#enduer

Flickering his dull gaze towards the other boy mumbling. “I’m fine.” but he really wasn’t but what was new? He just almost got killed by a group of walkers and he ran into alexandria as if his life literally depended on it, which it did. Sweat made his hair stick to his forehead he was only trying to help bring a car into the walls but it was ruined and now he felt humiliated he couldn’t do something as simple as that. He shrugged off his coat gripped it with a vice death grip closing his eyes so he could actually breathe. “Carl really, I’m fine.” he waved a hand at the concerned boy while he looked at his own arms while wiping his face. He wasn’t bit so he was gonna shove this emotion down of panic like he always did. “Didn’t even get the fucking car..” he said angrily under his breath. 

        𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐒𝐍’𝐓 𝐀𝐋𝐖𝐀𝐘𝐒 𝐒𝐎 𝐐𝐔𝐈𝐄𝐓 !       when ben had still been alive , henry had been quite an excited boy , blissfully unaware and kept safe by ezekiel and his brother .              while he couldn’t remember the world before ,   he did remember that one ,   and he supposes it was when that world ended with the war that it was then that he’d grown up .           some might argue his childhood was murdered with his brother , other’s might say the boy killed it himself like he’d killed gavin .      either way , henry wasn’t the same kid he was before .     though    regret   had   been   expressed ,    the things he had done could not be undone . 

watching from a fair enough distance ,     henry watches as the older boy works a stubborn piece of scrap metal into a ninety degree bend ,    pounding a hole into it’s left end with an unheated spike ,    one end flat and wide for the hammer to make impact and drive it’s sharp end through .   hissing under the sudden wash of cold water , the orange glow of metal reflects in carl’s eye from where henry observes , something that a kid from before all of this would have gawked at ,  but because this world was the one he’d known ,  was worth not even a spare glance .   

“ ...   aren’t you afraid you’ll get burned ? “       he nears carl now , coming forward towards the heat fanning off from the flames ,   all the while appreciative though he may not put it into words ,   how the other boy had treated him just now . 

       dawn strikes through the cracks of curtains, sounds of shuffling from the sheets being hastily thrown back and clothes snatched from hangers mark the third day that rick has had to wake carl up from his sleep. every night before, he’s been eager to accompany rick on his early morning patrols until morning sneaked up on him and right in his doorway stood one not surprised sheriff but not the sheriff.  ❝ you’re fifteen minutes later this mornin’ than yesterday, so at least you’re settin’ a record with it. ❞  his sarcasm doesn’t go unnoticed and neither does his hand fanning carl towards the bathroom.  ❝ and brush your teeth this time or i’m arrestin’ you for foul play. ❞

happy  20th  birthday  emmi !  ( @enduer​ )

alright  i’m  gonna  get  super  emo  and  extra  here  but  bear  with  me. 

aristotle  wrote  ( lmao  listen  just  stick  with  me  here  okay )  that  there  were  three  types  of  friendships.  the  first  kind  are  friendships  of  utility,  built  upon  some  sort  of  mutual  benefit  in  the  relationship.  this  is  how  we  met  and  started  talking  [ 1,  2 ]  on  tumblr  rp.  you  were  a  carl  blog  and  i  was  a  lori  blog,  we  both  enjoyed  each  others’  writing,  and  so  we  both  had  something  to  gain  out  of  being  friendly  and  talking  and  writing  with  each  other.

then  there  are  friendships  of  pleasure,  which  is  when  people  seek  out  each  other’s  company  because  of  the  joy  it  brings  to  each  of  them.  this  rapidly  developed  out  of  our  friendship  of  utility  after  realizing  that  we  had  almost  the  exact  same  sense  of  humor,  the  same  interests  ( like  scarily  identical,  down  to  the  same  career  goals  in  psychology,  our  love  of  animals,  and  our  similar  taste  in  shows  and  movies ),  and  could  easily  find  fun  in  each  other’s  company,  whether  it  was  sending  stupid  videos  or  streaming  together  or  just  talking  about  our  day.

