#evil!jeff

The autonurse warbled a warning as his patient's heart rate increased, and Fawn checked the wrist he'd just finished wrapping. "Five?" Pulse and respiration were both spiking and he had no idea why. "Five?" He asked again.

Turquoise eyes snapped into being. "Cloud!" Five called, totally ignoring Fawn.

Yes, Five? "I can't reach EOS. Can you?"

Fawn blinked, he had no idea who Eos was or how… wait a minute, the implants!

I - I cannot, Five.

Five swore in several languages for a moment. "Can you let me in? We might be able to contact her together." There was a very long pause of several seconds from the AI. If Colonel White gives permission, yes. I will ask him. "What the bloody hell are you two talking about?" Fawn demanded.

The laser sharp blue gaze flicked to Fawn, assessed him for a moment, and narrowed. "EOS is my partner, she was hiding Five Actual, and I can't raise her." "So the implants are a communication setup?" Fawn was both horrified and intrigued.

"Only as a tertiary benefit."

The Colonel has agreed, provided there is no 'snooping'.

"You know I won't, Cloud." Confirmed, but that is the Colonel's condition.

"Then tell him I agree." Five settled back. "Don't interfere,” was directed at Fawn, “I've never tried this with anyone but EOS." He closed his eyes and stilled. The autonurse shrilled as Five's heart rate and breathing all plunged: heart rate into the 30s and his breathing slowed to 8 per minute.

Kirimiko silenced the alarms and looked at Fawn, startled. "I've never seen anyone drop into a meditative state that fast before."

"I haven't either." Fawn looked up at the ceiling, his eyebrows pulled together in thought. He could ask Cloud what was going on, but if the AI was helping with whatever this was, he didn't want to distract him. He gave himself a small shake. "We monitor for now. Unless he starts to crash or the base does, we leave them alone."

“S.I.G.”

0-0-0

‘Fear is the mind killer, I will face my fear.’

Linking with EOS was as second nature as breathing, how she saw reality was a wonderland that John could easily get lost in; colours had tastes, words had texture, emotions were like smelling spices.

Finding and linking with Cloud required much more effort. He was Spectrum and his defences were formidable, not that John wanted to try to force his way past them, but making a 'door' for John to enter through was taking time. It was nearly two minutes before John felt a shift in the proverbial wall before him and he synced with Cloud. Linking with Cloud was just as much of a wonderland, but in a completely different way: it was like being inside a crystal, all planes and angles, with images and reflections going on forever. But it was also bright, comfortable and safe. The last time John had felt this safe was all those months back, in the New Haven puppy pile. 

(Cloud?) [Hello, Five. Can you show me where EOS should be?]

(I can.) John looked for the 'image' that read as 'Cloud', found it and sent their plan to him. It was remarkably like being with EOS, but it didn't have the feeling of oneness he got with her. Cloud was someone he was talking to, not someone he was sharing his mind with.  

It felt like several centuries passed before Cloud spoke again. [I have found her, but I cannot reach her. If I show you, can you link to her?]

(I should be able to.) John steadied himself before reaching out to touch the image in front of him. But he paused. (Is there room in your servers for her?)

[Yes. We planned for this contingency. She did not share that with you?]

John's chuckle was rueful. (No, she didn't. But she doesn't tell me everything.) [That seems - inefficient.]

(Oh, it probably is, but it's how we work.) John reached into the image and found himself flung to something that seemed like the space between galaxies, empty and dark. (EOS?)

There was a very small shimmer. ((john!))

John 'stretched' to reach her, to be the bridge between Five Actual and Cloudbase, but was stopped by something. (Cloud? What's blocking us?)) [I am unsure. But the magnetic resonance seems - off.]

John twisted his lips. (I was worried about that.) He thought back to the fantasy stories he'd enjoyed as a child, books where science didn't matter. (Do you think we could make a 'crack' in the magnetic field? One big enough for her to slip through?)

Cloud was quiet while he ran the calculations and tested them against his communications array. [It is possible, but I am unsure of the outcome.]

Which was a huge red flag, but John was a Tracy and a Thunderbird, the impossible was always optional. (Then we try anyway. If it doesn't work, we can fall back and regroup for another attempt.)

[Understood.]

John took a deep breath out of habit, he didn't need to breathe here. (Right, I'll be the point of the lance, you be the force behind me. A precision strike should give us the opening we need.) He sent that to EOS and hoped it’d get through to her.

[Understood. Are you ready?] (Yes, let's do this.) John pictured a spear made of math and starlight and pointed it at the tiny speck. (Now!)

The world bent around them as John made an ally out of physics and used the laws of nature and science to find the loopholes and expand that fuzzy area between what was possible and impossible. The barrier between them stretched as the lance head pressed against it, but it held firm for seconds that stretched out into eternities until, finally, it broke and there was a sudden rush as EOS surged through the gap and used the lance like a compass needle to find her way back to him.

John caught her and passed her to Cloud as fast as he could. His brain and nervous system was not meant to hold exabytes of code for very long. Cloud gathered him up as well, and John sat up gasping in Spectrum’s medical bay.

Fawn and the nurse were gaping at him. “Holy Hell man, what did you do?”

John sucked down air as fast as his lungs would let him. “W-what I h-had to.” He collapsed back on the bed, even at his lowest point before, he hadn’t been this tired.

“I’m not even going to wait for your bloods. Kirimiko, rehydration and nutrient IVs, one in each arm.” Fawn pinned John in place with a sharp gaze. “Argue about this with me, and I will sedate you.”

John was too tired to do more than just nod. (EOS?)

((I’m here, John.))

Warmth surrounded him and he relaxed further into the bed, but that made him notice how his entire body ached. Much more than his rough landing. (I think I’m going to pass out now. Behave and be nice) ((I will, John.)) The warmth returned but with the sharp smell of black pepper - chargin. ((You were right.)) (The human is good, the human is wise, trust the human.) ((Yes, John.)) Pausing in scribbling out his notes, Fawn was bewildered by the small smile on Five’s face as his eyelids fluttered shut and he fell asleep.

T H U N D E R F A L L 

In the back of the Spectrum helicopter, Virgil was laid out on the stretcher, well buckled in with a thick blanket covering him from the neck down aside from the arm left poking out for the IV that Cobalt was putting into the crook of his elbow. Scarlet was setting up the bag of 10% glucose, Magenta was with them too and also in a jump seat, having changed helicopters to make room for MAX, and Dosela was squeezed in beside Magenta.

They’d all recognised the signs of Scott needing to take care of his brother and without a word they’d either gotten out of the way or made themselves useful.

When the bag was hung on a hook by Virgil’s head and the running line was clear of bubbles, Scarlet got himself into a nearby jump seat too so Cobalt had as big a work area as possible so he could tend to his brother.

“Hey, Scott, I’ll be okay,” Virgil tried to tell Cobalt, only to get pinned by the raised eyebrow that all the captains had picked up from Colonel White, the one that so elegantly uttered a dry ‘oh really now?’ without even saying a word. Virgil frowned in response. “I said I’ll be okay, not that I am okay, I’m not trying to do a you this time, honest.”

That got a crack in Cobalt’s mask, a blink and you miss it one, but a crack all the same. He finished connecting the running line to the IV port, then placed his hand in Virgil’s and gave it a little squeeze before sitting cross-legged on the floor beside the stretcher, still holding Vigil’s hand and giving no indication that he had any intention of letting go.

It was very much against regulations, but no one had the heart to tell Scott to leave his brother’s side to go buckle in.

Then all of the captains’ epaulettes flickered with the warning of an incoming message. They listened, grim faced, then Scarlet swore a heartfelt ‘bloody hell’, immediately leaning over to Cobalt and putting a hand on his shoulder.

“What is it?” Virgil demanded, his eyes going between the men. 

“Beacon activation, at the Manor,” Scarlet told him and Dosela. “Alan, Miss Kayo and Lady Penelope’s beacons have all gone off.”

“We can’t get there in time,” Magenta grimaced, “the choppers don’t have the range or the speed, but local officers are responding now.”

Cobalt took in a slow, shuddering breath, and let it out just as slowly. “One thing at a time. But it’s Penny, Kayo, and Parker, they are more than capable.” Magenta had a humourless grin. “Don’t forget the Madman.”

“Trust me, I’m very aware that Alan is there.” Cobalt’s voice was flat.

Vigil tugged on the hand holding his. “Hey. It’s the Squirt. He’s got the Tracy luck by the bucketful. The asteroid mission? The orbital mine? Halley’s Comet? We’re the ones that got the grey hairs, not him.”

Cobalt nodded. “What about Five?” He looked to his brothers in arms.

“Last we heard from Cloudbase was that he was coming in literally hot. Green said that he had to take the jump early,” Blue answered.

“Early?” Dosela glanced at the others. “How early? The last he told us it was going to be from the Stratosphere.” Scarlet figuratively stepped up, in actuality he stayed buckled in. “I decided to keep that from you Cobalt. You didn’t need the extra stress.” The glare sent Scarlet’s way promised lots of pain in Scarlet’s future. A very tiny smile played on the corners of Scarlet’s mouth, one that said ‘bring it’. “Report said the Mesosphere, and he was hot enough to make steam on the flight deck. Medical said minor injuries only.”

