#direct address

my body breaking down

exhaustion weighing heavy on each individual feature

social battery draining

10%... 9%... 8%... 0%

I wish I could openly sneer in derision of them

gossiping behind their back doesn't feel quite as satisfying

I want to scream, to yell, to go off on them all

but I hold back

I don't step forward

I let them lead

it is a tense dance

and then, there's you

I am switching dance partners

constantly, turning my face to someone new

switching my subtle expressions

my body movements

all to match your tempo

because you're all dancing to different songs

I sing to drown out your songs

I have to hold onto myself

even if it's easier to lose myself in your music

but I have nothing of myself to hold onto

our bodies pressed together intimately

my affection swells

crests

crashes

I am hit with criticism

you dip me to the ground

and I snap

split

where fondness might have been

there is only disdain now

you are not my dance partner anymore

you are my enemy

I lunge

aiming for your throat

but I pass through you

I pass through everything

I am filled with such emptiness

I am empty

I try to grasp onto my hatred for you

desperately needing to hold on

but it slips through my fingers

my mood falling before I can catch it

I slump to the ground

exhausted from our dance

our fight

you, ignorant, turn away