Cooper whipped around. Could he… know? That wasn’t something he was willing to take a chance on. That little shit…

Twenty minutes later, Blaine was skipping out of the car and rushing up to the steps to the literary crypt some people called a library.

To Cooper’s surprise, once inside, Blaine didn’t run downstairs to the children’s section. Instead, he stood off beside the front desk, nervously biting on his finger as his eyes watched the librarian. Being the good brother he was, Cooper stood beside him. “What’s up, squirt? Forget where the baby books are?”

Blaine’s eyes shifted from his brother back to the librarian. “I, uh, need help,” he answered, his voice barely above a whisper.

Cooper gazed back before sighing. He was too nice for his own good. He took his brother’s warm palm and brought them over to the front desk. “’Scuse me? My little bro needs some help.”

The librarian smiled and Blaine squeezed Cooper’s hand. “What can I help you with, sweetie?”

“Um. I… um. I need books on—on sign language?”

Sign language? That was new. Cooper had expected maybe a book on dinosaurs or, Blaine’s latest obsession, the Spice Girls (at least he’s got good taste in women). What could Blaine want with sign?

The lady smiled and began to lead them over. Blaine dropped Cooper’s hand and excitedly followed, chatting happily with the lady, all hints of shyness gone. “—in the third grade, Mrs. Williamson’s class, and today we got a new kid!” Cooper could hear him babble away. Coop shook his head. His brother was strange that way.

Once they had located the books, Blaine grabbed all he could carry and checked them out without hesitation. “Good luck and happy reading!” the librarian said with a wink as they began to head out. Blaine smiled from over his stack of books (“No, Cooper, I can do it!”) and they finally left. It wasn’t until Blaine was buckled up in the back seat that Cooper finally let his curiosity get to him.

“So sign, huh? Why’s that? Trying to learn how to flip someone off without them knowing?”

“What?! No!” Blaine exclaimed, his horrified expression turning away from Cooper’s grinning face to gaze out the window. He was silent for a moment before replying, “We got a new kid today.”

“Oh?”

“Yeah. His name is Kurt and he’s nice but he’s deaf and I wanna be his friend, but my teacher says he only speaks sign so I wanna learn!”

Blaine’s expression was one in which Cooper thought kids only wore on Christmas morning. “That sounds difficult, B. Are you sure—?”

“Yes,” he stubbornly interrupted, sticking out his chin. “I’m gonna learn and be his best friend.” Cooper chuckled. He knew when Blaine got like this, it was best to just let him be and figure things out himself.

“Whatever you say, squirt.”

For the next two weeks, Cooper barely saw Blaine. The boy only came down from his room to quickly shovel food into his mouth, or to practice piano. When Cooper asked their mother what was up, she just shrugged and smiled, saying that Blaine was “practicing.” Practicing what, Cooper didn’t know, but he could guess.

It was while Cooper was watching ER that Blaine came downstairs, finally deciding to rejoin the human race, apparently.

“Sup, little bro. Ready to watch Dr. Ross kick some medical ass?” Blaine shook his head and did some weird movement with his hand. Cooper’s eyebrows scrunched, but he decided to shrug it off. “Suit yourself.” Usually, Blaine was all over this show, watching with Cooper when their mother wasn’t home to tell him otherwise. Cooper’s eyes returned to the screen, but Blaine’s stayed on his brother.

After a few minutes, Cooper made an annoyed click with his tongue. “What is it?”

Blaine’s hands moved hesitantly but smoothly, a small crease between his eyebrows forming in his concentration. He looked kind of cute, Cooper admitted, and it was sweet that he seemed to have followed through with his declaration.

“That’s pretty cool, B. Learning it to impress the lady.” Cooper grinned and wiggled his eyebrows as Blaine’s hands quickly dropped to his side and he huffed.

“I told you, his name is Kurt.”

Cooper didn’t fail to notice how Blaine didn’t deny his implication. “Have you talked to him yet?”

“No,” Blaine frowned, his eyes casting down. “I’m not good enough yet.”

Cooper stared at his brother, his little brother, whose heart was so much bigger than he realized. Blaine was learning a whole new language, on his own, to talk to a little boy who had no other friends. Blaine was going up and beyond for this kid, and he was focused on not being enough. His little brother had no idea of how much of a gem he was.

