Work in progress, but I will hopefully finish it later this week!
Idea that after touching the apple in brotherhood, Desmond AND Lucy are teleported back. Lucy struggles with telling Desmond about her being a Templar or not because now they were technically free so did he really need to know? She ends up being the one reluctant to go back to the present though Desmond isn’t much better. He “accidentally” immediately starts flirting back once Ezio starts.
Ezio gets to play sugar daddy to Desmond and Claudia ambushes Lucy to train her and yuri happens.
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Ubisoft broke my game and so I made it Constantinople's problem
Ok so I was replaying Assassin's Creed: Revelations and now I'm actively losing my goddamn mind (as expected.)
Not because it's a bad game.
Not because it's sad.
But because UBISOFT BROKE THEIR OWN GAME and just said "oops lol" and walked away like we wouldn't notice that they LOBOTOMIZED THE STORYLINE MID-SENTENCE.
Let me explain.
AC: Brotherhood ends with Desmond just straight up ganking Lucy (rip girl but also WHAT) and collapsing into a coma.
Ok. Cool. Fine. I'm traumatized but following.
He wakes up on Animus Island and here, Desmond meets Clay (sweet memory ghost, digital son, Clay Kaczmarek I love you) who is like:
"Hey bro :) Your mind is literally mashed potatoes. You need to finish Ezio's memories, finish Altair's memories. Get a Synch Nexus and also REMEMBER YOUR OWN LIFE or you're gonna dissolve into digital soup like me lol."
Cool. Awesome. Love the stakes. That sounds like a story arc, BUT HERE'S THE THING.
You can't.
YOU LITERALLY CANNOT.
Mechanically? Sure. To reach a Synch Nexus and beat the game, all Desmond needs to do is finish the Altair and Ezio memory sequences. That's it. That's what the game tracks.
BUT NARRATIVELY? Emotionally? Psychologically? The Synch Nexus is also about Desmond remembering who he is. That's what the Desmond's Journey gates are for.
They're not just bonus missions. They're literal memory obelisks meant to ground Desmond in his own identity. His past, his sense of self, and all the trauma he never got to process.
Ubisoft built that structure—then torched the damn bridge.
So Clay is like:
"Go relive your own memories or your brain will liquefy."
And Ubisoft said: "Lol no. Eat glass."
Because if you're playing AC:Revelations post 2024, post multiplayer removal era, then congrats! When you try to walk into those big glowing obelisk gates that holds Desmond's memories, you know what happens?
You get the black loading screen of death. Forever.
It's not a bug. It's not a fluke. It's the direct result of Ubisoft gutting the multiplayer component of their damn game without fixing the single player fallout and what did that multiplayer contain?
The GODDAMN UNLOCK TRIGGERS FOR DESMOND'S JOURNEY.
And instead of, you know, patching the damn thing, they just… moved on.
Built ships in Black Flag.
Let Ezio flirt with librarians.
All while Desmond's character development is now LOCKED FOREVER BEHIND THEIR INCOMPETENCE.
The cure is canonically in the game but physically inaccessible AND THEY NEVER FUCKING FIXED IT. You walk into Desmond's memory gates and the Animus SHOVES A PILLOW OVER YOUR FACE FOREVER.
So naturally, I lost my goddamn mind.
You can collect all the Animus fragments you want. Go ahead. 100% it.
But it will mean NOTHING.
Just that same black screen. Forever.
Because there IS NO CONTENT.
No cutscene.
NO CLOSURE.
Hope you like staring into the void, loser.
And that's when this happened:
And of course I FUCKING SPIRALED BECAUSE IMAGINE RIGHT—
Desmond tries to fix himself—tries to follow Clay's advice, reclaim his mind, but instead, the moment he tries to walk into his own memory gates on Animus island…he gets stuck.
Just like your game.
And Desmond wakes up in Constantinople, YEARS BEFORE AC: Revelations starts.
The Animus bugs.
Memory code collapses.
Everything breaks.
Like, he HARD CRASHES there like a corrupted .exe file thrown through a portal.
No shoes. Dissociating. Bleeding effect cranked up to 100.
And he thinks he's still in the Animus.
But it never does.
Because the city smells too real. The ground's too cold.
People are speaking Turkish which he doesn't understand a LICK of and so Desmond just curls up in an alley and waits for the loading screen to finish.
Because this isn't the Animus.
This is 1506, bitch. There is no patch coming.
His soul is literally buffering and no one understands him because English hasn't even hit this part of the world yet. He's rocking on the ground like a feral alley pigeon, muttering in six languages that sounds like utter gibberish and confused whether he’s Desmond or Ezio or Altair right now.
He's literally some feral, barefoot man.
And he's so, so dangerous.
Because he's got Altair's instincts, Ezio's technique, and the mental clarity of a browser with 40+ tabs open with 3 playing music.
He doesn't beg like a beggar the locals assume he is, so people avoid him. They think he's cursed.