but  those  first  two  types  of  friendships  are  common  and  fickle,  because  those  friendships  alone  would  dissolve  if  there  was  no  more  mutual  benefit  to  be  gained  or  if  our  mutual  interests  and  hobbies  were  to  change.  this  brings  aristotle  to  friendships  of  the  good,  which  encompasses  the  other  two  types  of  friendship,  but  develop  into  something  deeper  over  time.  this  occurs  through  mutual  respect,  admiration  of  each  other’s  virtues  and  values,  and  a  desire  to  help  the  other  person  through  life’s  hardships  for  no  other  purpose  than  recognizing  the  other’s  ❝ essential  goodness ❞.  that  means  whether  or  not  it  is  advantageous  or  pleasurable  for  you  to  support  the  other,  you  do  so  faithfully  and  continuously  solely  out  of  your  love  and  belief  in  them  --  in  other  words,  you  are  friends  for  each  other’s  sake.

even  though  this  last  form  of  friendship  is  the  hardest  to  find,  in  my  eyes  that  is  what  our  friendship  has  become.  we  both  care  so  deeply  about  doing  the  right  thing  and  push  each  other  to  grow  in  accordance  with  our  shared  values.  you  have  had  my  back  through  so  much,  both  online  and  offline,  and  supported  me  through  my  lows  without  want  of  anything  in  return  and  always  with  an  enduring  belief  in  me.  i  sincerely  hope  that  i  have  been  ( and  continue  to  be )  this  kind  of  friend  to  you,  someone  who  is  loyally  on  your  team  and  will  be  there  with  you  through  thick  and  thin.  most  of  our  friendship  is  shared  through  laughter  and  fun,  but  what  has  made  it  last  for  two  years  and  what  will  make  it  continue  to  last  are  the  moments  and  gestures  that  make  me  certain  that  we  are  in  each  other’s  lives  for  a  reason.

DECEMBER POSITIVITY  |  @knightif ! 

tag someone who you’ve known/followed/written with/etc for a long time.

oh man, i can already tell these are gonna be tough and i don’t think anyone’s surprised that i’m definitely gonna be tagging more than one person! i’ve been on this blog in particular for over 4 years now??? so, of course, i’ve met a lot of great people along the way! 

i think it would be wrong not to kick it off with @missusgrimes and @enduer who are absolute constants to me here! ana and emmi are both incredible writers and human beings who i’ve come to adore just as much off tumblr as i do on here <33 they’re writing and portrayals are wonderful, unique, and on point -- i love reading their other threads when they pop up on my dash, but ofc i loooooove the things we write together! i feel like i really get to explore so many different things between the two of them and dive in to two really important relationships to rick along the way! discussing our threads/characters/plots/or literally anything is always something i enjoy! i really consider myself very lucky to have been writing with these two over almost all???? of my years writing on this crazy, blue website.

@heartshown / @foughtdeath is another person who’s really been here with me on this blog (and in general) for a reaL long time -- probably almost since i got started here, too! janni quickly became one of my closest friends and, through ups and downs, i’m happy to say that we’re probably closer than ever. she’s such a talented writer who really puts her own spin on any muse she chooses to pick up -- plus, her OCs are always super fun, too and i love going on and on and on with her about character building/plots/or other ways to intertwine all our different muses over the years.  

𝐁𝐈𝐑𝐓𝐇𝐃𝐀𝐘 𝐖𝐈𝐒𝐇𝐄𝐒 𝐅𝐎𝐑 𝐍𝐈𝐂𝐊 !

     𝐇𝐄 𝐖𝐀𝐒 𝐓𝐔𝐑𝐍𝐈𝐍𝐆 𝐓𝐖𝐄𝐋𝐕𝐄 !         and while it wasn’t a particularly important milestone ,    it meant everything all at the same time .      three years since his mom died , even more since she got sick in the first place ,  while it was nothing like a sweet sixteen or twenty-first , twelve was just as important as either of them .  in fact , ever since the death of his mother it seemed more than just “particularly” important to lori , that nick had a proper birthday .            it’s why they’d driven down the day before the twelfth (thankfully the boy having school off for the seasonal break) , and made a beeline straight for kings county .  some might say it was excessive , to drive so far for just a twelfth birthday , and sure …            before his mom had died they probably wouldn’t have done so , but …        it’s because she did die that they did .  nick was a little boy after all , though older than carl , and the loss of a mother at such a young age can only be described as being akin to losing a limb .