#bug stings

In order here's Wednesday, Thursday, and Friday (today)

But stranger things have happened, I guess. Later that day I noticed a tender spot on my ass, like a grossly inflamed pimple was developing. I didn’t think much of it until the following day, yesterday. It felt like it was starting to blister so wtf, that’s concerning, I got a good look at the area. There was a large golf-ball sized welt on my ass, and it was indeed starting to blister. Fucking gnarly.

Now, I’m a reasonable person and I’ve studied bugs (esp. spiders) since childhood, so I’m always the last person to assume something is a spider bite. Spiders don’t want to bite unless they absolutely have to, yo. But this looks like a spider bite, feels like a spider bite, and my puffy eyelids and face were clearly an allergic reaction to the venom, whatever it was from. The day prior to the morning face swelling I had been moving things around the greenhouse and disturbing every square inch. Unfortunately black widows are always present in there, and I knocked down a few old webs in the process.

That’s not to say it’s a black widow bite, but it could be and I’d just like to take this opportunity to point out that black widow bites aren’t as big of a deal as most people seem to think they are. Seriously! Look it up. :p Fatalities are sooo rare and generally only happen if you’re super fucking young, super fucking old, or super fucking sickly. Anyway, I was thinking back to that day, and I think I know when it happened. I felt a prick not long after leaving the greenhouse, but I assumed it was just a wood splinter or something similar stuck in my pants. I’m just a bit confused if that was indeed when I was bitten because I didn’t feel anything crawling on me so it’s safe to assume it was on the outside of my pants, not caught on the inside; so whyyyyy would it bite me if it wasn’t trapped? Oh well. We also have an abundance of yellow sac spiders whose bite could cause a similar welt and blister effect, and I’ve noticed a great deal of wasps and bees lately, but I’m not terribly familiar with their stings. (edit: I just looked it up and it looks like a bee sting can look very similar to a spider bite, even with the blistering so I’m done speculating on the culprit now. WHO KNOWS. My ass hurts.)

The area is more inflamed today and slightly larger, but I’m not having any abdominal pain or nausea. I felt a little feverish the last couple of nights and again right now, but it only seems to happen at night. I’ve been feeling stupidly sore and weak which could be spider bite symptoms or could be a result of pushing myself a little too hard in my workouts. I’ve also felt incredibly anxious and I guess “off” is the best way I can describe it, which coincide with the other bite symptoms. I seriously don’t know if the weakness and mental changes are a result of the bite or if I’m just having another “down” in the ebb and flow of my mental health. It’s really hard to say, rofl.

Anyway, I survived the allergic reaction and hopefully the symptoms won’t get any worse and the bite won’t get infected. I don’t have health insurance until july. I can’t afford this shit. 😂

I’m taking a break from holding myself accountable for the next few days because I feel absolutely drained and dead. I’ve been forcing myself to walk a bit but I couldn’t even bring myself to do yoga last night because my lower half feels so weak. I did a lot of upper arm work with my dumbbells last night and I think I’ll just do the same tonight and give my lower half some time to recover.