Cobalt nodded. “Will someone relay that to Xanthic?”

Magenta nodded and turned to speak quietly into his mike. “This might help you both as well,” Scarlet offered, “Destiny, Rhapsody, and Symphony are also inbound to the Manor.”

That did get a little of the tension out of Cobalt’s neck and shoulders, and by extension out of Virgil’s face too as he responded to the shift in his brother’s emotions. “Good.” Cobalt gave the needed context to Virgil and Dosela with a wry smile and a quick “They’re scary.” He turned back to Scarlet. “Did Green say who was responding to the Manor? I, uh, blanked a little.”

That was totally understandable.

“Gold,” Scarlet supplied. “ETA of twenty.”

A dangerous expression briefly crossed Cobalt’s face. “We trained with her. If there’s anyone left after the others get through with them they’re not going to be a problem for long.”

“One hour twenty-three to Cloudbase,” Blue called back from the cockpit, “They’re coming to meet us part way. Green’s promised updates as soon as he has them.”

“S.I.G.” Cobalt nodded, both of his hands holding Virgil’s now as he absently started to rub little circles on the back of Virgil’s hand with his thumbs, an action designed to soothe himself as much as it soothed Virgil. The grim fact of the matter was that all they could do right now was wait. Wait, hope, and trust in their friends.

Sally had insisted that he be transferred to a local hospital when Jeff had first told her that Scott would have to stay in hospital for several weeks just to be on the safe side. She’d been horrified that Jeff would consider burying Lucy without Scott in attendance, but he had reasoned with her that they would all benefit from putting events behind them and that the funeral home couldn’t hold the bodies forever.

Senna had offered her services but Jeff had politely thanked her, paid her until the end of April and dismissed her. She’d taken what had happened very hard, had admired Lucy so very much, but really Senna understood where he was coming from, even if she’d miss the family terribly.

So the small family of six followed the carriage through the streets and then the coffins into the church. All were dressed in black suits brought especially for the occasion.

The gathered townsfolk, too upset at what had happened to be annoyed that they’d been pushed out of the church in favour of Jeff Tracy’s more prominent friends, quietly whispered at just how well behaved all the children were, how sad that the baby would grow up without any knowledge of his mother…

Other comments were said about the missing child, but only by those who were sure they would not be overheard.

Everyone agreed that it was one of the most moving services they had ever attended.

~

Sally hadn’t gone home at all since the doomed holiday and she had no intention of abandoning her grandsons now, but the farm also needed managing. The wheat was only a couple of months off being harvested and as one of the biggest farms in the district she had staff to take care of.

So with some reluctance once the funeral was over Sally took a week out to organise everything. She debated taking all the boys with her, but in the end decided to take only Alan, the baby needing more hands-on time than her other boys.

She’d insisted that Jeff take some time off his company to care for the other boys and he’d reluctantly agreed. Sally had (slightly tartly) suggested that he should have delayed sacking Senna until after the boys had returned to school, but Jeff – never one to admit he might not have thought this through as well as he’d meant to – remained adamant that he could cope with three children without her for a couple of weeks.

Before she left Sally ensured that there was enough food to feed twice that number, ready-to-cook meals provided by many of their neighbours and friends. But her heart sank as she left them with their father. Despite everything Jeff promised Sally knew that if she didn’t stay on top of him he could easily slide back into neglecting them as he did Scott.

Scott. Scott was uppermost in her mind.

She visited every day, even when she returned to the farm, and had taken John most often to see him when she’d been with Jeff, the hospital refusing to allow the younger children to visit. She’d only been able to take Alan because he was dependent on her.

Being back in Kansas was helping but it was John and Alan who was able to get through to their eldest brother. He’d been too ill for several days after the accident to really take in what had happened, but once the doctors had been happy that he was strong enough to be flown home Sally and John had sat with him and held him as he was told.

The black depression that had settled on Scott once he’d been installed into the hospital worried Sally deeply but seeing the effect John and Alan had on him gave her hope that once he was cleared to come home his brothers would see to it that Scott would have something to live for.

It took the whole two weeks for Sally to organise the running of the farm how Grant would have wanted. Thankfully her husband had always been a considerate and forward-thinking man and had left a workable plan for if the worse should happen. Sally knew she could sell the farm if she wanted to, that Grant wouldn’t have minded, but she’d had so many happy times here that she couldn’t bring herself to sell it. Fred Daniel, Grant’s right-hand man, had accepted the offer to move into the farm and become manager and with one last look behind Sally said goodbye to the Tracy Farm.

Two weeks after Sally moved in permanently Scott came home. Tests after tests after tests had comforted her that Scott would suffer no lasting effects from the accident. Physically at least. Sally wasn’t so sure about the mental and emotional effects…

But Scott surprised everyone.

From the moment he walked back into the house it was as if Scott was the same boy he’d been a month ago. He immediately began looking after his brothers like a pro. John perked up with Scott home. Virgil began to come out of the shellshock he’d been in since the avalanche. Gordon began to smile again.

Alan continued to thrive with the attention of everyone.

With Scott back Jeff began to spend more and more time at his office and his business. And he tapped into contacts he’d made both before the funeral and during it. Contracts began to flow, aeroplanes – both whole and parts of – began to be commissioned in earnest and Tracy Aerospace as was began to take off internationally as Tracy Industries as Jeff expanded into fuels and commercial crafts rather than the military contracts he’d concentrated on up to now.

In the midst of all this Scott began to look seriously at college courses. He’d expected that…that his Mom had ensured that there had been a college fund but nothing had been said. He knew that the will had been read before he’d been released from hospital but Jeff had ignored all the dropped hints.

So one night just before the end of the school year Scott took courage from a hug from John and a deep, deep breath, and knocked on his Dad’s study.

And waited. And waited.

He resisted the urge to knock again, knowing that that would just rile his father further and Scott really, really needed his Father to be amenable today….

He waited.

‘Come.’

And Scott entered.

The desk in Jeff’s study was huge. It was the finest imported rosewood, with a blood-red calf-leather insert. There were three drawers on each side and one in the middle, and there was gold inlaid on both the leather and outlining the edges of the desk itself.

It was larger than his parent’s double bed, and always made Scott feel small. It made him feel even smaller now.

Especially as he was made to wait.

Finally Jeff looked up, raised an eyebrow and put his stylus down.

‘Scott. What can I do for you?’ ‘Dad, it’s nearly the end of the school year. My teachers have been asking me if I’m going to college next year. I…’ ‘Next year? When you’re fifteen?’ ‘Well…yes.’ ‘Do they think you’re clever enough to attend?’ ‘Dad, I’ve been doing Yale University courses for the last year, as has John. Both of us have been approached about going next year, me to Yale and John to Harvard. I – I thought you knew…’ ‘I knew about John. I didn’t even know you wanted to go to college. You never spoke to me about it.’ ‘Mom…Mom knew.’ ‘Well I wish she’d said something before…it’s out of the question right now, Scott.’ ‘Wha – what do you mean?’ ‘There’s no money for you to go to college yet, every spare coin I have has already been earmarked for expanding the business, and I can’t just magic that kind of money. I’m sorry Scott but the answer is no, not this year and it’s unlikely to be next year.’

Scott stood frozen for a moment. He was sure his heartbeat was loud enough to be heard from the roof where he knew John was waiting.

‘What if…what if I can pay my own way?’

Jeff scoffed. And then froze. And then pinched his nose.

‘Not this year, Scott. But if you can get the money together to pay for yourself next year I will not stand in your way. However, you will need to make sure that your brothers are cared for. Particularly Alan. I’m relying on you to care for him now, especially now your Mom has gone.’

And Jeff picked up his stylus and carried on working, not even looking up when Scott left. Not until the door closed quietly did Jeff stop what he was doing, deleting what he’d written and sitting back.

He cursed quietly and unlocked the left-hand drawer, pulling out an official-looking envelope. Inside was Lucy’s will, containing a clause putting Gran Roca in an iron-clad trust for Scott.

Miles had tried everything legal (and, knowing the man as well as Jeff did, probably some illegal routes too) to break the trust, but all to no avail, and he had all but suggested Jeff burn it, but there was something satisfying about having it here and still having control over that bastard. The trust fund wouldn’t become Scott’s until he was 21, so Jeff had some years to play with.

It helped that no one else knew the fund or the will existed. Jeff had made sure he was the only one present when the will had been read. It had been easy to ensure, with Scott the only recipient and still in hospital. Jeff had been surprised that Lucy hadn’t looked after all her children, he supposed that she’d relied on him for that, but Lucy had been right to look after Scott.

It wasn’t like Jeff was prepared to humour the bastard.

He spun the envelope around in his hands before coming to a decision and, opening the drawer more fully, Jeff activated the secret panel and hid the envelope in there. Out of sight but certainly not out of mind, not until he could get his hands on the Ranch at any rate.

Smiling now, Jeff returned to the contract in hand, crossed several paragraphs through that favoured the current owners instead of himself, and rewarded himself with a shot of Macallan 50.

All thoughts of the Scott problem had already been pushed to the back of his mind as unimportant and irrelevant.