“Blaine, Blaine, Blaine,” Cooper sighed. He patted the spot beside him on the couch and, after a moment, Blaine shuffled his way over. The couch cushion barely shifted as he lifted his leg and sat down, hands folded in his lap as he looked up at his brother. “Listen, okay? This kid—this Kurt—isn’t going to care if you speak well. He’s just gonna care that you speak. Get it?”

Blaine pressed his lips together and Cooper could see the clocks turning. “So… so he won’t care if I’m bad?”

“Of course not, Blaine. All he’s going to notice is that someone tried, okay?”

And his voice, soft and full of hope and joy, answered back, “Okay.”

It was nearly another full month before Cooper even met the guy.

+++

Cooper had arrived home late after serving a detention for skipping one too many classes. He knew Blaine was home by the time, but the house was startlingly quiet. Not too unusual as of late, when all Blaine wanted to do was teach himself in his room. Cooper kicked off his shoes, and decided to quietly sneak into the kitchen for something to eat. It was Thursday, meaning their mother was already home, so he’d have to hope she wasn’t starting on dinner yet.

He was midway down the hall when he heard it. A giggle.

Not that giggling was unusual for the little giggle monster that was Blaine (especially when he was being tickled), but the giggle wasn’t alone. It was followed by another one, and then more giggling from both. Slowly, Cooper peaked his head into the family room.

There, sitting on the couch, was his little brother and another boy. The boy suited Blaine, as he too was wearing clothing that looked less like children’s clothing and more like a mini-adult’s. Blaine today was wearing a t-shirt and khaki pants, but the boy had on a vest over what looked like a pressed white shirt. Both of them were smiling widely, with those wide sparkling eyes of children, and they would have looked like an image from any advertisement if it weren’t for one thing: the hands. Both boys had hands flying around, quickly shifting from one shape into another. Occasionally, the boy would laugh (a bit of a weird laugh, Cooper noted), and lean forward, adjusting Blaine’s hands. Blaine’s face would flush but then he would laugh too and they both would keep going.

“So!”

Cooper stepped into the room dramatically, his foot kicking out far in front of him as he took the giant step in. A grin was plastered on his face as his eyes shifted from the open doll faces in front of him. “Blaine, you gonna introduce me to your friend?”

Blaine blushed and said, “Cooper this is—“

“Kurt! I knew it!”

Blaine tsked and signed something to Kurt before pointing at his brother. Kurt giggled and then signed something back. “Kurt says hi, and that you must be my brother.”

Cooper grinned and nodded. “I am! I’m the famous big brother I’m sure Blaine has told you many stories about.” Cooper looked over to Blaine. “Make sure to sign this all to him. Blaine has a dorky hair cut because he got sick of his curls one day and tried to cut them off. He has this teddy that he sleeps with every night, and sometimes he refuses to eat his peas just because he doesn’t like how they roll around his plate.”

“Cooper! I’m not telling him that!”

“Blaine, that’s unfair! He can’t understand me, so you’re going to have to embarrass yourself for me!”

Through their bickering, a high-pitched laugh echoed in the room. Even though Kurt didn’t know what they were speaking, he seemed to understand what they were saying. Blaine smiled brightly at his friend and signed something, slow but confidently. Kurt laughed harder.

“What did you say!”

“I said that you keep rotten magazines under your bed.”

“Blaine! That’s not fair!”

But they were all laughing now, giggles and snorts and squeals of delight when Cooper rushed forward and tickled his brother. Kurt soon joined in, and tickles turned to tossing of pillows, which only stopped when Pam Anderson stomped in.

Cooper left the two boys back how they found them, smiling and signing. As Cooper made his way to his bedroom, he couldn’t help but think of how in eight years, he had never seen Blaine smile at someone like he smiled at Kurt.

+++

Cooper absolutely hated being a big brother some days. Mostly on days that involved him having to drive around Lima and area, taking Blaine from this lesson to that class to this friend’s house and so forth when he could be at home killing it on Super Mario. Note to all the kiddos out there: don’t get your licence. Not worth it.

