provide you with an answer. But, I assure you. She is in no distress; and I will do a full and complete workup when she returns to the ship.”

The Doctor turned to see a figure quickly moving out the door.

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_

Chakotay sprinted down the corridor as he slid to a stop in front of the sickbay doors. They opened, only to reveal Kathryn clutching a basin, moaning through a horrible episode of dry heaves.

“Damn it, Kathryn!”

He rushed to her side as the EMH appeared with a series of hyposprays. After what seemed to be hours, Kathryn weakly brought her face up to meet her Commander’s.

“Hey there. The Doctor informed me that I’m going to need some extra space in my quarters soon,” the attempt at humor was thinly veiled as her smirk quickly morphed into trembling sorrow.

Chakotay took the basin from her and gathered her shaking body into his arms. He whispered comforts to her and gently rocked back and forth as she sobbed into his chest. The Doctor finished his tests and silently affirmed that everything was alright.

He slowly brought his lips to her forehead, resting them there, waiting for her breathing to return to normal.

“When will he begin treating Kes,” she rested heavily against him as her words slurred together.

“Almost immediately. The toxin was the key. You made it through for her. Kes will be alright. And…our baby will be alright.”

He felt her stiffen slightly with his last assuring statement. Fatigue winning out, she relaxed into him once more.

“You need food, water, and rest. I’m going to take you to my quarters to watch over you tonight, and I won’t take ‘no’ for an answer,” she sighed and wrapped her arms around his neck.

“You’ll get no argument from me,” her voice muffled by the material of his uniform, “I just want my stomach to stop churning.”

“I can give you something to relieve the nausea. It won’t rid you entirely of it, although it will make life more bearable. A diet change would be wise, but we will save that discussion for your follow up appointment,” the Doctor pressed one final hypospray to her neck before returning to his office.

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

Chakotay had almost succeeded in coaxing Kathryn to bed when her combadge called her to sickbay. As luck would have it, Tuvok paged him to the Bridge, before he could follow her down the corridor.  

Sensors were detecting a fluctuation in the energy signature that they had studied from the altar down on the planet. Damn. What did it all mean? Why couldn’t anything be simple here in the Delta Quadrant?

He had asked that question once at a senior staff meeting. Kathryn’s dancing eyes had met his and she sprung from her seat, clasping him on the shoulder.  

“Now, where would the fun be in that,” her singsong reply brought laughter to the whole table.

His reverie was interrupted by the lack of Kathryn Janeway as he entered sickbay.

“Where is she and why hasn’t Kes’ condition changed?”

The EMH swiftly moved back and forth around the biobed. Doing his best not to be disrupted by the irritated man that had just entered the room.

“The treatment is not having the desired effect. I’m not quite sure where the Captain has gone, I have been working on altering the toxin and attempting a second procedure.”

Chakotay had strode out the door before the Doctor could finish his report.

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_

He had been on nearly every deck. The mess hall, back to the Bridge, back to their quarters; she was nowhere to be found.

“Janeway to Chakotay.”

“Captain we’ve been worried about you.”

“I’m all right. I want you to beam Kes down here to the sanctuary.”

“Kathryn, what are you doing?”

“Chakotay, please. Just do it. That’s an order.”

“Acknowledged. I’ll bring her down myself. Chakotay to Sickbay. Doctor, prepare Kes for transport.”

“Understood.”

An unshakable feeling of uneasiness settled over Chakotay. Whatever happened, he just prayed to the Spirits to protect them all.

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*

“The Doctor says that her life signs are deteriorating, he almost wouldn’t let us out of Sickbay. Kathryn, what are you going to do?”

She wouldn’t look him in the eye. The uneasiness intensified.

“Kath-, “she held up a hand to stop him.

“I’m taking her back into the biogenic field,” Chakotay’s heart sank.

“Why,” Neelix pled.

“I believe it will save her life,” all of Kathryn’s focus remained on Kes.

“Kathryn…you’ve been through a lit in the past few days--,” he wished she would just look him in the eyes.

“I know what I’m doing.”

“Are you sure of that? There are 800 megajoules of energy running through that field. There’s no telling what would happen if you went through it. Take some time to think about this and we’ll run a few more scans,” with that she looked right at him.

“No.”

She pushed past him to get to Kes. All he could do was stand by and watch as the mother of his child carried Kes’ lifeless body up to the shrine.

Sending up silent prayers of protection, he held his breath as a surge of energy burst around the two women. His body was ready to sprint at a moment’s notice, when he heard Kathryn calling to Kes.

Neelix and Chakotay both let out a sigh of relief as Kes’ small reply floated across the cave. Chakotay met them at the bottom of the steps and carried Kes the rest of the way to the bed.

“Chakotay to the Doctor, beam up Kes and Neelix.”

“Yes, Commander.”

Chakotay waited for the transport to complete before turning back to Kathryn, who looked ready to collapse at any second. He caught her just as she went down and pulled her up against his chest. Her breathing was slow and even, no immediate concern there.

“Chakotay to Voyager. Two to beam directly to the Captain’s quarters.”

“Aye, sir.”

*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_*_

She stirred as they approached her bed. He laid her down and sat next to her hip. Weary eyes followed his movements as he slipped the sandals from her feet.

“What—I, never mind. I’m far too tired to have this conversation tonight,” he sighed and hung his head in defeat. He turned to see tears rolling down Kathryn’s pale face.

“I can’t do this, Chakotay. I’m not ready for this. How do I even--? What if something were to--,” he silenced her with a chaste kiss to the lips.

Standing and removing his boots, he climbed into the bed beside her. She instantly molded to his side and he cradled her there.

“I had all of the same doubts and fears. Someone told me to ‘get some rest, breathe a little deeper, and take things one step at a time’. I found it to be sound advice. I say we take it and discuss things when you’re feeling better,” she sighed at the feeling of a tender kiss being dropped on the top of her head.

“Chakotay?”

“Hmmm?”

“I-I love you.”

He smiled and squeezed her a bit tighter.