well, i'm home today because i'm sick. i should be at school because i have rehearsal afterwards, but i'm going to rehearsal anyway, regardless of the fact that i'm technically not allowed. the worst part is though that i have to speak in a really high pitched voice due to the fact that i'm eleven in the show, and my voice is going and i'm having issues getting that high pitch. tea for me for the rest of the week :/
anyway, i've had rehearsal for hours on end for the past couple of days. yesterday though was weird. i found out that i'm actually getting a mic for the show and mr. cullinan is the sound guy. well, throughout the entire run he was talking to me, and it was so weird. i mean, i'm really the only one that was friends with his son that is still in high school. i know he has no idea what went on between evan and i. it was just so different and nice to have it feel like it was theatre last year. last year was so much more fun because of the people, but mr. cullinan, regardless of the fact that his son has graduated, still helps out with the sound for all of the shows. i miss their family a lot. mrs. cullinan, every time i see her, gives me hugs, and i'm pretty much the only kid he still knows, so he's always talking to me. great family. they are so oblivious to me and evan's situation though. i mean, i guess we might be becoming friends, or at least acquaintances, again, so that's good. i don't know,   just being around the family makes me feel very nostalgic. evan's coming to the show saturday, and sheridan's coming to the show sometime during the run, so i'm terrified. it's scary. i'm scared, and i really don't know why.
two days ago lemberg offered me the position of stage manager next year. i wouldn't be acting, but i would be in charge of everything backstage. i would have to make sure everyone knew lines, where they were going, what props go on and off stage and when, etc. it would be a huge responsibility. i'm thinking of taking it, but i don't know how i'll feel giving up acting my senior year. i think it would be an amazing opportunity to be stage manager, but i still can't seem to give up my dream of being in every high school performance the school puts on. i don't know, pretty much my options are: be selfish and act in the shows and the stage manager might suck, or give up acting for the good of the shows and have the stage manager be good. if the stage manager sucks then all the shows will suck. i won't have fun if the shows suck, so i'm leaning towards stage manager very heavily, but i'm still having issues giving up acting for two or three shows. i mean, that doesn't seem like a lot in the scheme of thirteen shows throughout my high school career, but it's still difficult. i mean, he did offer me the position, and that makes me feel honored, but i'm still having issues giving up acting... i don't know what to do...
