#chaos leverage

Quinn asking ‘can I hit him’ & Eliot being like see the little brother is annoying hahaha

1: Wil Wheaton exists, and he just happens to look weirdly similar to Chaos

Also he makes a funny Santa.

dean is literally so angry that kate and colin have codenames or whatever. he expects gert to back him up but she’s all, “i mean, arsenic.”

kate obviously high fives her after that

kate and gert are so so physically affectionate with one another they are constantly next to one another with their arms around each other

“are you SURE you don’t have a codename???”

Dean admits he’s been called the righteous man and kate and gert immediately veto this

Chaos’ suggestion of “muscle guy” is NOT HELPFUL

this cluster has so much drama for only four people. this means they were birthed by either Lito or Wolfgang

if it’s Wolfgang they all get together and sing 99 red balloons to him on his birthday. nomi hacks a camera somewhere so they can all watch it

NOMI AND CHAOS HACK OFF

if it’s Lito we all know Dean is a fanboy

they all visit dean when he’s working on the car and the rest of them become the greek chorus in hercules (honey you mean HUNKules)

they find out about Derek and people coming to kill the Hawkeyes and all three of them are like “do you want us to kill that guy for you? because we will totally kill that guy for you”

chaos: what the FUCK do you mean your ex boyfriend has a spaceship

chaos; WHAT the FUCK do you mean you know tony stark

kate: dean i just found out you’re a serial killer, would you like to explain that?

gert, very tired, just wants to sleep: he kills cereal?

dean: gert has a DINOSAUR how have we moved past that???

Kate: uh her dinosaur didn't film themself brutally murdering a bunch of people??? Sir????

Dean: it was a shapeshifter who just looked like me, okay? It happens a lot

Kate: oh okay that makes sense

Cha0s: that makes SENSE???

kate and gert get mad about dean’s music purist attitude and spend a full 24 hours making him listen to the best of boybands, mid 2010s pop, Taylor Swift and Carly Rae Jepson, Gay Music, and of course Britney. 

a full 24 hours

he can’t even be that mad because Gert and Kate are having so much fun. there’s a lot of dancing

chaos requests that they take a break, he does not want them to be like those people who danced until they died in france

a story NONE of them have heard so then it becomes horrific history time with chaos

and like. you know that smile he gets in the last dam job where hardison is like “this must be how eliot feels all the time” its very smug he has that look the whole time. he pivots right into a story about the radium girls. the other three are sitting at his feet rapt, eating popcorn. dean wants to see if they haunt the watch factory but then?? how to deal with their radioactive remains????

i don’t know if chaos is with mr quinn, or if being in a cluster with dean provides the impetus for him getting with quinn i just know that there are a lot of bisexual awakenings happening

and some VERY genderqueer dean happening

i hmmm think chaos is slightly touch-averse, while dean is touch-starved, 

kate and dean will wake each other up with nightmares and do a visit-cuddle to go back to sleep. sometimes gert wakes up and joins them. and if gert wakes up, chaos will wake up and grudgingly also get into the cluster cuddle. whoever is next to him will usually link pinkies with him

chaos is very good at painting nails

kate and/or dean will do a Thing and gert and chaos give each other looks like, they are so so dumb

“i’m not dumb!”

NO BUT YOU DO DUMB THINGS

They have zero impulse control

You know what I realized who is missing from this cluster

It's Jason Todd obviously

For some reason involving his helmet he is able to hide himself from the cluster

Like he's a weird shadowy figure and they can't figure out where or who he is

He reveals himself so reluctantly it's insulting

Chaos is mad because it's ANOTHER FUCKING MUSCLE GUY

Gert is mad because he's a crime lord or something???

Dean is mad because Jason is VERY attractive and also came back from the dead, which is Dean's thing thank you very much?????

And Kate is mad because she grew up with Jason, she went to his funeral, it was OPEN CASKET what the fucking fuck you fuckhole????????

Each guy, looking at the other two: holy shit am I into dudes?

Chaos makes memes of Kate in the style of Doge and then she starts talking in doge-speak

Such muscle. Very dinosaur. Amaze.

"Chaos help me steal music off the internet"

"What's a torrent is that like a current."

"Is Napster still a thing?"

Chaos: internal screaming

Jason: so can you help me hide thos money offshore or what

Jason: so are you going to help me steal from Elon Musk or what

For some reason they all go to visit Lito, probably related to Whispers

Jason, Chaos, and Kate argue over who is getting the plane tickets

Kate: Jason that is crime money we can't use it

Jason: oh sorry where did your money come from again? Stolen circus money or ill gotten heiress funds?

Chaos: why would we pay?????

Because Chaos has already hacked into 3 major airlines and gotten them staggered tickets because that's just being safe

Also this is funny because Sam Winchester now has four more overprotective sibling-parents