#bruhal

Bruce and Hal like each other, okay? They're each funny! And okay, Bruce is handsome, smells nice, a gentleman... so maybe Hal is freakishly in love.

One thing Bruce consistently talks about is his babies. That man loves his babies so much. Hal respects that Bruce can never show him pictures, but his descriptions of the kids paint a really sweet image of Bruce's "civilian" family

"My eldest, Dick! Oh yes, he just mastered a new technique with his gymnastics class! He's very proud of it! And my daughter, Cass, is cast for a solo in her next ballet, I'm so excited to see it. Tim loves the new videogame you suggested for his console, he just can't leave it! Damian thinks the shirt you gave me was nice. Oh, and I cannot forget mentioning my Jason! Yes! My little boy was so clingy today. He won't let me leave to go on this date! He's sick as of last night. Oh, my poor baby..."

Hal is so sick with cuteness aggression, so when things get serious between Bruce and him, he insists that he MUST meet his kids.

Well...

He did not expect Nightwing to drop hell on him, like full on knee-drop from the stratosphere. His name is Dick Grayson, and he is part of a gymnastics class!!!...... as the teacher.

And Cass is, in fact, a ballet student.... THE SENIORS DANCE COMPANY..... she is also batgirl and she's the few creatures to remind Hal of what fear is.

Tim is Red Robin, and yes he thanked Hal personally for the videogame suggestion, before promptly threatening to castrate Hal if he ever breaks his dad's heart.

Damian was ALMOST forgivable. He's very much baby-sized. But he's also Robin and an Al-Ghul and Bruce get your child away from me he's threatening to duel me for your hand- STOP LAUGHING.

Jason? Jason is the worst. Bruce made him out to be this clingy, soppy wet cat of a child that cries when left alone too long and whose biggest problems is crusts on the sides of his plate. Turns out he's the Red Hood and also 6"5 and built like a barn. He also has dry humor. And guns. Lots of it.

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Hal: You said you had 5 babies???

Bruce: Yes, 5 babies 😊

Hal: [staring at the 5 miscellaneous death threat notes he got from the trained operatives that are his boyfriend's attack dogs]

Bruce: Aww, they made you love cards! 🥹

Hal: One of this is from Dick. He says to remember to lock my door, just in case....

Bruce: He's feeling protective! 🥰

Dick lifts his head from the bars of his cage, squinting at the door as the screeching sound of tearing metal ricochets through the hull, and the ship they're captive on trembles with the might of the attack.

"Please tell me we aren't about to get kidnapped from our kidnapper," Tim groans.

"Great."

"Get ready, guys," Dick warns, standing. "This'll be our best shot at escape."

Or it would be, if anything happened. Instead, they're just left standing there like fools as the ship trembles and distant yelling gradually gets less distant.

Dick doesn't relax out of his stance, but he's tempted. Only, as soon as you do that, it always—

The doors burst open, and two aliens scurry in, antenna pressed low to their heads in obvious fear. Based on the panels on their robes Dick is fairly sure these are the captains, so what the hell is out there to send two of space's most respected pirates running?

"We ransom them," one suggests, using Damian's cage like a shield. "Sell them to buy our freedom."

"Threaten to kill them if he doesn't comply," the other suggests. Dick's translator croaks out it's last words, then dies as they keep arguing. His was the last one standing, after they shorted out the others trying to hotwire a beacon to Bruce a few hours ago, arguing all the while about who has to tell Bruce they were stupid enough for space pirates to get ahold of them and all of the League tech they also had on board.

It wasn't Dick's fault, that's all that matters, no matter what Cass says.

The pirates are still arguing, high, panicked, buzzing words rushing out by them both, until they go suddenly, damningly silent.

Dick glances at the door and slips back into that battle-ready pose.

The lights flicker overhead.

The walls tremble.

Someone whispers a prayer.

The door blows off its hinges, and the glass rains down on them as the bulbs overhead explode, plunging them into darkness.

A sickly, glowing green creeps around the corner, and Dick falls out of his stance in shock. Hal Jordan steps into the room, face set firmly into an expression Dick has never seen before on his face as he glowers at the aliens cowering behind their cages.

The whites of his domino crawl over them all, and eventually land at the galaxy-feared pirates reduced to snivelling messes. One of them points their sword at Cass through the bars, which she stares at impassively, and more buzzing words are hissed at Hal.

