#character studies

Tyger! Tyger!

No, don't stop me. I'm gonna say it...

I genuinely enjoy Raphael.

There.

Like, do you understand how easily he could become a caricature? Devils are so overdone in modern media in the worst way. Their entire schtick is that evil is attractive because of its very forbidden nature. So devils are portrayed as conventionally attractive-- Hello, Tom Ellis.

And while Raphael is undeniably charming, he has features I would consider an acquired taste. He's not overtly flashy in his clothing choice as a human. He's theatrical, yes. Dramatic, most assuredly. And yet, not as over the top as Astarion, I would deign to venture.

But when you start reading his diaries and notes and bits he intended for his eyes only and quickly realize- it's not an act! He genuinely believes in these things. He honest to gods speaks the same way in his internal monologue. He honestly believes he is that mf.

My favorite were the corrupting of Hope scrolls. And keep in mind, her sister Korilla was the one writing these down. She sat there through all of it. The coaxing. The dirty limericks. Gods, how fucking awkward...to be the fly on those impeccably detailed walls.

And despite all of his peacocking, he's really quite subdued about it at times. Like the chess match with Mol. That genuinely startled me to come around the corner at the Last Light and find him there with her. I have never felt my mom senses triggered harder by a game. I immediately wanted to be like "No. Get away from him." Because it's like, "Yeah, as an adult, I can find your attempts to corrupt me laughable because I know what I'm about, but the minute you start making deals with children? Now I'm not laughing anymore. Now the wizard's gonna have to get involved so that the bard doesn't burn the inn down."

And yet, he's the one that 'saved' her when she got kidnapped.

What is your game, devil? What are you playing at? Because you know I can't honestly let you keep her contract and yet you've not actually acted against my interests. In fact, to an extent, they're rather aligned. And he helped Astarion with his scars. What, out of the goodness of his black heart? And still, his charity does have a limit...

And playing as a bard, I'm not above a bit of my own deception. I think it's to be expected when the fate of the world is on the line. (I'm not a bloody Paladin, for Gith's sake.) But while he withholds information sometimes for his own ends, he's always honest if you're direct with him.

Absolutely fascinating.

A little character study I just had to do for this months Patreon shorts.

Gabriel: Pen does not like Gabriel at all. We are talking hate of the purest kind. I'm pretty certain this is a somewhat unfair opinion because it started long ago. Pen does not like individuals who hide behind religion or use it to justify their own set of rules. Gabriel thinks in too big of strokes without understanding harm or consequences because it's all part of the Knowing's design. Pen often encourages Night to do better in love. That they deserve better. They refuse to sit down to dinner with Gabriel.

Belladonna: Pen loves her. Worships the ground she walks on. Think that Night is the shit because they were able to pull a woman like Bella. Would be up for a threesome but also would listen to anything that Night has to say about Bella. Outside of that, Pen does really respect Belladonna's attitude towards life and death and how she handles it. It is respectful in a way that Pen enjoys and thinks that it is a good balance to Night. Pen also finds it refreshing that a being of death loves life as much as Bella does.

Milo: Pen kind of nothing's Milo. Half the time Pen forgets that Milo even exists until he does something stupid and Pen has to go and deal with it. Death entities and fae entities kind of just stay away from each other. Not out of fear but almost like their essence repels each other. As for Milo being with Night, Pen thinks it is a little funny. Mostly because they think Milo is more of a pet than anything else.

Hazel: Pen is wary of Hazel. Sweetness is normally something that attracts Pen to others but there is a stickiness under Hazel's sweetness that Pen finds both addicting and terrifying. Pen believes that if Night were to truly die, it could be by Hazel's hands. So, while Pen plays nice and they love conversations with Hazel, they also would sleep with one eye open and check up on Night a lot just to make sure that everything is on the up and up.

Malcolm: Night likes Malcolm. They want to be friends with Mal despite Mal not really wanting to be friends with them. Pen feels a bit more connected to Malcolm because they did have to reap him twice at this point and they know they are eventually going to have to do it again. I think there's a part of Pen that feels sad when they see Mal and then the other part recognizes another old soul. Old souls are safer, in Pen's mind. So they are okay with Night being with Mal but they know its going to hurt when they have to take Mal away from them.

If you want to read more on Pen this month, join Patreon. Also, there is a significant percent off of your purchase if you choose to join for the year.

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Hiiii so recently Ive come down with the terrible curse of a hyperfixation on TOH and because of my stupid teen brain I've clung to Hunter!!!

Soo here are 3 fics I wrote that maybe you'd be interested in!! Yay,, Also like be aware that each fic deals with a variety of self hate and are alll pretty angsty lmao

Lasting Affects - Instead of just getting the teleport powers from flapjack Hunter also got some apendages,, tldr wing fic!!

Mask of Honor - When his whole world is crushed and restructured it takes Hunter a second to realize that not everyone is out to get him.

I had to do some character studies for coursework, figured I'd share them here! ^-^

YES YES YES!!! i LOVE talking about them.

You can find a full lore dump of Post and Fence's backstory here, so I'll yap more about the meaning of the artwork itself here :))

First off it's actually a redraw of this old piece I did as a warmup; Post is the one with the slit pupils, Fence is the one with the mushroom eye :)

its based off this work from Mcgx Archive, which in turn i believe is based off a poem? i love her work though check her out

A lot of Fence's arc during the campaign has been about the consequences of her repressing her emotions so deeply, and realizing how it impacts the people she cares about. The most obvious example is the most recent, where she was told Post was most likely dead after a ritual gone wrong and had practically no reaction other than laser focus on the next quest line, and her now brushing off the party trying to comfort her, which has started causing a rift between her and the others.

One of the main things she has yet to unpack is her self hatred and anger at her circumstances and the things that have led her here, especially her mother. She believes any show of emotion is weak, and that feeling anger towards the people who have wronged her is a sign of a lack of self control.

The line "All this anger used to be love" is directed at Post, and the way her admiration towards him has turned into a grudge for ruining the illusion of love she had in the village by burning it down, as well as having him as a constant reminder of what she lost. It also can be read as the way that her feelings have changed towards that 'guidance' her mom gave her in childhood.

Now Post is pretty much the opposite. His whole life he was stereotyped as the angry troubled kid, which pushed him further into his bitterness towards others. This was only aided by his exile.

As he's grown up he's become a lot more confident in himself, and learned to show his affection for people without shame, even if it's in more unconventional ways. He's broken down the gaslighting and brainwashing from his time in the village, and become a healthier person for it.

"All this love used to be anger" is directed at Fence, and how his childhood jealousy and rueben instinct towards has for being the favorite has grown into him genuinely loving and caring for her, and wanting to watch her grow into her own person.

It's a bit of a role reversal as well, since both siblings purposefully put up a mask of a surface level caricature of an dnd trope. Post is the red-coded deceitful cultist with a short temper who's actively hostile to outsiders, and Fence is the quiet green-coded healer who always keeps a level head and helps her party members in times of stress.