#csa stuff

I am having a really hard time telling if these men are actually a threat or if my hypervigilance is getting the best of me.

I'm not sure what to do.

headline is pretty self explanatory! a few weeks ago, i finally told my parents about the abuse that went on with my mom’s ex. they called the police and i went to see a child advocate to talk about it.

i told them in detail on how he would touch me and make me do oral stuff and i cried a lot but it felt nice to let out after so many years of hiding it. three days ago my stepdad got a call on how my rapist/mom’s ex got escorted into a police station and was asked to take a lie detector. he said he’d think about it, but knowing him, he probably won’t take it. the police are giving him a week, but he doesn’t, he goes to prison i suppose. 

I have watched it on television, graphic depictions on shows like 13 Reasons Why and Game of Thrones. I read survivor's stories all the time. Hell, I run a blog that has me thinking about my own experiences in deep detail, has made me realize that my childhood abuse went deeper than I already thought it did, and helped me come to terms with my abuse as an adult.

my brain: you could watch it again