#choiceless

Pairing: Severus Snape/Hermione Granger WIP ~ 50k words and growing Warnings for Underage Sex, Graphic Depictions of Violence, manipulation, PTSD

Chapter 14: Trust Is A Blindfold

This is not your average chapter. This is a dance between two control freaks that lose control. There is so much happening in their souls, I cannot pick a single thread to show. It's up to you, dear readers, to deduce.

It's up to you to judge what truly are the motives of their deeds. 

The only thing I can honestly tell you is… Every word is chosen with great care. Every. Single. Word.

Best feeling ever. You fly on the clouds like a little bird, while at the same time there's lava boiling under your skin. You have a vision of Voldemort playing a sadistic game with Severus Snape:

"I don't trust you, you grimy dungeon bat."

"My Lord, I am your loyal servant."

"Prove it to me."

"I'll do anything for your dark majesty."

"Seduce Harry Potter's mudblood pet."

And then darling Sev is like "NO, I WILL NOT DO IT. YOU CANNOT FORCE ME, DUMBLEDORE, I HAVE A RIGHT NOT TO DO THIS!"

And Albus is popping a lemon drop into his mouth. "Put out the flame under your cauldron and stop heralding the end of the world, Severus. It's not like we ask you to gut out a thousand rats. You have both your masters' blessing to take a young and pretty virgin to your bed, and instead of thanking us, you moan and grumble about how unfair it all is and how Lily would disapprove if she was still alive."

And then your brain explodes, because you need need need need to put this into writing. But the thing is, you have two more stories half-posted and waiting patiently to be finished, while behind your back, one of your shortfics has birthed a whole sequel about destroying Horcruxes. How can you refuse an Albus/OFC story where they destroy horcruxes, I mean, come on.

And yet, your first Snamione beckons you invitingly.... You cannot refuse, not when you are finally writing something that people other than you seem to find interesting :''3

You've never written Snamione before, and now you have a somewhat interesting premise. You've posted the first chapter, you get lots of positive feedback, Severus and Hermione get stuck in your mind, dancing a frenzy waltz all over your synapses.

You have a plot for the Snamione now. It's a tight plot; it feels like a good plot. You play with it for a while, as if you're letting the characters decide. You say, if one of them feels they don't want to proceed with this, I will not write a second chapter. I will leave the one I posted as it is, to remain forever a lonely little one-shot, a spinster on the figurative shelf, the poor dear.

I started writing fics to help me cope with my anxiety. I thought it would be soothing, relaxing, not unlike a mother's embrace that always shelters you from the evils of the world.

Three years later, relaxed is NOT how I feel.

Come join me in Ao3, to read all about Severus' latest ordeal!! How will he proceed with this peculiar task? And how about Hermione, his intended victim? What has she to say for herself?