Dear Vector Prime, I recently saw the Super Mario Bros movie and, I couldn't help but wonder, have Transformers ever visited the Mushroom Kingdom?
Dear Mushroom Master,
Indeed they have! You may recall the Maximal starship Dianosk and its many deep-space colonization missionsâhere is the story of one such adventureâŚ
Several solar cycles after departing Starbase Rugby with a fresh complement of thirty protoforms, the four-man crew of the starship Dianoskâconsisting of captain Updraft, engineer Ratchet, security officer Regulator, and ensign Brakelineâarrived at a red planet somewhere on the spinward edge of the galaxy. While the planet Dykayra had been known to Cybertronian astronomers for some time, no Transformer had set foot on the planet since before the Great War, many millions of stellar cycles ago.
Although the Dianosk picked up no signs of extant intelligent life, orbital scans picked up vast forests of skyscraper-sized mushrooms, whose toxic spore clouds would choke out any organic lifeform in nanokliks. More intriguingly, their sensors detected rich veins of subterranean energon, as well as signs of extensive prior habitationâthe tips of ancient, crumbling towers poked up through the red fungal canopy, while abandoned maglev lines and crumbling superhighways criss-crossed the planet. Intrigued at the prospect of discovering a lost civilization, Updraft ordered his crew to land their ship in an abandoned spaceport; to better explore the planetâs treacherous, fungus-based ecosystem, he decided to activate a protoform to assist them in their endeavors, whose native alternate mode would allow him to better explore the terrain. The scanning process yielded FunGus, a gregarious young Transformer whose unusual mycelium alternate form allowed him to easily navigate the planetâs terrain.
The five-man exploration team established a temporary command post as a beachhead for further exploration of the city. As they picked through the detritus, the team uncovered many strange clues regarding the planetâs prior inhabitantsâgarments they surmised to be hazard suits of some kind, and an abandoned botanical research lab where dozens of brightly colored mushrooms had long ago burst from their holding tanksâperhaps, they surmised, the source of many of the strange, colorful mushrooms that seemed to form the ecosystemâs primary basis. Before the team could report back to Updraft, however, they were attacked by dozens of strange, humanoid fungi! Although the creatures only wielded crude melee weapons fashioned from old lead pipes and rusted nails, they were numerous, and difficult to deterâworse yet, amidst the chaos, FunGus abruptly turned on his crewmates! The terrified crew dragged the wounded Brakeline to safety, even as FunGus escaped into the overgrown sewers beneath the city along with their attackers.
Unsuited as they were to trekking through the dangerous fungal jungle, it took several more solar cycles before the rest of the team could locate their escaped ensign; when they did find him, it was in a series of abandoned catacombs, where a network of glowing tendrils connected him and hundreds of other fungus-creatures to an enormous, building sized fungus. As one, the aliens moved in on the Cybertronian explorers⌠but, before the encounter could descend into violence, FunGus announced that Queen Mycellium, ruler of their collective, had chosen him to serve as her mouthpiece. Millennia ago, she explained, their race began as parasites: a freak lab accident created a race of aggressive spore-based lifeforms who reproduced through unwilling hosts, until they and their progeny had choked out everything else on the planet, including the original civilization responsible for creating them. In the intervening years, however, they had attempted to move past their ignoble beginnings, and her collective hopefully marked the beginning of a new era of peace and understanding. She and her minions had mistaken FunGus for a wayward member of her own tribe, and attempted to âliberateâ him from what she perceived to be alien captors; their unique form of spore-based communication had accidentally driven FunGus into a frenzy.
Fortunately for all involved, Updraft was able to settle the matter agreeably, and the planetary monarch graciously accepted his request to establish a research base and Energon mining outpost on the planetary surface. When Updraft and his crew left for their next adventure, FunGus remained behind to further map the planet and act as a kind of ambassador between the two species, ready to welcome further waves of Cybertronian colonists to this unique planet.
