Today, Chauffer Cooper had to pick up dorkasaurus Blainers from uncharted territory: Kurt’s house. He checked the address once more as he slowed down the street, eyeing the houses until he pulled in in front of house 132. The house was not entirely what he was expecting: nice, but plain, with nothing particularly special to mark it, except for an entranceway decorated in chalk.

He honked the horn. Once. Twice. Nothing.

Obviously, Cooper sighed to himself as he shuffled his feet up to the door. The kid is deaf, idiot.

At the door, Cooper paused. It looked… normal. There was a knocker, and a doorbell. Nothing else. He hesitated before carefully pressed his finger against the little button. He heard the ring echo, but he also saw a quick flash of light. Strange.

There was silence, then steady steps, clearly not those of an eight and nine year old. Oh shit…

A gruff man answered the door, wearing a t-shirt and jeans. “Can I help you?”

“Cooper Anderson,” he answered immediately, sticking his hand out on instinct. “Blaine’s brother.”

The man’s eyebrows raised. “Ah. So you’re the guy. C’mon in.”

Cooper followed the man into the house after rubbing his feet on the welcome mat. The inside of the house, too, looked normal beyond belief. The only thing out of the ordinary was a large banner and dozens of balloons. “Uh, wait. Was this--?”

“Cooper!”

Blaine came rushing into the room, big curls and smiles, with Kurt at his heels, mirroring his expression. Their faces were decorated with painted designs: a flower and stars for Kurt, with a dinosaur and daisy for Blaine. Kurt had a crown upon his head, and it seemed like both Blaine and Kurt’s faces would split from their grins.

“Hey little bro. Hi Kurt.” Cooper waved, but Kurt seemed to get it because he waved back before turning and signing something to Blaine.

“Kurt wants to know if I can stay just five more minutes. He was showing me how to do Britney Spears dancing!”

Cooper looked to Burt. “Uhhh…”

“Go ahead, kids,” Burt answered, signing as he spoke. “But only five! You know we have to have our special birthday dinner.” As Blaine and Kurt ran off, Burt rolled his head back over to Cooper. “Kids. Can I get you a coffee, or are you too young for that?”

“Ah, no no, I’ll just—Was today Kurt’s birthday?”

“Yeah.” Burt chuckled. “I asked him if he wanted to invite anyone, and he said just his friends. Turns out, he only asked Blaine.”

There was a sinking feeling in Cooper’s chest. A build up of dread, and fear, and disappointment, but mostly, sadness. Cooper knew that. He knew that. He knew that because he had seen the exact same thing, year after year. Either a swarm of kids who Blaine didn’t seem to care about, or just a very, very small few that paled in comparison to the group Cooper used to hang around with.

“He’s a good kid, that Blaine,” Burt continued, bursting Cooper from his thoughts and unexpected pain. “Only one I’ve ever met who learned because he wanted to, not because he had to. Kurt told me,” Burt filled Cooper in with a knowing glance. “Rushed home from school day, grin to his ears, and told me about this new kid who learned sign for him.” He clucked a chuckle. “Lemme tell ya, that was the first time I had seen him smile like that since his mom died.”

Wow, this conversation really wasn’t helping that sinking feeling…

Burt’s hand slapped down on Cooper’s shoulder and Cooper looked at him with wide eyes. “I think it’s good they got each other. Understand each other. Speak the same language and all that.”

Cooper watched as Blaine ran back into the room, chasing after Kurt, both of them laughing loudly. Blaine had acquired beaded necklaces, and Kurt a tutu. It was something Cooper would have chastised Blaine about at home, saying jokes he knew he shouldn’t but in that brotherly way, in order to chase away the bead of worry in the back of his mind. But here, with Kurt doing the exact same thing, it felt okay.

“Yeah,” he answered softly, “I really think they do.”

+++

Cooper can’t believe his brother’s in the fourth grade, mostly because when he was in the fourth grade, he finally began to notice girls. Not yet in the sexual way, but in that playful, teasing way that boys don’t quite understand. Girls suddenly became weird and interesting. But every time Cooper brings up girls, or jokes about Blaine having a girlfriend, his brother shies away. He would rather make bracelets.

