I just had a really messed up dream and now I can't go back to sleep
So, it was more of a nightmare.
It was about my grandfather on my biological father's side dying. Now I promised myself that I'd be there for my grandfather til his death and honestly that's not gonna change.
Because of the drama that went on over at my narcissistic biological father's home, I've been doing well for myself and I've noticed that everytime my grandmother wants to see me I end up crying in school to the point of missing an entire period of class until I've calmed down.
It was so embarrassing when the tears started going and honestly, it was really frustrating.
It was worse living with my narcissistic bio father because my crying situation was ten times worse.
It was to a point where I had to be picked up by my mother and honestly, that was just embarrassing.
What was way more of an embarrassment was when I left my narcissist.
My mom and him were arguing and the stress left me in a flood of tears to a point where a security guard and the freaking principal asked me what was wrong, trying their best to console me. I know they had good intentions, but let's be honest, this is a fight you dont wanna get involved in.
I have never been so happy to be away from a single person in my life. Especially since my narcissist has been doing this for so many years. I'm pretty much done with it.
I guess the stress from last week is still getting to me. I think I need to draw for this very reason.
