My teacher kept asking me if I was okay, and sending me emails with assignments and class requirements. I thought they just forgot to take me off the list.

At the end of the semester, I received my schedule for the finals and I saw that I was still listed for the class.

In a complete panic I went to sit in on the final, not wanting to fail the class completely, yet not having any idea about the material.

Of course I failed the final and the class and my teacher offered to drop me from the course, even though it normally wasn’t allowed. I was hugely relieved, but she said she would have to require that I take it and pass it next year. I said that was fine.

To start off, I am a person who loves to learn and I have to have more time on a subject because most times I don't understand or it just doesn't click to me.

I understand the importance of education but my issue is how it is being delivered and taught to people.

In high school I was an a-b honor roll student and sometimes I struggles and other times I excelled. When I graduated, everyone and society told us that "college is your next step, you have to go through college if you want to be successful" and that's what I thought so I immediately went to college.

Everyone hypes it up so much, so I thought it was gonna be just like high school and it would be fun. At first when I was learning and doing my work I thought it was cool until I started failing and I thought "hey I'm just struggling and it's gonna blow over" but it didn't! At this time, I was going through family issues. Still if I said something, they would probably say "sorry but homework is still due"

It kept continuing! Then I had to worry about financial issues and how I was going to stay at the college... they don't tell you about how much you will stress in college about money or having good grades in your classes...

after I kept failing I was on probation and I tried changing my major from radiology to art and psychology which was great for me bc I love art... I thought again it was going to get better,  I even started seeing my school therapist because I seriously needed a therapist but... it wasn't working... the school therapist wasn't working... she didn't help me nor did my situation get better.

I was doing great in my drawings classes but in graphic design and history and other classes, I was doing terrible! Again here we go, I was failing and so was my love for learning, mental health and my self esteem and confidence.

I was on suspension at this point and I legit did not know why this was happening to me! I wondered why my roommate who slacks off the most, watches Netflix all the time and does other stuff continues to get straight a's in their classes while i am trying and continues to fail no matter what I do....

I honestly think our American education is a joke, a waste of time, and a waste of money. Yes I understand why we need college but what am I supposed to do when I and so many other people feel so uninterested in core and other classes....

if I fail or do not get/understand something the teachers and other people think I'm stupid, lazy, and/or there is something wrong with me. I'm at a community College right now and some of it is happening again... sad part is that amid all these things going on... I thought about doing the unthinkable... and still to this day... which is devastating but... after years and years of dealing with this stuff it starts to take a toll on you

why does school teach us things to remember and pass tests to be ready for the real world? when we graduate we either don't remember or it doesn't apply to our daily lives.

I've been watching so much videos about how school is making us lack critical thinking, creativity and other stuff  and how we waste our lives, our mental health, and money for a piece of paper that tells us what kind of title I have. Not to mention the debt that are gifted to us...

I honestly feel like a dollar sign and not a student or young adult who is trying to get to get dream job and learn and go through life at the same time.

Why not teach us something useful like how to change a tire, fill out taxes, how to build credit or something and anything that we can use in the real world.... in some videos other countries are doing better than us in education related stuff, they even have better benefits like free college, free school supplies like textbooks and other stuff. 

Instead wht I've seen so far is money hungry people (some) who don't care about us and just want students to do it no matter what it takes! Why can't it be better? Why can't it benefit students and our health at the same time? Why can't college be free? Or our text books? Think about my story and about all the other students who have to go through this.

Another thing is that when I was in my first year of college... 2 people on my residential floor dropped out in the first year. It could have been anything but my question still stands... why? Why should we suffer? Why can't we learn from other countries? And help our students actually learn....

It’s always best to be honest with your parents. Honesty is the best policy. This isn’t a saying without reasons. I guarantee you there is no easy way to tell your parents that you’ve failed two subjects. They’re going to be disappointed. They’re going to be angry. They’re going to be sad. They’re going to have whatever emotions they have and that’s okay. It doesn’t negate that you tried hard. It doesn’t negate that you gave it your best. That’s the key. 

I think the best thing to do right now is to be honest with your parents. Let them know that you tried your best. You asked for assistance from your professor and you just didn’t understand enough. It’s okay. We’re not born geniuses for a reason. We have our strengths and weaknesses. Talk to them about what was really hard for you when you took this subject. Talk to them about how you can help yourself succeed more in the next course. Maybe you were too busy working that you couldn’t devote the needed time to studying. Maybe you didn’t reach out for help soon enough. Make plans for yourself on how you can succeed. This will help you and it will help ease your parents’ mind. 

It’s going to suck and you’re going to be sad but remember what I said. Nothing they feel negate how hard you tried. It doesn’t make you a failure. You did your best and that’s good enough. If you didn’t do your best, you can do better. You can help yourself. It isn’t the end of the world. You are capable to creating a change in yourself. 

Always by your side,

I wonder how long the smell of a new book lasts.

I should buy fifty to test it.

This tea is nice, but I need coffee

Wait. doesn’t coffee have too much caffeine?

Maybe I’ll just add a little more sugar in my tea

Yes, that’ll help me start the day.

This book is really good

Like, really good.

I should focus more so I can catch all the details.

Crap. I read the whole page trying to focus and now I don’t know what happend. 

Oh well, better start the whole chapter over again.

Will there be a pop quiz tomorrow? 

I hope not.

I better read my notes over.

Ugh this is so boring.

Oh well, I guess I’ll just fail the class.

This idea for a fanfiction is great.

I should type it up before I lose the idea.

Nevermind, my laptop is too far.

Hey, it’s getting late, I better go to sleep.

But the fanfics.

They’re so good. 

I can’t leave them.