#entry 11

Been working on character concepts for Wulf. I have a distinct look I’m trying to emulate for him. It’s based upon character designs I did years ago when my art was less developed and I lacked the skills to follow through with my project ideas.

My Ancient Art From Years Ago :P

(Here it is -- my character design from years ago when my skills were less developed. Wasn’t sure if I should include this but I thought, well, why not? Besides, it does give the clearest reference for where I got my current character design from. So enjoy my ancient art! <3 )

Eadwacer’s design is technically based off of some of my older concepts too.

(Here is the old concept it’s based off):

I’m still coughing and spluttering all the time, but at least I’m able to work, sort of. Also I’ve been making a list of some of my inspirations for the project so far.

Inspirations and sources:

Ophelia

Judas

Rock Opera

Shakespeare

Lore Olympus

Xena

Murakami 

Final Fantasy X

Persona 4

Sailor Moon

Sailor Moon colour palette

27th day. Maybe I should just start doing this every three days instead of every other day, since I’m late so often. I’m officially a freak now, since I’m 7 feet tall. I’ve started taking walks in the woods behind Evan’s house, since I know I’d be stared at if I went anywhere with a lot of people.

Dear friend,

Nothing is the same. I’m starting to remember a bit more and more. I sound like a broken record, but its true. I’ve been ignoring my journal because I’ve been in deep thought while listening to music and sitting outside when I’m allowed to. It’s weird. I’ll write more on it when I can get all these thoughts processed.

Ruth Ann said its good to get out for a while, but I should be writing down my thoughts. I just don’t want to share certain aspects yet. Kyle came by today and gave me a crunch bar, peanut butter, and a bottle of strawberry milk. We enjoyed it together while he smoked his cigarette. It was nice to just feel like I was on another date. 

Good news is that I think I’m on good terms with this facility, so I get my door back. However, I’m getting a roommate tomorrow. Kind of nervous...

Wish me luck.

With love,

I know deep down- no not even deep down. So high up! It’s so obvious that I don’t have to know it deep down. That it’s worth it. So so worth it. At least he’s happy about it. And so am I. I am happy about it. But the wait that comes in between is still something I’m trying to get used to. It’s still something that’s making me lonely and frustrated and helpless at times. There are times where I feel so right about it and it’s relieving at times what we are doing now. It even brings me ease too. But why can’t I feel.. the kind of happiness I should be feeling? I’m happy cause it’s the right thing to do. But what about the happiness in doing it? What about the happiness of not being the way we were before now? I don’t think the pain that comes along with this is going to die down pretty soon. This is just the beginning. We haven’t even gotten that far. I’m not scared that I’ll give up. I have confidence that I won’t now. But I’m still scared of not being able to take it. For feeling too hurt and depressed and vulnerable. I think I’ll start feeling the happiness I’m searching for as the days go by.. and as my knowledge strengthens but when? I hope it’s soon. I’m glad that at least he found that happiness so soon. I hope I do too. I don’t want any bitter feelings towards what we’re doing..

The Garlean platoon marched down the road towards the Castellum in the high deserts of Western Gyr Abania. About 15 soldiers, flanked by two Magitek walkers made their way looking nervous

Crouched down under the scrubland to the west, Jordan looked up at the

"Okay. on me mark..." she whispered in her linkpearl.  

"3, 2, 1... attack!"

On Jordan's words, the platoon engaged the Garleans, emerging from seemingly nowhere and surrounding the troops as a great clash of blades, firearms, and magic began.

Jordan rushed the magitek walker, her bill-style axe digging its hook into the space between joints, bringing the walker down to its knees. A thaumaturge behind her cast a fire spell on the main torso of the unit, exploding it in a shower of sparks and ceruleum flames.

Jordan smiled. The platoon was making quick work of the flat-footed Garlean platoon.

Jordan rushed into the fray. She saw a Laquearius try to rush a private from the back. Jordan rushed out, lunging  with her axe, stopping his blow and running her blade through his belly.

The fight ended faster than expected, with the Alliance forces  surrounding the remaining forces of about five men to the Alliance's twenty-five. .

"All right, Give yerselves up."

Most of the Garleans laid down their weapons. One soldier however was firm, desperately holding on to his sword.

"Never! I'll die first rather than surrender to savages!" he said. Jordan walked up and waved her axe.

"Easy lad..." she said. "We're only gonna imprison ye. Damn sight better than any of ye ever did ta us."

The soldier laughed. "I've heard the stories. You Eorzeans deal in bloodshed, revel in it. Just as you you do your eikons!" He charged Jordan who stepped forward, realizing the soldier was inexperienced at fighting small folk and  knocked his sword wrist with the flat of her axe, disarming him. She then used the return force to hit him on the head and bring him down.  

Standing over him now, her axe blade on his throat she bent down and took off his helmet. Jordan blinked, realizing the man was barely more than a boy, not a hair older than seventeen.

"Lad, yer done. We don't mean ta hurt ye."

The young man spit at Jordan. "Never.! You killed my best friend. I saw you, slaughterer!"

Jordan nodded, "Aye, I did. That's the nature a warfare. And..." she paused. "And if 'twere Silvertear or Carteneau, ye'd've joined 'im. Ye lost yer best friend, but I've lost all of me friends, me teachers, too too many dear ta me fer yer Empire's ambitions. Today..." Jordan pushed the weight of her axe on his neck.

"Today, ye should count yer blessings ye've met me today than ten years ago."