John waited a couple of hours for Scott to join him on the roof but his brother never materialised. He assumed that the discussion with their Father had not gone well, but he had hoped Scott would come and talk to him. Still, if Scott didn’t want to talk about it then he wouldn’t. So John stayed looking at the stars until he couldn’t stay awake anymore and made his way to the kitchen to grab a glass of water before bed.

He found Scott at the kitchen table, asleep and surrounded by leaflets. Scott woke as John sat down, and came awake as John taught him.

That night was long, but by the time dawn broke over the farm Scott had already improved his initial investment enough to already be able to afford Yale and a house. And John had set up an ironclad alter-ego that suited his big brother down to the ground.

One that he knew their father would never be able to trace.

Scott never spoke to his father again about college but John did.

That very next morning Jeff called John in to finish signing the paperwork that would see John become the youngest ever students of Harvard University. He was in high spirits. That new contract would be signed today and propel Jeff Tracy into the multi-millionaire league.

‘Morning, Son.’ ‘Dad. What’s up?’ ‘I thought it would be a good time to finish the paperwork to send you to Harvard. How does it feel to be the youngest ever student?’ ‘No.’ ‘I beg your pardon?’ ‘No, Dad. I don’t want to go next year.’ ‘You don’t. Does this have anything to do with Scott?’ ‘No, Sir. I’ve been researching into the other youngest students and they all suffered as they struggled to adapt. I – I know I can do it but I want to give myself more of an opportunity to not struggle unnecessarily. You know I’m not good with people, Dad. I think I will benefit from a delayed start. Next year. I’ll still be the youngest student, but I’ll be much better prepared. Sir.’

Jeff sat back and contemplated his son. He knew that Scott was the real reason but he also couldn’t fault John’s reasoning. His brightest son found it notoriously difficult with people he didn’t know, and his request was not unreasonable.

‘I will agree only on the understanding that you will still attend your extra classes and I want a proposal on my desk by the weekend as to what you’re going to do to counteract this issue you’ve raised.’ ‘Yes, Sir.’ ‘Good.’

True to his word at the end of the week John delivered a 5,000-word masterpiece on how he was going to cope with being at Harvard. Jeff was impressed, his solutions were innovative and, as befit a Tracy, John was facing his problems head on and not hiding from them.

That was Friday. Saturdays were movie day.

John and Virgil prepped the popcorn and the room while Gordon picked the movie – Finding Nemo had been permanently deleted from the list of films to choose, and at some point soon so would The Little Mermaid – and Scott had Alan. Jeff, as usual, was nowhere to be found, although his car was in the driveway still so they assumed he was in his office.

Cars was Gordon’s next favourite, and truth be told they all enjoyed that particular one, but to everyone’s surprise the six-year-old had opted for one of Scott’s favourite movies and their eldest brother arrived in the room with Alan curled into his chest to the strains of the Top Gun overture.

Carefully settling down so he didn’t wake his baby brother, Scott grinned as Gordon goofed around the room, gyrating his hips ridiculously to the music. Virgil joined in when he and John arrived, and John took his place at Scott’s right as always.

As the movie started proper Virgil settled on Scott’s left and Gordon at Scott’s feet, and despite the clowning around earlier they watched the movie through without comments.

They did pause twice for toilet breaks and more popcorn. Once Virgil and Gordon had left for the bathroom John leaned against Scott and in turn Scott put his arm around his shoulders.

‘Ok?’ ‘Yeah, Scott. I’m good.’ ‘Did Dad agree?’ ‘He did.’ ‘Wow. I’m surprised.’ ‘I put forward a really good case.’ ‘So we have a year?’ ‘We have a year. Scott…I know you haven’t thought of this, but I think we should talk to Grandma. If we’re leaving Alan at only eighteen months we’re going to need her onboard.’ ‘Yeah, yeah you’re right.’

Scott absentmindedly kissed Alan’s forehead. The baby squirmed a little but stayed asleep, and Scott’s arm tightened around him, and John had a startling realisation.

Maybe Scott didn’t want to go to college next year…

‘Scott?’ ‘Yeah, John?’ ‘Do – do you want to leave it another year before we go?’ ‘What do you mean?’ ‘You and I can leave next year, but Alan will only be seventeen months. I know that Virgil can take care of him and Gordon but…’ ‘Yeah…it’s a big but…’ ‘You can’t put your life on hold for us, Scott. Not even for Alan. It’s not fair…’

Scott snorted, startling Alan and his brother screwed up his face but before he could do more than let out a quiet wail Scott was gently jigging him and the wail turned into a gurgle and then a giggle.

Alan reached up and clumsily grabbed at Scott’s nose, and with a grin Scott leant down to make it easier for him, until he was rubbing his nose over Alan’s and the tot wasn’t the only one laughing in delight as Gordon and Virgil returned.

The movie was restarted as everyone retook their places, and Scott leaned a little towards John.

‘Life may not be fair, but I have you all. And Alan has us. An additional year would be good. I’ll be sixteen, you’ll be eleven. Virgil will be ten, Gordon eight. Alan will be two and a half. Grandma will be here and you and I will visit as often as college allows. What do you think, John?’ ‘I think we are lucky to have you. Two years to college then. I can live with that.’ ‘Can your big brain manage waiting another year?’

John softly laughed. Scott grinned.

‘Yeah. I’ll manage. Will you?’ ‘What more could I need?’

It was always flashing on about one thing or another. Dropping blood sugar levels, mild dehydration, muscle strains. Rescue work was hard, If the boy couldn't cope with a bit of tiredness then maybe he wasn't cut out for this organisation. They had all gotten soft under Scott's watch. The alert pinged up again, this time with a shade more orange in the mix. It was swept away again, with a growl. He was annoyed that the Housekeeper programme was seemingly set up to tell him about every hangnail his operatives got. Another prime example of Scott's mismanagement. 

Before the system  could manufacture another biometric alert, Jeff pulled up a command panel on the holo interface and did the coding equivalent of popping the hood to get a look at the engine. Shoving aside strings of code he slapped a crude sticking plaster over the med-scan alerts before flicking the window aside. 

That should silence it and let him focus on more important matters.

Far up above Tracy island, in the sealed safety of Thunderbird fives Comms sphere John was trying to work out what had set eos into such an ungodly rage. He didn't think he had done anything to warrant this level of anger recently, but one could never be sure.

“And the absolute barbarian just mutilated a perfectly elegant line of code. Have you seen what He did?!” Lines of code scrolled past at a speed that made John's eyes ache. He had to look away, rubbing a hand over his eyes momentarily. 

“I'm sorry, who did what Eos?” He was feeling a little groggy, the cat naps were out of sync and worry had been making his ration packs taste like ash, it was starting to chip away at his edges.

“HE did, HE put this ugly patch in my system.”

The scrolling slowed and now John could spot the offending article.

“What system is this?” John squinted at the line, unable to confidently identify it in isolation. It was blocking notifications, but of what?

“It's the bio readings alerts from Virgil's suit.” She replied primly.

“He's silenced the medical warnings!?” his mouth open in shock.

“Yes, and in such an ugly way.” eos continued.

John let his head drop into his hands, running his fingers through his slightly too long, slightly too greasy hair. His space station might be advanced but keeping clean in space became more of a battle the longer you were up there and that was before you factored in rationing to limit the amount of supply runs needed.

“I'm less concerned with the elegance of his code,” he tried to get a hold on the rising emotions before they became misdirected, but the tethers felt frayed like old rope. “What about Virgil?” he ground out as levelly as he could manage.

“But John, it's not as if we were relying on HIM to watch over Virgil's welfare. I have of course already rerouted all medical alerts to myself and Mrs Travy via some rather elegant code that the blundering oaf will never find. I just find it incredibly rude that he has put that crude mess within my systems. What if someone saw it and thought it was mine!”

A laugh bubbled up in John's throat, breaking the tension. 

“You're right, it shouldn't come as a surprise to me that Sir is unconcerned about Virgil's wellbeing, that much has been obvious for long enough already. Thank you for rerouting the commands and looking out for all of us. I'm afraid you will have to keep the patch though, since he thinks you're just a scheduling system, you can't be seen to be self fixing.”

“I know John” said eos with the closest thing to an audible pout. “But I just needed to tell someone.”

“I know, and for what it's worth, I agree, it's very ugly. And nobody who knew you would think for a second that it was yours.”

“Thank you John.” her colours softened and John felt the lack of a hug like a physical thing, deep between his ribs. 

Back down on Tracy Island Virgil has ditched his uniform, with it's snitching sensors, and was asleep before his head hit the pillow, letting sleep repair some of the day's wear.

The flight over to the nearest airport was not too long and Jeff had managed to convince Scott to stay in his seat by promising that he could sit in the cockpit as long as in turn Scott promised not to touch anything. He didn’t touch anything as he promptly fell asleep ten minutes into the journey and woke up just as they landed.

Lucy, John and Virgil were waiting at the airport for them, and Jeff wasted no time getting them onboard and turning around to head back home, happy to have the cockpit to himself, spent the time trying to decide the best way to discuss Scott’s broken collarbone.

He’d not come up with a plan by the time they arrived, so he decided to wait until Lucy said something.

