A tiny bit of hope...
I've had a BAD year, healthwise. I live with a condition called Reflex Sympathetic Dystrophy (RSD) - also known as Complex Regional Pain Syndrome (CRPS). I prefer the RSD label, as anytime you have something labeled as a "syndrome", people can be really insensitive about it. Yes, it's really there and it's not "all in my head". My nerves and my brain just don't know how to communicate with each other. I went through extensive and invasive testing and can actually pinpoint the cause to a particular incident.
If you've never heard of this condition, I'll try to sum it up as succinctly as possible. You've probably heard of the rare condition where someone can't feel pain, right? This is kinda the opposite of that. For a long time, I couldn't wear socks, could only wear backless shoes, and often couldn't even have a sheet on my leg. Often when I'd shower, the water would feel like razor blades when it hit my right leg. My case is actually incredibly mild compared to many others. I've spoken with a surprising number of people who regularly pass out from shock due to the amount of pain they experience. Fortunately I have a DRG stimulator (I'm a real life cyborg!) that has worked wonders for me and has kept things from getting too out of control since I had it implanted.
Over the past year or two I've had some really concerning symptoms not related to my leg. Nonstop coughing fits to the point that I was convinced I had broken my ribs because I hurt myself so bad from coughing. Constantly choking and struggling to breathe. I underwent testing and after ruling out most other conditions, I was told that it seemed that my RSD had spread to my esophagus. This was terrible news for me, as there's not much I can do about that, and I had already started making an exit plan due to the fact that I absolutely cannot live with this. I'm not weak. This is just one of many serious health struggles I've been dealing with. It is also the most unbearable, and it's made my quality of life terrible. I've held on as long as I have because I'm unfortunately a die hard optimist.
This week I received a tiny bit of hope.
A few days ago things got really bad and I ended up in the hospital. They did some in depth testing and it turns out I have asthma! I have to go back to my doctor bc he's the only one who can interpret the results enough to say how severe it is, but if it's bad enough, it might be the culprit for most of my issues! that's huge because its treatable! My rsd isn't as treatable. I still have it and it's still in my esophagus, but it's also highly reactive to other issues. so if my asthma is controlled, my rsd symptoms might be too!
This news isn't as hopeful as it should be, however, because I live in a country where you're only allowed treatment if you can afford it. And I can't. I live on disability ($350 a week BEFORE taxes), my insurance is crap, and I can't even afford my other living expenses. My meds and doctors appointments are now covered til at least the end of October, possibly the end of December. But after that, I'm out of luck. I have no way of paying for treatment starting in January of 2022. I have been trying so hard to get my Etsy store to be profitable so I can pay for treatment, but it's seems damn near impossible, especially when I don't have money for ads, etc.
If you have the means and would like to support my shop, I would be forever grateful. I am happy to do custom design requests if you don't see what you're looking for. (TWDFamily / Caryl/ Carol fans - I already have SEVERAL premade designs not listed in my shop. Feel free to inquire!) Additionally, you can also purchase gift credit for my shop. Of course I'm always grateful for CashApp donations ($kellyguist), but even typing that makes me feel uncomfortable, so I'll probably try to talk you into letting me do you a favor in return somehow.
If you don't have the means to support my shop financially, there are still REALLY effective ways you can help:
- Share my shop link (etsy.com/shop/spanglecustomapparel)
- Favorite some of my items. This actually helps my listings rank better.
- Leave a review if you've already made a purchase but haven't done so.
Thanks to everyone who has supported me so far, and thanks to those of you who've made it to the end of this. You're the best.
