#carirae

Where does all the pain go?

I wonder if it ever leaves the vessel

Which ceaselessly houses and feeds it

Allowing it to act out 

In vain and vengeance

Nurturing and coveting it 

Like a precious stone

Which could be used

In a war

Against the Self

At any moment

Should an opportunity arise.

And where does all the fear go?

I wonder if the well will ever run empty

Which creates dramas and scenarios 

Allowing it to run amok

In panic and disorder

Feeding off and worshiping it

Like some messiah 

Which would deliver us

In a war

Against the Self

At any moment

Should an opportunity arise.

Where does all the joy go?

I wonder if anybody can hear them

Who sing in our ears and raise us up

Allowing us to feel beyond 

In love and wonder

Supporting and encouraging us

Like children of an inheritance

Who could reclaim Heaven

In a war

Against the Self

At any moment

Should an opportunity arise. 

And where does all the courage go?

I wonder if anybody can see themselves 

Who stare in the mirror back at them

Allowing the soul to be visceral

In intensity and presence 

Conjuring and inspiring the work

Like a spirit guide

Who rallies his allies

In a war

Against the Self

At any moment

The kind of man

Who comes to me

Won’t be on the back of a horse

A true king delights in nature

But wishes not to possess it

To destroy it

To attach to it.

The kind of man 

Who sings to me

Won’t use words he doesn’t understand

A true artist delights in discovery

Uses creation itself to create

To walk the path

To inspire.

The kind of man

Who touches me

Won’t do so without his entire being

A true lover delights in connection

Without fear or hesitation

To direct himself 

To return to himself.

The kind of man 

Who shares with me

Won’t covet any of our possessions 

A true wiseman knows impermanence 

Rejoices in his relationship

To everything

To nothing.

The kind of man 

Who supports me

Won’t be threatened by my divinity

True power delights in infinite power

Marvels at its original beauty

To be close to it

To kindle it.

The kind of man

Who protects me

Won’t stand in the way of my own strength

True valor delights in growth and freedom

Nurtures it with great care

To remind himself

To have faith.

The kind of man 

Who prays for me

Won’t ask for anything but my beingness to shine 

True love delights in authenticity 

Is not bothered by its jagged lines

To watch it unveil

To keep an open heart.

The kind of man

Who seeks me 

Won’t be bothered by the work 

True mirrors delight in clarity

Appreciate the calmness of still water

To share a life

To tend to seeds.

The kind of man 

Who loves me

Won’t just see me through himself

True partners delight in being individuals

Choose to compliment one another

To live their truth

To reach their goal.

This kind of man

He doesn’t search

He knows I’m there

Within his heart

Coming to bloom

With perfect timing

Great care to detail

And every quality

Reflected in him

Oh, my darling morning sun

You smile upon my face

I feel you wanting to say more

My toes look for your grace

I know I didn’t have an ear

The days or two before

But now I’m lying wide awake

And wanting for your lore

Oh, my darling morning sun

So benevolent and consuming

How your breath it frightens me

Setting things for blooming

But the line between love and fear

Is so narrow when you’re near

And the same when you’re afar

My beloved life giving star,

fixed in my imagination.

Oh, my darling morning sun

When you whisper all your secrets

I feel my skin begin to dance

My mind is locked within your trance

Here nothing can harm me

And we laugh together

Knowing we will meet again,

And again.

Oh, my darling morning sun

I know you’ll have to go

The afternoon will beckon you

From hanging here so low

And when you climb your highest

I will watch your greatest work

Safely wrapped in dancing leaves

Sell me something

I want to buy

You know that look

Where can I get high?

The quiet is maddening

I need pretty lights

To keep me enchanted

All through the dark night

So tell me your story

Appeal to my heart

A doe-eyed consumer

To be torn apart

The tune of emotion

To drown out the sound

Come take a seat

And you will be found!

The lost little souls

All looking for safety

We’ll have them walk tall

While eating insecurity

The show must go on

We pivot with you

So tell me your story!