Except. EXCEPT—
ENTER KEMAL:
Random retired master assassin with a bad leg, a pigeon coop, and a "fuck around and find out" attitude. He finds Desmond after the guy stabs three Templars in an alley with a broken blade (because somewhere in the fog of his mind, that still feels right).
And Kemal's like:
"This one's fucked, but he's got claws. Let's fix that."
And he just TAKES DESMOND IN (because of course he does.)
He treats Desmond like an injured pigeon he found in a ditch. Ties him to the furniture so he doesn't dive out the window. Feeds him lentils laced with sleepy herbs because otherwise he bites people.
And the Brotherhood is like, "Who is this??"
And Desmond?
Desmond acts like a cornered pigeon.
He growls. He hides under furniture. He chews through rope.
He's not house-trained. He's animus-trained. (Good luck with that.)
And Kemal shrugs like:
"He recited Surah Ad-Duhaa in Latin, bit a man, and then stabbed a Templar. I'm keeping him."
Fast forward FIVE YEARS:
Desmond is now the unhinged mascot of the Constantinople Assassins
He's always barefoot
His tunic is never on right
He's also terrifyingly good at killing people and worryingly creative at making bombs because in his broken mind, making a martini and making a molotov are functionally identical: measure, shake, serve, pray it doesn't explode. (And honestly? Bartending and bomb crafting was essentially the same skillset.)
He brings his self-proclaimed big brother Yusuf shiny trash like a magpie
He glares at mirrors
And everyone in the Brotherhood is so proud of him. They’ve spent years getting Desmond stable(ish). Teaching him how to exist without twitching at shadows. How to talk with his own voice and not a long-dead ghost.
They're proud. They're protective. They're freaking smug about their little murder pigeon.
AND THEN—
AND THEN Ezio Auditore da Firenze sails into town and oh, that's when it ALL UNRAVELS because Ezio sees Desmond and just stops like he's been hit with a brick. His brain lights up like a haunted cathedral.
That name—Desmond—has been rotting and echoing in the corners of his mind since the Vault, and suddenly the ghost is real. Breathing. Right there.
And so Ezio gets absolutely obsessed. Not in an entirely healthy way but like in a "mine now" but make it Italian with unresolved prophecy trauma sort of way.
Meanwhile, Desmond? He sees Ezio and FREEZES. Like, his whole body goes still and he LOCKS IN on Ezio like a compass snapping north because his mind is like "I KNOW THAT GUY" and so what does he do? He starts following Ezio. Just appearing in alleyways. On rooftops. In Ezio’s peripheral vision like a glitch that might bite.
And Yusuf? Yusuf looks from Ezio to Desmond and goes ABSOLUTELY NOT.
Because Desmond is THEIR FERAL PIGEON. And Ezio? Ezio’s looking a little too interested for their liking.
Feral Older Brother Mode™ activated.
Actually—scratch that.
The entire Constantinople Brotherhood is now in Feral Older Brother Mode.
Yusuf: "You can talk to him, Auditore, but if you touch him, we will throw you in the Bosporus."
Ezio: "I wasn't gonna—"
Yusef: "You were."
Constantinople Assassins: "We saw your face." "Stand down."
AND THE INSANITY CONTINUES because Desmond never flinches from Ezio. He leans in because the closer Desmond stays to Ezio, the more mentally stable he gets. Because subconsciously, he's reliving Ezio's memories the old-fashioned way. IRL. In real time. Like a really dedicated LARPer with severe dissociation and trauma. Like, Desmond is RE-SYNCING by following Ezio through the game narrative.
And Ezio starts really seeing Desmond. Not just the mismatch of instincts or the haunted stares, but the man underneath. The one held together by twitchy nerves and too many memories that aren’t his.
So Ezio starts asking questions. Real ones.
Gentle ones. Casual ones. The kind you ask on rooftops during stakeouts or over shared dinners at sunset.
And dude, that's probably what Desmond NEEDED for him to start remembering who he is. Not a mission. Not a Piece of Eden. But for someone to reach BACK and remind him there's still a "Desmond" underneath the bleeding effect.
So Ezio becomes the fucking sledgehammer and breaks them open himself.
The Animus failed him.
Ubisoft fumbled the bag.
The game doesn't let Desmond open his memory gates.
LMAO so yeah.
That's my AU. That's the freakshow.
A EziDes romance featuring:
Desmond "Pigeon with a Kill Count" Miles
Feral. Territorial. Makes unbroken eye contact while bomb making
Once "accidentally" bombed the corner of a market because someone called Ezio handsome
Steals Ezio's heart and then his throwing knives
Sometimes forgets Ezio is real and not just a vision from his fractured brain, and honestly? Same
Ezio "Kinda Into This" Auditore da Firenze
Sees a man who looks like prophecy and chaos made a baby, hears "Desmond", and immediately short circuits
has never been this confused or this turned on by a man making eye contact while crafting bombs out of wine bottles
Thinks he's being courted (he is)
Yusuf "You Touch Him, You Die" Tazim
Unlocked "big brother murderbird" DLC
Refers to Desmond as "my bird" and once threw a man off a roof for trying to flirt with him
Every time Ezio talks to Desmond, Yusuf unsheathes a knife. Ezio has stopped noticing. It's a courtship ritual now.