Scott’s joy at seeing his Mom and brothers again pulled at Lucy’s heart and she decided that she’d not leave him alone again. The sling, the way her eldest was holding himself, spoke of something happening in her absence, and the fact that Jeff hadn’t said anything spoke volumes…volumes of something she wasn’t quite sure of but didn’t like.

As the boys went willingly to bed she thought about the man she’d married.

Over the last year or so, since she’d fallen pregnant with John, little things she’d seen had caused a worry to begin to gnaw at her. Lucy had paid special attention to how Jeff interacted with his other boys, had noticed the difference in how he treated Scott but he’d promised to take care of Scott while they were gone.

Yawning widely had been the only thing that stopped Scott talking, and Lucy took the opportunity to check out his injury.

‘What happened to your arm, Scott?’

Yawn ‘Dad and I were playing ball when I missed catching it.’

‘Oh dear, that’s not good. What happened?’

‘My arm hurt and my shoulder, so Daddy took me to the clinic.’

‘What did they say?’

‘That I broke my caric…clarnic…collarbone and I needed to keep this sling on until it gets better. Did…did I do something wrong?’

‘No, Scotty. You didn’t do anything wrong, it was an accident. Why would you say that?’

‘Dunno.’

Unsure of the sudden hesitation in Scott’s voice, Lucy kissed his forehead and carefully tucked him in.

‘Now you need to promise me that you will do as you were told so that you heal fully.’

‘Yes Mum.’

Scott yawned again and sighed, eyelids dropping as Lucy bestowed another kiss. He burrowed slightly into the bed and Lucy smiled broadly, leaving him to sleep. As she turned the light off her son’s voice froze her in the doorway.

‘And the policeman was very nice. But Daddy said I needed to set a better example for my brothers.’

When she turned around Scott was asleep.

Nostrils flaring, Lucy stomped down the stairs and into the study where Jeff was working as usual.

Jeff watched in awe as Lucy launched into him. Not many people stood up to him, there weren’t many he’d let stand up to him…she was magnificent. He let her rant for a while until he couldn’t take it any longer.

Standing and coming around the desk Jeff pulled her close, ignoring her fists hitting him, and kissed her soundly. 

Eventually they broke apart. Lucy blinked, trying hard to process what was happening, but Jeff was grinning, and before she could really decide how to react he’s swept her up into a bridal hold and carried her from the room.

They settled down into a routine.

For next three years Jeff’s work with NASA meant he spent five months on the moon, with two weeks either side for isolation, and the rest of the time he spent building up his business, his time divided between their farmhouse and a warehouse with an office in town.

He employed two engineers-come-designers and while he knew they were good he still asked Lucy regularly to look over designs. Often she contributed ideas herself, spending time in the dining room where she could spread the paper over the huge table to give her room.

There were times Jeff would come home from the office to find Lucy deep in the designing zone, Virgil drawing on her discarded paper under the table, John curled up reading a book – also under the table – and Scott…well, Scott could be anywhere…

He loved seeing her at work, one pencil in her hair, one behind her ear and one in her hand. Jeff always paid far more attention to her own designs…some were quite revolutionary and gave Jeff goosebumps when he saw their potential. He made sure that these were squirrelled away for an appropriate time.

When Jeff was off-planet and it was just herself and her boys Lucy revelled in being the Mum of three incredibly bright children.

Not even three yet and Virgil was already showing promise of following her footsteps in music. John was so bright she worried about how to keep him engaged, until she found out that Scott – even though he was five years older – was teaching John what he was learning at school, and the red-head was drinking it all in.

She knew that she was no slouch when it came to Maths, but the speed at which Scott and John worked out some equations left her blinking. It also amused her no end that her children both adored Maths but they loved different branches of the subject, yet both areas worked so well together.

Mornings were spent designing, looking over engineering designs and keeping a distant eye on Tracy Industries while keeping a close eye on Virgil and John. Afternoons were spent with John and Virgil until Scott got home from school, mostly reading, drawing and making music. And cooking. 

John may not be anywhere near as active as either of his brothers, preferring to read or watch, but he loved to get involved with cooking. It was the only activity he didn’t mind getting dirty for. Scott also enjoyed learning to cook but he was often too impatient when waiting for the results. It warmed her heart to see him hopping from foot to foot in front of the stove.

They grew up fast.

‘Daddy! Daddy! Look what I can do!’

Scott had been practicing climbing one of the trees in the yard for when Jeff got home from the Moon and the first opportunity he had he’d tried to get his Dad to come watch. Lucy had been wary but also proud as he practiced, sharing his elation when he became good and fast, climbing like it was natural to him.

At his call Jeff had sighed, but one look from Lucy had him following Scott into the yard. He watched as Scott began to scale the tree, keeping to himself the annoyance that was growing as Scott kept looking back down at him. Stupid boy was going to fall if he didn’t keep his eyes on where he was going…

Of course Scott lost his footing and fell, breaking his arm quite badly.

The telling off that Jeff had given Scott had subdued him for several days and for a long time afterwards Scott had been withdrawn from his brothers. Lucy found herself unable to balance Jeff’s words out for once, despite constantly trying, so eventually she had sat him down and had a chat with him about responsibilities and balancing that with his own wants and needs. It had still taken him longer than she would have liked but he did get back to his bouncy self.

Over the next couple of years Scott’s irrepressible nature just grew and grew, despite several dressing-downs from his Dad and lectures about looking out for his brothers. And with his growing age came a growing number of incidents and broken bones. 

Most could be put down to child high jinks but Lucy knew in her heart that no matter the amount of times she told Scott he was good enough there was that little voice in the back of his head that sounded like his father and that told him nothing he ever did would be good enough for Jeff…Lucy could see it in his actions around his father, how he was always trying so hard to get something from Jeff. Knowing that Jeff just wasn’t going to give Scott the validation he needed Lucy made sure that, as much as she could, she heaped praise and commendation on her eldest son.

It was also during this time that teachers at Scott’s school began to notice little changes in behaviour. Jeff on the Moon and Jeff at home produced two different Scotts, and – unknown to Lucy – reports were made and submitted regarding concerns of neglect, especially since Jeff had forgotten to pick him up several times. The levels of injuries were beginning to worry some of them too, especially Scott’s baseball coach.

Lucy had not been to a teacher-parent conference alone – NASA’s schedule meant that Jeff was always available for these – and no teacher, not even Scott’s baseball coach, felt bold enough to confront the Great Jeff Tracy in the school, not wanting to cause a scene and some not wanting to lose jobs they couldn’t afford. News had rapidly spread of teachers losing not only their jobs but also pensions and being blacklisted and unable to find another job – and that was just the threats known. Whispers of other things happening were also rife.

Whatever reports did make it to the correct officials were quickly buried in paperwork and red tape, something Miles Helsan was very, very good at. After all, Jeff Tracy paid him to be the best and he prided himself on being the best. It became a matter of pride that he’d wrapped those complainers up in so much red tape that none of them dared to even try to speak to Lucy about what was going on.

~

Not long after Virgil had turned three Lucy found out she was pregnant again. 

She didn’t know how she felt about this pregnancy. 

Lucy had been so careful after failing to leave Jeff. She knew that their…relationship was not a balanced one and she didn’t want to give him any more power over herself and her boys, but there had been a severe meningitis outbreak at Scott’s school and every student and family member had been tested. Lucy had tested positive for the bacteria although she didn’t have the infection and had been put onto a course of strong antibacterials. What she hadn’t thought about was how they would cancel out her secret birth control.

Jeff was ecstatic and immediately talked to NASA about changing the timing of the next mission. There was some discussion…Jeff might have levied threats of quitting before NASA came to an agreement to bring the mission forward so that he could be back for the last two months of the pregnancy.

Scott was – predicably – as ecstatic as Jeff was at the prospect of becoming a big brother again, and he showed that had he taken Jeff’s talk about looking after his Mom and brothers to heart. Lucy couldn’t help but smile as her ten-year-old suddenly showed that cooking with Grandpa Grant every time they stayed had paid off with stacks of pancakes whenever she would let him get away with it.

Which, as the weeks progressed, became more and more frequent. This pregnancy was not going as well as the others. The morning sickness was much more severe, some days she couldn’t seem to keep even water down.

It came to a head one day in mid-November when Scott came home from school to find Lucy’s head in Virgil’s lap and John on the phone to the emergency services. Scott dropped everything and used his Mom’s mobile to call their Grandparents. Ruth stayed on the line until the ambulance arrived and she asked Scott to hand the phone to one of the paramedics. 

Scott didn’t know what she said to them but they allowed all three children to accompany them since there was no adult in the house and there was no one else who could look after them.

However, the doctors wouldn’t let the three of them into the room while their Mom was being examined. Fortunately they didn’t have long before their grandparents arrived. Grant took them all to the café while Ruth slipped into the examination room.

Grandpa took them home that night while Ruth stayed overnight with Lucy and brought them back the next day where Ruth explained that Lucy would be staying in a couple more days due to dehydration.

They moved that evening to the farm and once Lucy was released she joined them. Ruth had sat the boys down the night before and explained that sometimes a pregnancy doesn’t run smoothly and that their Mom would need careful treatment.

Saying that the pregnancy didn’t run smoothly was a complete understatement. She was in and out of hospital several times before Jeff was due home the day before Valentine’s Day. He’d kept in touch weekly as always but NASA had said they wouldn’t be able to bring him home.