Which, apparently is a big deal, Blaine informs him. They’re not plain our regular bracelets. They’re friendship bracelets.

Which, Cooper knows, means they’re bracelets for Kurt.

“You gonna eat that?” Cooper asked as he sat beside Blaine at the table. He pointed to the milk and cookies their mom had set out, but Blaine barely looked up.

“No.”

“Jesus, Blaine,” Cooper said through a mouthful of cookies, “what the hell is so important that you don’t want cookies?”

“I’m busy.”

“Clearly.”

Blaine worked in silence, tying off the end of a beaded patterned bracelet. The second he finished, he admired the piece, lifting it up and spinning it in the light before beginning on a new bracelet, this one made from coloured string.

“God, how many of those are you gonna make?”

“Four,” Blaine answered without a beat. “It’s Kurt’s favourite number because that’s when he saw Cinderella for the first time. When he was four.”

Cooper watched for a few moments before asking the question he had been dying to since Kurt’s birthday. “Blaine… is Kurt… is he you’re only friend?”

“No.” Relief washed over him. “But he’s the best one.”

Cooper finished off the cookies and set away the empty milk glass and the plate. He walked toward the door to the living room--maybe he can call Vanessa, he thinks she’s home—when Blaine began to speak.

It was babbling, Cooper knew. Words to fill the space rather than to be heard. But something inside of him made him stay and made him listen.

“Because Kurt is the best person. He’s so funny, but what makes him really funny is that he can say things about people but they never know and only I know. Like he calls Mrs. Elliot’s mole Mr. Mojo but no one knows but me and maybe a few other people if they paid attention. It’s like everything is one big personal joke.” Blaine paused as he messed up his pattern and had to go back a few steps to fix it. “And I love that. We have so much fun. He talks to me and listens to me when I talk. He doesn’t pretend to. And he has to look at me when we speak or else he doesn’t understand so I know he’s listening. Not like some people.” His tone wasn’t accusing; it was accepting and factual, as if, at age nine, he already understood that no one really cares. “I just love Kurt. I love how happy he makes me. But not everyone loves Kurt, they call him funny or strange or make fun of him because he can’t hear. But I don’t let the bullies do that, if I can stop it. I don’t have a lot of friends anymore, but I have Kurt, and that’s all that matters.”

He fell silent for a few minutes before he triumphantly held up a finished bracelet, a beaming grin on his face. “See, Cooper! Tada!” Blaine’s face dropped silently, spotting the curious look on his brother’s. “What? Do you want one too?”

Cooper swallowed, and gave a smile that was barely more than a flick of his lips. “Yeah, Blaine. I’d like that.”

As Blaine set back to work, Cooper quietly left the room, understanding more about his brother than he wished he did.

+++

Cooper noticed it when Blaine hit the eighth grade. It was a little thing, a spark in Blaine’s eye when he came home for Christmas and Kurt’s name came up. It was the shift in his tone when Cooper asked about Blaine’s friend on the phone. It was Blaine texting secretly in the hallway when he had excused himself to the “washroom.” It was the way Blaine blushed when he caught Cooper watching.

When Blaine came out to him that Christmas, Cooper held him as he cried. Cooper held and rocked and whispered that it would be alright, even if he wasn’t so sure himself. He didn’t ask Blaine how he knew, because Cooper had known for so long himself. He didn’t ask if it had to do with Kurt, but he didn’t have to.

“Does anyone else know?”

Blaine sniffed and wiped his nose on his hand before cuddling a pillow up to his chest. “No. Not… not yet. I wanna tell… but not yet.”

Cooper nodded and for once, he didn’t ask the words that sat on his tongue: why me?

The next time Cooper saw Blaine, for a week during summer break, the boy was happier than he had ever seen. His brother was off to high school in the fall, but, most importantly, he was out and happy with who he was.

And, unsurprisingly, so was Kurt.

+++

It’s late. It’s late as fuck and Blaine is supposed to be home and he isn’t.

Okay, maybe it wasn’t that late, but Cooper was covering for his brother and it was the one week of the year that he was actually home and, so sue him, he actually wanted to spend some time with his brother before he left for another year.

