#compartmentalizing

Occasion: when you need to compartmentalize to finish your job

I store information. I compartmentalize data and store it for later use. I'm sure most people do this too, but perhaps, I'm realizing, not to the same extent. I compartmentalize into categories and groups.

It goes a little something like...

In this yellow circle, I have my D&D group. They are my D&D group and cannot be my friends.

In this blue circle, I have my friends. I can play D&D with my friends, but they cannot interact with the D&D group.

In this orange box, I have my blood relation family. My BR family can meet my friends, my D&D groups, and any other groups or vice versa. No one from the other groups can enter my BR family, or be heavily involved, save the red diamond group.

In this red diamond, I have my loved ones. There is overlap here from some sections, but the red diamond is special and supercedes all other labels. I would do anything for these people and am always seeking their love and approval, and these people are given the most trust and loyalty I have to offer of all. Red diamond group has earned my martyrdom. It is a small group.

There are more and more groups, so far in that eventually only individuals are within certain colors and shapes. The point still stands, this is how I function. I feel like a bastardization of a person. I feel fake. I feel inhuman. I feel wrong for being dependent on what feels like a programming fetch modus to determine my relationships to others. I do this categorization with food, with pets, with clothes - either they earn a category or I decide I've earned access to the category I've created.