Lucy was admitted three hours before Jeff was due home so his welcome home was forgotten in the mad rush to get to the hospital. Grant kept the boys with him in the private waiting room while Jeff and Ruth staying in the room with Lucy.

Time dragged for Scott and John. Virgil was happy sitting on the floor and using the small table he was drawing with the crayons a kind orderly had brought in. Eventually Grant had two sleeping children with him, Virgil on his lap and John leaning against his side, but Scott refused to sleep despite the tiredness, pacing back and forth. Grant couldn’t help but smile – he was acting exactly as his Father did, right down to the little twist when he changed direction.

It was three minutes after midnight on Valentine’s Day Gordon Cooper Tracy was born.

It was two months before Gordon came home, the day before Scott’s birthday. Scott declared it the best birthday gift he’d ever been given.

Lucy wasn’t the same physically after the difficult birth, and privately the doctors had spoken to Jeff and emphasised the importance that she didn’t bear any more children, at least for a while.

Jeff thought long and hard about his future. NASA was becoming boring. He’d done everything with them he could. There were no more frontiers to be defeated by him. Maybe this scare with Lucy was the kick he needed to start putting his other plans into place.

So he quit NASA and began working Tracy Industries full time.

He hired the 19-year-old daughter of the neighbouring farm who would help with John, Virgil and Gordon and take quite a bit of pressure off of Lucy with housework and cooking. Senna Jones was ecstatic to help, it would help immensely with her plans for a childcare degree.

A new normal began to manifest. Senna allowed Lucy to take the time she needed to recover. Gordon was, thankfully, a happy and easy child. His traumatic start in life didn’t dampen his love of life. Even as a baby he was always laughing and smiling, and Lucy took to calling him her sunshine baby.

John basically ignored Senna but she didn’t mind, explaining to Lucy one day that one of her younger brothers had autism too. It was the first time that someone had labelled John. He’d looked up and levelled a stare at Senna, but then returned to the book he was reading. Lucy shrugged. This was not news to her, but she did suggest that Senna not say that in front of Jeff.

It had made Lucy bite her lip. Jeff wanted – had decided even – that his children were perfect and he’d sack Senna if one whisper of imperfection reached his ears. So she’d just made sure to teach him as much as possible and had suggested frequently that the boys should go to private schools to get the best education. She’d already picked the one that would suit both Scott and John’s unique learning requirements.

At first Jeff had vetoed a private school for both boys, but as John started school and then Virgil and both became targets of bullies Lucy was able to persuade Jeff that they would be safer and learn much better. And of course, having his children private schooled would also be a feather in his cap.

She knew how to stroke Jeff’s ego so that her boys would get the best possible that Jeff’s money would buy. 

As the business leapt from strength-to-strength Jeff had begun to take his family on increasingly high-profile holidays. He bought a chalet in Aspen, Colorado and a beach villa in Rockport, Texas with aims once he hit his multi-billion to add a private island. He had goals to outdo Larry Ellisons legacy, albeit without his egalitarian beliefs…

That summer break after Jeff had bought the villa they went on holiday to the beach. And that was how they found out that Gordon was in fact a merbaby in disguise. They had had their suspicions – trying to get the boy out of the bath was harder than getting him to eat his greens after all – and getting him out of the ocean proved just as difficult.

The four-year-old was in his element. Virgil too seemed to enjoy both the water and the beach. He enjoyed building elaborate sandcastles and digging moats. John…hated everything about the beach but he did troupe down to the beach with them all and sat on a beach towel under an umbrella and read his books. Scott also took to the water as his youngest brother, but he particularly enjoyed the windsurfing and paddleboarding. 

Lucy felt that both Scott and Gordon would benefit from further lessons, maybe even for surfing since Jeff had been talking about selling the Rockport villa already and buying one in either California or Florida. While she knew this was more about moving them ‘in the right circles’ Lucy was determined to make the most of it for all her boys, especially Scott. He was a teenager now and she wanted to give him some interests outside the home for him.

Despite everything she tried to do Scott was still tied to his brothers, bound to them by those hated words of his father. 

“Look after your brothers Scott. That’s what you’re here for.”

She wanted to throttle Jeff sometimes. Especially when her eldest looked at his father with that adoration in his eyes…

The holiday ran from late June to late July. When they returned Jeff flew to New York to finalise a deal that could turn him from a multi-millionaire to a billionaire. 

He had been excited, giddy even, all holiday. He acted more like the man she’d initially met on that fateful night. Jeff had kept his distance from her since Gordon had been born but that holiday…he’d been kind, even to Scott, and one night Senna took the boys to a beach party and the two had a romantic dinner and a lot of wine…

And six weeks later Lucy found out she was pregnant.

This time Lucy took it easy from the very start. The doctors said worrying things like preterm labour, placenta previa and pre-eclampsia. A big concern was high blood pressure, and Ruth had needed to take Lucy to one side to help calm her down.

The chat with Ruth did help to calm her down, and Lucy returned home with a clearer head if not a lighter heart. They sat the boys down – Gordon on Scott’s lap and John and Virgil side-by-side – and explained that yes, they had a new brother or sister on the way but Momma would possibly be as ill as she had been with Gordon.

Scott paled but immediately rallied, holding Gordon tightly as he promised Lucy that he’d look after his brothers just as Daddy said he should. Lucy couldn’t quite suppress the shudder at his words, but she knew he meant well. And she also knew that, left unchecked Scott would run himself into the ground caring for them all even at the tender age of thirteen.

This time they were prepared. Ruth offered to move in with Lucy and Senna, but Lucy asked if they could come live with her and Grant instead. When she saw how Grant’s face lit up Lucy knew she’d made the right decision. Jeff also agreed that moving in with his parents was a good idea. Setting up the new headquarters in New York was more complicated than he’d thought it would be so he was happy that he could spend more time there and not worry about his wife. 

Lucy had been annoyed at first, but as the week passed and Jeff still wasn’t home she decided to regard his continued absence as a gift for Scott and his brothers. And at the end of the week they moved wholesale to the Tracy Farmstead. The school had been reluctant to let Scott and John leave for almost two-thirds of the school year but with Lucy promising that they would remote in and that she’d ensure they did their homework – not that that had been an issue for either of them. Virgil they decided to delay putting into school – with his late birthday it was something they could legitimately do – but he’d attend the classes with his older brothers for some of the time.

Senna was excited to live on a real farm too, and Scott spent the first few days waking her up at “silly-o’clock”, as she called it, to teach her how to collect the hen’s eggs and the other early morning chores around the farm, but she secretly loved it.

The three women planned out the week’s activities to include the schooling Scott and John and used the farm as much as possible to help illustrate the lessons. All four boys thrived.

Jeff called every week. The new headquarters were almost ready for use and he kept his parents and Lucy entertained with stories of what was going on and who he’d been networking with. He’d already secured two new contracts that promised to take Tracy Industries international with help from a new acquaintance. Lord Hugh Creighton-Ward had been at some kind of gala Jeff had attended and the pair had hit it off. Jeff had all-but crowed about the budding friendship to his family, inviting the Brit over for their summer holiday next year.

Late December Jeff finally made it home. He felt guilty for the months he’d been apart from his family, and over Christmas he booked their cabin in Aspen and the neighbouring one so that Grant and Ruth could stay as well. He timed it for after the birth but before Scott’s birthday, and right up until the end of the Christmas holidays it was all the boys could talk about.

In true Tracy fashion the baby decided not to come on time, this time delaying like Virgil had done. As the promised skiing holiday approached ever closer Scott, John and Virgil began to get increasingly worried that the baby would come while they were away, but to everyone’s relief Alan Shepard Tracy was born with ten days to go before they were due to leave.

The delivery was smooth and textbook, there was no tearing or other issues and mother and baby were released the same day to welcoming arms and delighted brothers. 

As expected Scott was besotted, trying to take over nappy changing and burping times so that his Mom could have a rest. John – at no point interested in this messy side of being a big brother – nonetheless spent time reading to Alan, and even Virgil tried helping Scott. Senna found herself chasing the boys out of the nursery frequently so that they would do the other things children should be doing, like homework and playing…

Gordon could be found some days curled around his little brother, talking away to Alan or sharing his toys with him. It was the only time the family had ever seen Gordon still – even eating or drinking he was in constant motion, a trait he shared with his biggest brother.

Jeff and Lucy talked about delaying the holiday since the birth had been so close, but Lucy demurred. She’d have Ruth and Senna there, between them both she would be well looked after.

Most men her father’s age were spending their retirement watching sports, visiting with friends, and playing games with their grandchildren. But most men weren’t her father. He’d stepped back from the world. He was still a protector, but of the wilderness rather than of people. Kayo hoped to give him those grandchildren someday, but that day was further into the future than she liked to admit to. 

The sound of her motorcycle was lost in the noise of Kota Belud, but once she was outside of it, she could see the ragged crown of  Mount Kinabalu over the trees. As she got further into the interior and started to climb the cooler it got and the fewer people were on the road for her to dodge with her 'cycle. As glad as she was to be ‘home’, as much the people, the language, and the landscape soothed and relaxed her, nothing could quite touch the hollow feeling in her gut. She had questions. Big, serious questions that only one person could answer: her father.