And how do you do?

The headlines are written

We know what you need

A cold-hard confession

A new beauty queen

Nothing is secret

No, nothing is sacred

Only bought and sold

For printing more paper

So tell me your story!

We never run out

A brand-new identity

There’s never a doubt

What is it you’re thinking?

We’ll give you a clue

With pictures and words

And videos too!

You’ll never be guessing

About how you feel

We’ve got you covered

A spin of the wheel

And all of the music

Will reach to your soul

So tell me your story -

Relinquish control!

A story to write

A story to read

A story to sell

Oh, my flighty butterfly

Vibrating in the dark

Can’t make much sense of what’s outside

Yet, you have left your mark.

The trees can see your efforts

Waiting patiently for Spring

The wind does listen softly

For the weeping of the king.

Your death seems quite unpleasant

From this form you grew to love

You try to bravely sacrifice

While reaching high above.

The bend and stretch is taxing

While reserves are often low

The air provides no comfort

For it knows you have to grow.

The world, it craves your masterpiece

While waiting deep inside

The snow is hiding treasures

Set for those who seek to find -

Those answers to the questions

That there are no answers for -

The ones who know what lies beyond

This crooked, lock’ed, door.

Oh, my flighty butterfly

Your fear is not in vain

For nothing can be greater

Than transcendence of your pain!

The joy that you will carry

On your wings in this new place

Will help remind the rest of us

To stay with keeping pace.

Your shining crown is waiting

Just beyond the other side

Don’t you give up your practice

Just because you have to hide.

Nature is just playing

With your weakest little spots

Ensuring that you’re able

I want to share this thing I see

with anyone who wants to be

another version of the person

they’ve been sold they’re

to believe

they are,

they were,

they will become

when it all feels a little numb

and little voices in their head

start queuing up another drum.

You'll know the feeling very well

because the signs & symptoms tell

you that what you have learned

does not hold up

to satisfy

your wants,

your needs,

the endless void

that sits so deep within your heart

it causes pain you can’t explain

away when you pull it apart.

The missing piece is never lost

but searching high and low will cost

some precious time and energy

that could perhaps be better spent

to love

your self,

your health,

the opportunity

to take responsibility

for being human - being here

and now with this ability.

Its implicit beauty (and yours too)

is what I want to share with you

so that you can begin to see

what seems to be important

when you focus your

attention,

energy,

and efforts

into the soup of consciousness

that makes this matrix dance & sing

eternal songs of endless bliss.

But you don’t have to look so far

inside to find that you’re a star

quite literally and burning ultra-light

waves full of endless love’s

deafening vibration -

the sound,

the sense,

the notion that

it’s always been there waiting

for your eyes to close, so your eye could open

and show you how god is creating.

I want to watch the stage play

out with every bit of every day

with you, with our eyes shut so

we can see how absolutely

magnificent

it is,

it was,

it will become

as it unfolds under the sun

and moon and feel the gratitude

I wonder what will happen

To the future that is me

What gifts I will have gotten

And the way I’ll learn to be

What songs will be unwritten

In the choosing of a key

Which I find suits me better

And the eyes I’ll use to see

The moments all unfolding

As they happen in real time

And sharpen my perception

’Til I find the world in line

With every single symbol

And a meaning well defined

For tossing into oceans

As I gaze upon a tide

Knowing this is fleeting

Plucking moments to collect

Forgetting I am leading

From this one into the next

Aligning all my chakras

Trying to pay cosmic debts

What stories will be whispered

While I sleep in the unrest

Of every crying infant

Learning how to beat her drum

The dance of joy and suffering

Both sucking on a thumb

What clouds will bring in clarity

A soft, familiar hum

To constantly remind me

Never to pay up the sum

Sought with some enchantment

Upon seeking through my eyes

When the heart is overflowing

Every morning at sunrise

What light I’ll choose to bathe in

Paper-cut out from the lies

While all the world is searching

For the next most precious prize