He stares back.

A construct snaps out, grabbing the sword, snapping it in two. More shoot out, grabbing that alien, and the other as it raised its weapon at Damian. Hal lifts them both into the air, and starts lecturing them in their own language, buzzes and clicks spat in a furious snarl, surpassing was Dick seemingly mistaked for the limits of human vocal cords to speak the alien tongue.

The constructs tighten, Dick wonders if the bug-like creatures are supposed to turn that colour, and are suddenly released, falling to the ground in a heap. Hal snarls one last thing, then crosses his arms and waits.

He's floating off the floor slightly, toes tipped down to it as if on pointe, arms crossed over his chest. His costume thrums with energy, a blinding green illuminating the room as he supervises the aliens move to their cages, face severe and unforgiving as he watches over them.

Dick has seen Hal Jordan in action before.

Seemingly, he's never seen Green Lantern in action before.

Dick warily steps past the alien as his cage door swings open. Cass pulls up beside him, a smirk on her face, and now they're free Dick knows it's a race to get to Bruce and blame this fiasco on someone else first.

It was not Dick's fault.

"We apologise," one simpers in English, a hand shuggling Damian out of his cage. "We did not know you were the children of Green Lantern Hal Jordan."

Dick glances at Hal, expecting a terse denial, a reassertion of his role as a space cop. He does not expect his eyes to darken, narrowing at the alien.

"And what?" He asks carefully. "If they weren't my children, that would be okay? They are kids, you think you can just snatch them from their home? They're not some commodity you stole from a Hub, you want to take them from home? To keep them away from family?"

"Apologies, Lantern Jordan," the other says, unlocking Tim's cage. Hal seems to settle, barely, watching over everything with a stern gaze.

Tim steps past his alien, and seemingly breathes in a bit of the dust that sits on this species' hard shell. He goes red, his cheeks puff, Dick grins, Jason snorts, and Tim gives up on his dignity, allowing a singular massive cough to tear out of his chest.

Dick muffles a laugh. Damian does not.

The room seems to darken even more, and he realises maybe it's not funny. Hal looks apopleptic, and starts tearing into the aliens all over again, leaving them out of the loop this time as they return to that hissing, buzzing, clicking language that is surely making the lecture sound more threatening than it is...right? Hal's not that stressed about them.

The aliens scurry out of the room, and Hal turns to them, feet finally touching down on the floor, the furrow in his brow smoothing out as he looks at them.

"Sorry it took me so long to get here," he says, and Dick's own brow dips. They haven't even been captive for five hours. Considering they're in space, it is a pretty quick rescue. "You kids are okay, right?"

"We're fine, Harold," Damian sniffs, pride bruised.

Hal's eyes don't leave them, and Cass suddenly slips forward, moving to him. Over her shoulder, she calls to them, and then they're all moving.

"Huh? What is a Code-FN? Do I— oh..." Hal trails off as Cass tucks herself under his arm, wrapping her arms around him. Damian takes his other side, pressing in close, and the rest of them fill in around.

Dick invented the code for Bruce.

If Hal needs it, Hal needs it.

That's all there is too it.

"Was so worried," he breathes, sagging, and lips find their way to Tim's head, ghosting over his hair. Dick smiles as he flushes bright red.

"We're safe," he assures, rather than tease his brother. "No harm done."

"The hell there wasn't." Hal's voice sharpens again, cutting. "The Lanterns next sector are in so much shit for letting these guys through the markers, making them my problem." He devolves into venemous mutterings, and Dick presses his lips together to not smile.

Three hours later, those same threats are being shouted at the big screen in the Watchtower, three very sheepish Green Lanterns getting the lecture of a lifetime from Hal. Off to the side, Dick chows down on the Batburger order Hal rattled off to a very concerned Bruce, who met them on the Watchtower with it and a plethora of hugs.

Now he's sat next to Dick, his milkshake hanging loosely from his hand as he watches Hal rant. Dick does not like that expression. Yuck. Yuck yuck yuck, he—

"Bruce, your milkshake is melting," he says, hoping to draw his attention away. "Bruce? Bruce."

"Dick," Bruce hums, tone uncomfortably breathy. "How do you feel about another sibling?"

Dick baulks.

Hal turns around from the monitors and throws Bruce a smirk and a wink before going back to shouting.

Bruce sighs into his milkshake, a blush settling onto his cheeks.