As one of the rangers of Kinabalu, Kyrano was allowed to live inside the confines of the park itself. This meant that Kayo could bypass the line of tourists waiting to enter the park, show her pass to the gatekeeper, and just ride on in, leaving the visitors to gape at the slender woman in cargo pants and t-shirt getting into the park before them. The forests were even lusher than what she’d passed through to get here. Her father and the other rangers took their positions of guardians of one of the world’s treasures very seriously. The enclave where the park staff lived was so small that it didn’t even have a proper name, it was just called Town. She stopped at the edge of the small drive and looked the house over. It was up on stilts as was traditional, nestled in a profusion of plants The house itself was all the shades of brown, with handsome fretwork around the wooden eaves on roofs that were high peaked to shed the rains. She pulled out her phone and took a picture of it. Virgil would love to have it as a photo reference.

The mere thought of Virgil and the shape she’d last seen him in, made the pit in her stomach grow deeper and darker. She had to know why. Why they had stayed? Why had her father even worked for that man in the first place? She parked her motorcycle beneath the house next to the battered and ancient pickup truck. It might have been new once, back when Grandma Tracy had been a young girl. She grinned at that thought, she was also glad to see it. Even though she’d let her father know she was coming, his time was not his own. If the park needed him, he would see to it first. Not that Kayo expected any less, being that guardians ran in the family. The sad exception to that was her uncle.  She took the stairs quickly, for all her questions and concerns, she’d missed her father deeply.

Before she could even raise her hand to knock, the door opened and her father was smiling at her. <Daughter!>

<Father!> The Malay was rough on her tongue, she hadn’t spoken it in far too long. Something she would remedy with John’s help. But for right now, she fell into strong arms and a tight hug.

The hug was broken far too soon for her liking, but her father brought her into the house, and from there, not to the richly appointed and vibrant sitting lounge but to the simple kitchen. She was given pride of place while he bustled around getting her cream tea and slices of brightly colored layer cake. Kayo’s mouth watered a little. She could make a version of it, but it never tasted quite the same as her father’s. Maybe something to do with the water on the Island.

The Island, Feather and Ma'at, the bone deep pain in all her brother's eyes. All her questions flooded to the forefront. She had questions and there would be no delicate dancing around, such as what she had to do with others. This was her father, and she could be as blunt as she needed to be. Whether or not she’d get her answers, was a very different matter.

He sat down at the table with his own cake and drink. “I am so very glad to see you, my heart.”

A small tendril of guilt grew thorns and stabbed its way through Kayo’s mind. She’d not made nearly enough time for her father since - since the Zero-X. “I’m happy to see you as well.” She reached over and took his hand, it was rougher than she remembered and the once salt and pepper hair was now fully silver. Oh, she’d lost so much time with him and not all of that could be laid at that man’s feet.

“Then eat. I rose before the birds to make that for you.” A gentle grin softened the words.

At that moment, she wasn’t sure if she could get the cake past the lump in her throat. But she nodded, squeezed his hand, took a swallow of the tea, and set to the cake with a will. It was better than she remembered: airy layers, slightly sweet, and colored like the sunrise. She’d missed this. There was little conversation, mostly Kayo listening to her father talk about the park and some of the silliness that the tourists got up to.

She laid her fork on the plate; the cake had helped to settle her nerves. “Father - I need to ask you a question."

“Of course Tanusha, if I can answer it, I will.”

Tanusha, almost no one called her that anymore. It made her feel warm and protected, which gave her the last bit of courage she needed. “You know that - Jeff,” she couldn’t help the derision that dripped from the name, "has come back. I need to know why we stayed. I knew at the time something was wrong. Especially with the way he treated Scott. Please, Father, tell me why we stayed?”

He sighed, “Because there was no other choice.” He rose, picked up the dishes, and headed to the sink.

The simplicity of that answer stunned her for a moment, then she went after him. “No other choice? That makes no sense!” She stood next to him so she could watch his face. “You left the Island many times, I was in school for much of that, we could have gotten away.” That would have meant losing her brothers, which would have broken her heart - “Was it the others? Is that why we stayed?” She needed to understand.

He turned from the sink and cupped one side of her face. “My beloved child.” He kissed her forehead. “We stayed because your father was a weak and terrified man. One that discovered far too late the cost of his salvation."

She searched his face; his eyes, always kind, were now sad and hurt. More wrinkles than she thought should be there as well. He seemed to gain years just standing in front of her. “Father?”

His thumb traced over her cheek. “Please, Tanusha, please, let this old man keep his shames to himself? I ask nothing else from you but that.”

A piercing squawk shattered what thoughts she had gathered. Her father cursed softly as the squawk sounded again. He pulled a slim radio phone out of his pocket. She hadn’t even noticed it. “Kyrano.” The old and sad man vanished before her eyes. Once again her father stood in front of her, his face in a thunderous scowl. “Which gate?” He moved through the kitchen and headed for the door. “I’ll be there as soon as I can. Keep them damp and see if we can find out where they were taken from. Out.”

“Father?” She hated how tentative her voice sounded. But everything was spinning around her and she had no clue what was going to land where.

The face that turned her way was once again sorrowful. Kind, but sorrowful. “Oh, my dear one.” He closed his eyes for a moment. “I am needed. Some plant poachers were caught at the main gate. I need to see if the plants can be saved and find out where they were taken from.”

Duty over self, Kayo knew that one all too well. She had learned it at this man’s knee. “Of course.”

“Will - “ he took a deep breath, “will you still be here when I return?”

She may have hated how her voice sounded, but his was afraid and it hurt her heart to hear it. She had to fix that. “Of course, I will be. I’ve missed you so much.”

He crossed back and kissed her gently on the brow once again. “Thank you, my blessing. I will return as quickly as I can. The left room is yours.”  He vanished through the door.

She heard the ancient truck growl to life, even with the new fuels, an internal combustion engine sounded like nothing else. Habits of a lifetime had her rinsing the dishes and setting them to dry before she went down to get her bag. The room on the left was as cheerful as the rest of the house. Pots of orchids lined the windows, giving the air a delicate perfume. The bed was raised in the old style, not that she minded in the slightest, it was covered in the lightest of linen sheets. Her small amount of clothes and toiletries barely made a ripple in the flow of the room.

But now she was at a loss. She had books she could read, she could nap, and she could even wander the garden that surrounded the house, but - she was still uncertain. “Get a hold of yourself Tanusha!” she said out loud. “You have a procedure, follow it.” She got out the tiny sensors and went about setting them. Yes, this was her father’s house. Yes, they were inside a protected national park and a global treasure. But being careful, especially over these last years, had become ingrained. It gave her a measure of comfort as she did so.

She paused outside the other bedroom. It was his, but she would be remiss if she didn’t set sensors in there as well. Feeling very much like an eight-year-old entering a forbidden space, she slid the door open. It was a great deal like the one he’d given her, yet at the same time, different. It was the same warm brown as the rest of the house, but there were no pots of flowers lining the windows, it was plain, almost austere. This was where he came to rest and nothing else. There were no personal touches of any kind, except for the small table on the north wall. In the middle of the table, in a frame of pale wood was a picture of her mother. Surrounding it were bowls of fruit. In front of the picture was a joss bowl with a thin coating of ash. She ran a finger over the frame of the photo. There should have been flowers, but that wouldn’t have been right for her mother or her culture.

She stood looking at the image long enough for the shadows to move across the floor. She could barely remember her mother: Lakshmi. She’d been told many times that she was a near twin of her mother. She didn’t believe that. The Lakshmi in the photo had a sublime beauty, something Kayo could see only distant hints of in the mirror. The only trait she was sure she shared with her mother were the color of her eyes; they were the same golden green. She gave herself a small shake, and touched the frame. "I love you, Mama," then she slipped from the room.

-o-o-o-o-

The fire of sunset had long since faded by the time Kyrano returned, tired but satisfied. Kayo had explored the house enough to find everything she needed to make kolo mee for dinner. She did wonder if her father had meant to make it for her, since it was a childhood favorite and one she’d not had in far too long. So he was greeted by the warm smell of freshly fried onions. “Daughter?” “Father!” She wiped her hands and greeted him with a hug. “I thought you’d like dinner when you got back.”

The hug she got in return was tight and lingering. “Daughter, you didn’t need to do this.”

She squeezed him and stepped back. “No, I didn’t need to, I wanted to.” She ran a critical gaze over him. “You need to change. There are no ragamuffins at my table.”

Kyrano laughed since that was what he had told her any number of times while she was growing up. “Yes, my blessing, at once my blessing.” Kayo swatted at him with a grin. He flowed out of the way with ease, more laughter, and headed to his room. She turned back to making the meal. By the time he’d returned a bowl of kolo mee was waiting for him. Along with a dish of sambal oelek at his place. That got an eyebrow sent her way. “Surely you haven’t lost your taste for spice.”

“Hardly,” she said, spooning a less vibrantly colored sauce on her noodles. “I still won’t eat that instant death.”

He chuckled, tasted the noodles, then added several spoonfuls of the fiery sauce to his.

“Hmph. I’m surprised you still have a sense of taste.” She started on her own meal.