Things had been different since Cooper left when Blaine was ten. Cooper had decided that Ohio wasn’t for him, and that he was going to pursue acting because he liked performing and, hey, what could be easier than lying for a living? He did that already. His parents hadn’t been happy, but they dealt with it. It was Blaine that took it hard.

“You’re leaving me?!”

“Bee, I’m not leaving, I’m—“

“It sure sounds like you’re leaving!” Blaine had huffed, his eyes unfamiliar and hard on Cooper’s. His brother was growing up far too fast, and he felt like that had something to do with whatever was happening at school that Blaine refused to mention.

“Look,” Cooper had sighed, running his fingers through his hair. “This is what I have to do, B. Just like you had to take out those books, I have to leave. Okay? But it’s not forever. I’ll be back. Promise.”

It was a promise that yearly was harder and harder to keep.

But he was here now! And Blaine was fifteen and off somewhere mysterious and vague and he promised Cooper he’d be back an hour ago.

After flipping through several terrible night television shows (only stopping to admire his face on television: freecredit.com was a real big deal in Ohio!), Cooper finally sighed and settled on some nineties cartoon that felt vaguely familiar. He found himself chuckling along, albeit quietly as to not wake his father and step-mother.

There was a click at the door, a pause, and then the undeniable noise of a teenage boy trying to sneak into a full house past his curfew. Cooper grinned, turning to face the entrance way, and he waited.

Cooper had expected Blaine to be crouched over, shoulders hunched, as he tip-toed through the house. He expected the unavoidable squeak of floorboards and Blaine to give a startled look when he saw Cooper’s wolfish grin in the glow from the TV. What he actually saw was completely different.

Blaine’s body was straight, but loose; he seemed to be floating. He had this dorky smile on his face, a soft and private one that he seemed unaware of making. His eyes were far away and bright, but active with life, like he was running over and over whatever he had just seen.

“What’s up with you?”

Blaine didn’t jump like Cooper had hoped he would. Instead, he turned swiftly and smiled at Cooper, dazed, as if he couldn’t quite believe it.

“I was with Kurt.”

Cooper snorted. “Yeah, who else would you have been with?”

“No, no. I was with Kurt.”

It took Cooper a moment, and then… “Oh. Oh! Squirt! Why didn’t you tell me?”

Blaine shrugged shyly, his cheek rubbing against his shoulder. “It was… it was the first time we decided to make our weekly dinner like--- you know. And. I don’t know? I didn’t want to jinx it?”

Blaine’s smile stretched wider, and for the first time, Cooper noticed his brother’s lips were pink and raw. “And? How was it?” he asked, even if he thought he already knew the answer.

Blaine sighed dreamily, looking off into some memory Cooper couldn’t see. Instead of speaking, his hands moved quickly, but it didn’t take a genius to figure it out:

I’m in love.

+++

“….and that was how Blaine learned the hard way what a ‘bachelor party’ truly entailed.” The audience laughs and Cooper grins, his eyes catching on an embarrassed Blaine with his face half covered and Kurt beside him, rubbing his back and grinning. Coop winks at Kurt, who signs a quick “you’re killing him” back, before continuing with his speech.

“And today, I got to watch my little brother, Blaine, the little kid who took out a stack of books from the library to learn how to sign hello to the new kid, sign I Do to the man he’s wanted since he was eight. And to Kurt, I just have to say, you’ve got a keeper there. Keep him safe.” Cooper finishes signing and speaking and holds up his glass. He looks over at the happy couple, both of their eyes shining with tears. “To Kurt and Blaine.” Everyone takes a sip and Cooper’s eyes meet Blaine’s. Blaine signs “thank you” and Cooper nods in return.

They say everyone has a soulmate, but only the lucky ones get to find theirs. But Cooper knows that you don’t stumble upon your soulmate; you have to work to find them. You have to ask your big brother to take you to the library, and you have to learn how to speak your soulmate’s language. You have to overcome barriers and diversity, and you’re going to cry and hurt a lot to get to the happiness at the end. Life isn’t easy, and love is the hardest thing of all. Most people find their soulmates, but to stay soulmates is the tricky part.