Kemal "Retired Assassin Turned Bird Dad"
Found Desmond in a rain gutter and imprinted on him like a duck
Said "not my problem" and then proceeded to make it entirely his problem
Has "I raised that bird with my own hands" pigeon dad energy
Desmond bit someone today? That's his baby. Good job, son.
Emotionally retired but physically ready to brawl
And me. Spiraling. Again. Into Ezio/Desmond hell.
This is not a slow burn.
This is a slow pecking.
A ConfusedEagle!Ezio and FeralPigeon!Desmond courtship full of glances and weird gifts and staring too long from rooftops.
Now excuse me while I go spiral in peace. I spent the last three hours thinking about this when I should have been working on my WIP and it's all Ubisoft's fault.
If you made it this far through my unhinged fantasy, thank you so much. You are now legally part of my Constantinople Brotherhood.
Go forth. Protect the pigeon. Bring him lentils and knives.
May your bombs be stable, your pigeons bitey, and your Ezios confused.
You know the gist, Desmond dies and travels back in time to AC 2, around Ezio's first years as an assassin -- let's say the 2 (i think) years that he trains with Mario. Desmond is like "fuck it" and decides to chill with the occasional murder of an unsuspecting asshole of a templar. I am partial to the idea that he's a lone mercenary of some kind, touring italia and the more unknown for him places (Milan, Verona, Naples) and successfully NOT involving himself with any assassins.
And then Ezio actually starts his career and is getting a lil' famous, mostly among his own allies and enemies.
It starts out simple, a little predictably even: Desmond is back in Florence, fully confident that Ezio is not around at the moment, hiding his familiar features from courtesans, thieves and mercenaries alike, when some guards spot him, maybe bump into him and fly into a rage. While chasing him, Desmond sees that a certain someone hasn't taken off his wanted posters or paid off the town criers.
Some mercenaries in Forli mistake him for Ezio, some courtesans give him winks with different meanings and even the thieves stay mostly away.
Things are not so fun for Ezio. A weapons merchant visits Monteriggioni and greets Ezio like an old friend, Caterina's friend -- a politician from Milan -- quietly thanks him for some shady favour, and a few foreign women starting work at la Rosa Colta are especially friendly and attached. What the hell.
As the years go on, it gets worse. Desmond doesn't get anything from the assassin tombs, but Ezio can tell that someone has been there before him and RECENTLY. A few of Mario's new men that haven't had a good look at the young master yet have been spilling nice, but untrue rumours. And when Desmond decides to finally visit Venice about a month before Ezio? Well, Rosa reaching for the wrong pocket wasn't noticeable, Antonio commenting on how "slow he's gotten" is weird, but Leonardo asking him how he is liking a book that he's never even heard of? That does it.
"Seriously, amico, what the hell?!"
"Um, Ezio, did I speak out of turn or something?"
"No, merely being the hundreth person making me worry about either a secret twin or a worrying sleep-walking habit!!"
It doesn't help that Desmond paid Rome a visit over a decade before Ezio.
It's not his fault he didn't really recognize the bratty but impressive teenager he spent an afternoon teaching how to properly climb. It's not his fault that he had an insignificant but profound impact on the kid, and it's not his fault that Machiavelli is acting weirdly respectful and familiar towards Ezio!!
"But, Noodly, horror of horrors, wouldn't they know his name, and thus GASP Ezio would have already heard Desmond's name in a confusing context at least once in his life!!" Why, yes. In comes Minerva as the final piece of the puzzle.
Not too long after Monteriggioni's fall, Ezio spots a tall, strong, fast, tan-skinned man with a scarred lip eyeing a blacksmith's shop Ezio was about to invest in. Ezio, in all his ashy and bloody glory, fresh from burning a Borgia tower goes up to this stranger, grabs him by the shoulders and asks him in the most calm voice on earth:
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This fic has tempted me to draw a quick speedpaint of Desmond Miles with wings. The face may not be quite right but the third game fails at that too lmao.
If you love Desmond and haven't read this fic yet, please go read and give the author some love in the comments.
https://archiveofourown.org/works/62960971
Quote
The chamber was still and quiet.
The air was thick with incense that drifted high towards the vaulted ceiling. Stone walls and woven tapestries covered the flooring, swallowing all sound.
At the center of it all, he laid in a reliquary of silks and iron.
The angel. The Vatican's holy relic.
He had not stirred in two years. His wings were draped over the silk sheets, half-unfurled. His feathers around the edges flickered gold in the candlelight. His face was serene and his breathing was soft—each rise and fall of his chest the only sound against the quiet of the sanctum.