“It’s a preservative, daughter. How else do you think I’ve lived as long as I have?”

She couldn’t keep the grin inside but she held on until he had a mouth of noodles. “Stubbornness, pure stubbornness.”

He choked from laughing.

Dinner finished, they moved to the sitting lounge with tea. Tanusha was dreading this again, but she had to know. “Father, I must ask, why do you call yourself weak? You are the strongest person I know.”

He bowed his head. “Daughter, please -” “No! I am not a little girl hiding behind your knees anymore. I need to know why. Why did we stay? Why did you even go to work for that man in the first place?" She set her cup aside and grasped his hand. “Please, father. I can’t protect them if I don’t know why. I can’t give that man a single weapon to use against me or my brothers.

He wouldn’t meet her gaze, but he gave a great sigh. “I have feared this day for a very long time.” He swallowed. “I will tell you, Tanusha. I also forgive you if you leave this house hating me and don’t ever wish to speak to me again.” He pulled his hand free from hers.

She sat back, stunned. “I can’t imagine anything you could say or have done that could make me hate you.”

“I pray that it stays that way, but if it does not,” he focused on the far distance, “know that I love you, no matter what you decide."

She was frightened now. “Father?” He sighed again. “It starts with your mother and her parents. I was not their choice for Lakshmi. But your mother was stubborn and for reasons only known to her, she chose me to be her husband.” His smile was small and sad. “I was, and am, grateful beyond words that she did that. Your mother was smart, beautiful, kind, and my joy of being her husband is only surpassed by having you as my daughter.” Tanusha blinked, this was far more naked than she’d ever seen her father.

“I had a good job as head of security of the energy plant outside of Bintulu. I’d been working there since I left school. We were happy.” He closed his eyes. “Then the war happened.”

Tanusha froze, her father never talked about the war. “Lakshmi’s family ordered her to come to them and to bring you with her. I could not leave my job,” he sighed, “nor was I welcome in their ‘safe haven’.”

Tanusha’s contact with her mother’s family had been sparse, at best. But until this moment, she hadn’t realized how much contempt they held for her father. “Your mother thanked them and told them no, she would not leave me. Which turned out to be wiser than anyone knew.” The gaze he turned to her was dark. “Their ‘safe haven’ was Ahmedabad.” She closed her eyes at that. The death toll in that city had been horrific. So many people had crowded into it under the mistaken impression that since it was a cultural and historical jewel, it would be spared. They were wrong. “The spirits only know how your grandparents survived that. But they did, as did two of your aunts, an uncle, and several cousins. After that and the war itself, we didn’t speak with her family.” He shook his head. “Maybe if we had,” he looked down and shook his head, "I have gone over for years what I might have done differently without finding an answer.”

She sat there with her stomach in knots. She didn’t even try to hide her fear and confusion, not from her father. He knew her tells far too well and it would serve no purpose. “I don’t understand.”

“I will try to explain, the years just after the war were an unsettled time. There was still much anger about the Conflict and its horrors. I had only just started working for Mr. Tracy -” “Don’t call him that! He doesn’t deserve your respect.” She nearly bounced out of her seat with her fury.

The look he gave her blunted her rage only a little. “I have nothing else to call him, but he lost my respect long ago, Tanusha. If I may?”

“We’ve been calling him either ‘that man’ or UnNamed.” She sat back with a huff.

“You may, daughter, but I cannot.” He took a swallow of his tea. “I had just started working for Mr. Tracy, mostly to oversee security concerns. It was a good job, with higher pay than either one of us had had before.” He closed his eyes for a moment. “I should have been looking over my own security as well.” He looked to the middle distance and from there, the past. “You were ill. One of those fevers that small children get. But Lakshmi was worried when it hadn’t gone down after a day. We left Kawasan and headed to Bintulu Hospital." He got up to pace. "It should have been a simple trip! The roads were in good shape!" "Father." She wanted to soothe him, but had no idea how to.

He shook his head. "No, I need to say the words." He took a deep breath. "You were fussing. Your mother was trying to comfort you. I - I only took my eyes off the road for a moment. It should have been safe, there was no other traffic." He bowed his head. The next thing I know, I'm in hospital with neither you or your mother nearby." He sat back down with a humorless chuckle. "I caused a great deal of upset by getting out of my bed in an effort to find you both." He rubbed at his left shoulder. "The only thing anyone is sure of, is that I was burned in an effort to protect you."

She held her teacup in a tight grip. She’d grown up seeing the burn scars that had covered her father’s back. But until this moment she hadn’t known how he’d gotten them.

"I still do not know or remember what happened. Spirits know I have tried everything I could think of. A single car accident they called it. Not enough of our vehicle to see if we'd encountered someone or something else." He reached for his tea. “When I regained consciousness for the second time in hospital, the first words I spoke were to ask where you

and your mother was. Lakshmi was dead and you were in the care of family. I assumed it was Belah, but I was wrong. Your uncle had come from India to claim you. I still thank the spirits that the government would not let him leave the country with you, or I would have never seen you again. Your mother’s family claimed you as theirs. They said you would be better off with them. I would be spending weeks, if not months in the hospital. When that did not sway people.” He bowed his head. “They claimed that I had caused the crash intentionally because I was seeing another woman and wished to be free from your mother. Belah fought to keep you - "

She couldn’t help the scoffing sound at that.

He gave her a look. “Belah was not yet the man he is now.” He turned back to his tea. “I have wondered sometimes if the efforts he went to and the contacts he made in fighting your grandparents started him on the path he is now on.”

She froze at that. She couldn’t wrap her mind around the fact that the Hood could have been other than what he now was. Nor could she fathom the idea that she might be part of the reason for the acts he had done.

Her father continued on, unaware of the landmine he had set off. “I still do not know how Mr. Tracy found out about things, other than I was in the hospital. I didn’t even know that for sure until he came in just after Belah left.” He swallowed. “Your grandparents had tied things up with so many lawyers and strings we couldn’t even think where to start. I hadn’t seen you in weeks and was terrified that I would never see you again. Suddenly, Mr. Tracy was at the foot of the bed, asking how he could help.” He closed his eyes. “I was weak and frightened with the idea of losing you along with the loss of your mother - he was kind and wanted to help, so I told him everything.” Tanusha’s shock melted before the fury at that man taking advantage of a wounded man, deep in grief for his wife, and distraught with the idea of his daughter being taken away from him. A snarl crossed her face. “I will gut him like a fish and leave him to die in the sun.”

“blessing, you will do no such thing!” The rebuke was sharp. “I have given up too much to let you throw your life away in revenge. On anyone.”

She flinched and bowed her head. “Yes, father.” She was deeply ashamed. Her father had surrendered everything to keep her safe and with him. She was smarter than that, but hearing yet one more unscrupulous action from that man against the people she loved - was hard. She needed to protect those she considered hers just as much as her father.

He reached over and took her hand. “My blessing, I know. Trust me, I know these feelings. I have had them many times but I had too many depending on me for me to act on them. Having them is perfectly normal, acting on them is not.”

She nodded and swallowed. It then struck her, how many times had her father swallowed his words? Pulled back on his need to protect? “I’m sorry, father.” She brought her head up. “I will not do that, but I will wish for it.”

Making his way to the side of the bed, he reached for the switch for the reading light. It was a bright focused light and caused a hiss of pain to escape the patient. He angled the light further onto them so he could get a clear look at the damage. Virgil jerked his head stiffly away from the light, but not before Jeff caught sight of the tell tale wet tracks down his cheeks, traitorously reflecting back the light.

“Are you crying?” It was a flat accusation, without any emotion attached. 

Eyes squeezed tighter for a fraction of a second while he battled to get the pain under control.

“Really? I expected better from you. You need to be stronger than this.” He turned his back on him, and distractedly poked at some of the medical paraphernalia laid out on a nearby trolly. 

“What good will crying do?”  

A ragged breath was drawn in, not nearly as quietly as Virgil had been aiming for. 

The tweezers that had been idly turned over in Jeff’s hands, got tossed with a little more force than necessary onto the tray. 

“Really? Pull yourself together Virgil,” 

Virgil didn't trust himself enough to reply in a way that wouldn't further aggravate the man, so stayed silent, willing the teardrop currently teetering on the edge of his lashes, to stay put. It didn't, trailing a line of damming moisture through the remaining grime on his face. 

Scott loved having his Dad home more. He sat enraptured as his Dad sat with John on his lap and told stories of his time in space. They did fun things together. One of the neighbours had given Scott a baseball mitt and ball, and he began tossing it up in the air and catching it.

He’d asked his Dad several times if he could play with him, but his Dad was a busy man. He’d taken to asking Scott if he could help out more with his brothers, to try and give his Mom a rest while Virgil wasn’t sleeping very well – it turned out that Lucy hadn’t been lying and the boy had come down with a nasty chest infection, closely followed by John.

Only too happy to help his brothers, Scott found himself doing more and more, grabbing juices and fruit, reading to both his brothers to help them sleep. And always he got that warm feeling inside when his Dad praised him.

‘Well done, Scott. You’re a good big brother, looking after your brothers. It is what you were born to do.’

Scott didn’t understand why his Mom frowned when his Dad said this. But he was happy with what he was doing, and he did love helping!

