#commandant danglard

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Larry 'Doc' Sportello

from: Inherent Vice (film) type: private investigator

Okay, starting strong with this one. Immensely wet, gay vibe medium, disaster levels through the roof. Highest disaster levels on this list, in fact. It's only gonna go uphill from here. 7/10 bonus points for sick sideburns and saying "groovy"

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Special agent Dale Cooper & sheriff Truman

from: Twin Peaks (tv series) type: fbi agent & sheriff

Classic. Not much disaster or wetness in them tbh. Top tier teamwork. Can argue for gay vibes. 7/10

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Paweł Zawadzki & jr inspector Kędzierski

from: Belfer (tv series) type: literature teacher & cbś officer

wet looks. not together on screen very often, but when they are, the homoeroticism is through the roof. 6/10 would be higher if they had more scenes together. bonus points for Kędzierski roasting everyone he lays eyes upon

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Mikael Blomkvist & Lisbeth Salander

from: Millenium trilogy (books) type: journalist & hacker

low on disaster and wetness scale. no gay vibes emanating from Blomkvist, but Lisbeth is revolutionary lgbtq rep, so it's okay. good teamwork, great dualism theme. 7/10

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March & Healy

from: Nice Guys (film) type: private investigator & muscle for hire

great enemies-to-friends, solid teamwork. gayness questionable, they are the type who wouldn't need gay to marry each other. very wet, strong disaster. 8/10

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Commissaire Adamsberg & Commandant Danglard

from: Adamsberg series (books) type: cops

Two dads. Very sweet, your honor I love them. There's drama, but overall they seem competent. 8/10

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HDB & Lieutenant Kitsuragi

from: Disco Elysium (game) type: cops

Most interesting competent-to-disaster ratio I've ever seen, meaning they work surprisingly well, considering what they're working with. Close proximity to sea and booze ensures high wetness in HDB. Kitsuragi gay in canon. 9/10 bonus points for sick sideburns and saying "disco"

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Jayjay Falcon & Sparrowson Sparrowson

from: Aviary Attorney (visual novel) type: lawyers

19th century French furry lawyers who are also broke. Do I even need to say more? 10/10 Bonus points for Sparrowson eating a piece of evidence and Falcon's literal wetness (he falls into a river). Double bonus points for being able to save your rival and then together you take down king Louis Philippe

eat cold ravioli straight from the can

recite Icelandic poetry

run after a wild boar through a forest at night

feed cat

convert your filing cabinet into a survival cache

infodump

establish what bird species lives in a tower

collect droppings of said birds and use them to protect an old lady in the woods from vipers

overthink

Unfortunately, I don't have a good recollection of the past. I remember there was a boat and it wasn't in a book, but in a canal.

Anyway, I thought I could share funny moments from a book I'm reading right now instead.

Meet the

Serious Crime Squad