Three weeks into Jeff’s vacation and Lucy’s distant relative – he’d already forgotten who that was – had a serious fall and needed some temporary help for a few weeks. Lucy jumped at the chance to help, hoping that some time away from his father would do Scott good, but the man, unused to having children around him, had said he couldn’t take all three. With Virgil and John so young he agreed to them but refused to have Scott. The seven-year-old would be far too active for him.

Lucy had almost said no, but the pull of family – even one as distant as this one – when she’d lost everyone else finally had her agreeing, but only after she’d secured some serious promises from Jeff to look after Scott. Properly look after him. With Scott due back at school anyway Lucy hoped that it would be easier for Jeff to fulfil his promise. Saying goodbye had been hard. Scott had cried for a bit until his Daddy had put a hand on his shoulder, pulled him away from his Mom and gruffly spoke to him.

‘Big boys don’t cry, pull yourself together. You need to set a good example for your brothers.’

He’d done his best, but from the sigh he thought that maybe his best hadn’t been good enough. It had helped to see that his Mom was just as upset, but it seemed that was alright because she was a girl.

With his brothers gone Scott felt at a bit of a loss for a while. He’d never really been on his own, nor had he ever really been without his Mom for longer than the two or three days she had been in the hospital. His Dad was amazing, but he was also busy, and Scott knew that there were times Daddy needed to work and he needed to be quiet.

Jeff had another month at home before he was due back, but with it being just the two of them he decided to return to work early. He took the next week to work out how he would cope with the two or more months Lucy would be away. Inspiration struck and he made a deal with one of the multitude of kids the neighbours had.

18-year-old Angel Reyes had plenty of experience with younger children and agreed to take Scott to school and pick him up in the evenings. She wouldn’t be able to do that first day back as she had other things already planned, but she was happy to oblige as she had her own brother to pick up too.

So all Jeff had to do was keep Scott happy for five days. He could do that. He really could.

That first night without Lucy and his boys was rough, but not for the reasons Jeff thought it would be.

Scott had gone to bed reluctantly, having asked for a story which Jeff had no desire to read, but the boy was a persistent little…shite and eventually Jeff had caved just for some peace and quiet. He could have yelled at the boy, but he at least wanted to attempt to keep his promise to Lucy.

That lasted until around 1 am when a snivelling boy attempted to crawl into bed with him.

Being woken up was never a good move – he was like a bear with a sore head he’d been told – and as Scott’s sniffing dissolved into real tears and hiccups Jeff lost it all together, growling once more for the boy to pull himself together and act like a man. He resolutely refused to allow Scott into the bed with him. Starting down that path was something he wasn’t willing to do.

Jeff wasn’t sure when Scott calmed down because he went straight back to sleep, but if he thought this event would cool the boy’s attitude to him down then Jeff was sorely mistaken, as the 6 am wake-up call proved.

Scott jumped up and down on the bed, loudly proclaiming it was a great day for playing and jumping off with a loud thud.

Jeff groaned.

Halfway through the morning Jeff sat in the kitchen with an extra strong black coffee and a sour face. Scott had been on the go since 5 am and just wanted to do stuff with him. Jeff was pretty sure he’d never been on the go like this at his age, but then he’d been a farmer’s son so early mornings were a natural way of life.

He’d relented somewhat, if only to get the boy to leave him alone, and promised after lunch to play ball. It had been a long time since he’d played any sport, he’d been too invested in being the best academically to ensure his desired career path was as smooth as possible.

Jeff did have some early memories of his Pa and himself tossing a ball back and forth, and he drew on these as he threw the ball and Scott caught it in his mitt. He fumbled it a couple of times but Jeff kept up a steady stream of balls, hoping that the exercise would wear the boy out.

It didn’t. As Scott ran from side to side trying to catch the balls his grin didn’t falter and nor did his enthusiasm.

And Jeff began to get annoyed. And he began to throw a little harder. A little faster.

And still Scott ran and caught. Or rather ran and dropped the ball.

‘Scott. You need to try harder to catch the ball. You’re fumbling too much.’

Jeff growled under his breath as once more Scott fumbled his catch. And then he growled more as the boy laughed. Scooping the ball up, he tossed it in the air a couple of times until Scott was in position.

He watched Scott bend his knees slightly and held his hand and mitt ready to catch, with his wrists almost touching. Something in the back of his mind said that the mitt was held incorrectly but Jeff didn’t really care anymore. He had things he wanted to do and to finish this ridiculous game.

Jeff threw the ball. Hard.

Scott grinned and watched the ball as it headed straight at him. He moved his hands to catch but he was too slow. The ball bounced off the tips of his glove and hit his collarbone. For a split second Scott froze, eyes wide before he let out a high pitched scream and burst into tears, dropping the glove as if it had burned him and clutching his arm.

‘Daddy! Daddy!’

‘Scott, it was just a baseball hit. Stop crying.’

‘But – but - ’

‘Remember what I said yesterday? Big boys don’t cry. Not ever. So stop. Now.’

‘O-O-Ok Daddy.’

He tried, but the pain was really bad and he couldn’t stop the tears. Jeff watched from where he was standing until it became clear that the tears were not going to stop. He rolled his eyes and strode over the boy, looking him over. Jeff frowned when he realised Scott’s left shoulder had dropped down and forward and cursed. He knew a broken bone when he saw one.

‘Ok, Scott. Let’s get you to the clinic.’

Scott’s crying subsided as his Daddy helped him into the truck, doing the seat beat up but tucking it under his shoulder and around his waist so that it wouldn’t hurt him further. And then they were off. Scott didn’t take any of the drive in, he concentrated on keeping his crying quiet so that his Dad could concentrate on driving.

Jeff drove to the smaller clinic, the one where his Mom didn’t work – he really didn’t want someone to call her yet – and helped Scott out of the car, marching him up to the doors and into the clinic.

Several hours later they arrived home as the sun was setting. Scott’s arm was in a sling and the boy was virtually asleep, having been sedated so that his clavicle could be manipulated. Carefully Jeff put the boy to bed and then went to his study, poured himself a whisky and contemplated what on earth he was going to say to Lucy. Or his Ma.

Fifteen minutes later Jeff was deep in conversation with Tim Casey and making plans and that call went on for several hours – and several whiskies.

 Superhero bedding was superhero bedding after all and not the sort of thing you turned down at the age of 6 just because it had once belonged to your brother. If anything it added to the mystique. A stint as a WASP, had only added to his rather matter of fact approach to bedding choices. Clean linens were clean linens, beyond that who cared a monkey's fart? Although even Gordon had to laugh at the weird sight his bed currently presented. The sheet was mottled from where a red and a blue sock had got caught in the washer with it, one sock is unlucky, two felt like a set up, because Gordon was bound to get the blame for the resulting tie dye effect. The fabric of the pillowcase was bobbling, proving it to have been one of Scotts at some point in its lifespan. Scott sprouted stubble faster than other people blinked, and any time he didn't keep religiously on top of it Scott went full hobo, add in the fidgeting from restless nights and the sheets got shredded. Which was precisely what happened when they crash landed at the house. Scott had seemed to hit a wall, the change in speed from commander and business leader had been dramatic enough to cause whiplash. Gordon and Alan had watched on, stuck between wanting to give him some time and space to process everything, and at the same time wanting to support in any way they could. The stubble had run wild, the hair had gone unstyled and Scott had never looked further from the sleek professional of only weeks before. Gordon and Alan held whispered conferences trying to work out what they could do to help, well they had until they had been unable to come to an agreement and Alan had resorted to just throwing a wash bag at Scotts head and demanding they stop living on takeout and go get some proper food. Which ultimately had been far better than the prank that Gordon had been devising and Gordon had been forced to admit that Alan had been right. Either way, it had been enough to trigger Scotts protective instincts . 

It soon became apparent the sparse personal possessions they had taken with them when they left the island had not contained any practical items. The house itself had mostly been used as a holiday bolt hole and as such, whilst containing 4 bottle openers, had very little by way of useful items for general everyday use. There had been many emergency trips to the shops to grab “essentials”, where Scott would refuse to let Gordon or Alan pay for anything for themselves and poured all his energies into trying to make everything just right. Eventually Gordon had taken him to one side and very tactfully suggested that maybe he should consider - calming the fuck down. He pointed out that Alan would be absolutely fine sleeping on the couch for a week until his new bed could be delivered, and No, Scott did not need to give up his own bed or drive 45 minutes each way to buy a camp bed to tide Alan over. The kid regularly slept on the floor for goodness sake and was still young enough not to regret it the next morning. Gordon also explained that there was no rush to get everything sorted, it was fine, and that they hadn’t followed him only for free accommodation. 

Obviously Scott was obliged by the long tradition of siblings to counter this with the time honoured retort: “who said anything about free?!” with a feeble smile,  and at least a slither of the ice was broken.

Scott continued to live on a diet of guilt and overcompensation  as a way of showing his gratitude for the solidarity that his brothers had shown. Gordon continued to lightly poke fun at him, whilst trying to prise as many of the self appointed tasks off Scotts to do list that he thought he could get away with.  

Alan had got in on the act and took possession of the kitchen. It was that or they were in serious risk of running out of counter space due to all the “essential” gadgets that Scott kept bringing home.