#boycotttosiri

Many of our followers will remember that several months ago, To Siri With Love was published. This book was extremely ableist, and included the author, Judith Newman, describing her desire to sterilize her autistic son. When the book was published, the autistic community called for a boycott of this book using the hashtag #BoycottToSiri. 

Unfortunately, we find ourselves in a similar situation again. A new Autism Mom book, Autism Uncensored, is set to be released next month by Koehler Publishing. This book was written by the author of a Washington Post article written a few days ago, in which Autism Mom Whitney Ellenby details how she deliberately traumatized her autistic son in order to make it easier for him to go out in public. When confronted by autistic advocates who tried to confront her ableism, Ellenby responded extremely negatively. 

You, like myself, may have heard a buzz about autistic people boycotting the recently-published nonfiction novel To Siri With Love. Seeing the controversy surrounding this publication, I decided to take a short break from my university assignments and do a little research for myself about the book and the issues it raises, hoping to be able to explain in short why the #BoycottToSiri movement is so important to the autistic community. The book is a memoir written by Judith Newman about her experiences with her autistic son, Gus. That alone is not a bad concept, but some of the comments the author makes send nasty shivers down my spine. To start with, here’s some of the smaller problems that were discovered:

The author did not ask her teenage son’s permission or advice when writing an invasive commentary on his life, a choice she views as “selfish but necessary.” She also published text conversations between Gus and his friends. Though I cannot claim to know whether or not anyone involved consented to have their words published, it is difficult to overlook the possibility that they did not.

Transphobic comments regarding the use of the terms “cisgender” and “they” (as opposed to “he or she”) to be an “ugly and imprecise” evolution of language. Also, I there’s something that rubs me the wrong way about her insistence on using “the masculine pronoun” when “talking about people in generalities”, but I can’t pinpoint exactly what it is that makes me feel so uneasy about that.

Newman described popular autism advocate Amythest Schaber using a sexist movie trope by saying that they resemble “everyone’s favourite manic pixie dream girl.”

Made the ableist claim that someone like her son will "never have real friends," which is incredibly insulting to autistic and otherwise neurodivergent individuals.

Declined using person-first language in her book not because of the many valid criticisms about the dehumanisation of autistic people but because it is “clunky” and she didn’t want to have to write “the phrase “person with autism” over and over again.” While the use of identity-first language is refreshing, the author implied that she would have used person-first language were it not so awkward to write.

Continued the long ableist trend of desexualising disabled people when she mocked the possibility of her son having any sort of romantic experience (“I could not imagine that any girl, anywhere, would find him interesting at this point”) and described the situation as one she imagines to be soundtracked by “Benny Hill” theme. 

Now we get onto the main problem of To Siri With Love, and it concerns the topic of eugenics. In the novel, Newman declared that she wanted to get Power of Attorney so that she could force her son to have a vasectomy so he couldn’t have children, so that she could have “one less worry. For [her.]” She then asked how she could make such a comment “without sounding like a eugenicist,” which only makes it worse by highlighting that she understands the horrific concept of eugenics. She then explains the unpleasant history of eugenics, acknowledging how “the history of disability is inextricably intertwined with the history of euthanizing and enforced sterilization,” but admits that she would still be “the first in line to sign him up.”

I hope this explanation sheds some light onto the problematic nature of this memoir and the ableist commentary within it. Please, if you want to read a real-life story about autistic life, do yourself a favour and read any one of the countless memoirs by members of the autistic community instead of the undeniable ableism presented by Judith Newman. 

getting to see a ton of autistic people being vocal about their upset and demanding to be listened to and respected. rock on my dudes.

the voices of autistic writers in particular being amplified which is especially great because of how little recognition they usually get.

actuallyautistic advocates and activists using the boycott as a jumping off point to talk about really important issues that otherwise might not get the same publicity.

autistic parents and kids of autistic parents speaking out against eugenics and forced sterilization.

autistic parents becoming more visible in general!! i never really had any idea how many autistic parents there were because i, like many autistic people, was raised with the mindset that we were inherently unfit for parenting as a whole. i legitimately don’t think i even realized how wrong that concept was until now because it was just so ingrained into my understanding of the world, which is all kinds of fucked up and all too common.

some of the reviews and commentary on its contents have made me realize how common certain experiences with abuse are for autistic people, and after years of being gaslighted and struggling to let myself even acknowledge my trauma never mind heal from it, it’s really validating to know that a) i did experience what i experienced b) those things weren’t the Nothing allistics claimed they were; they were indeed acts of abuse c) other people have experienced the same thing and have been able to make steps towards recovery.

now whenever someone asks what an Autism Mom is we have a clear and easily recognizable example along with a lengthy list of thoroughly documented Don’ts for parents of autistic children.

expanding on that, to siri is just such a perfect example of every reason to take ableism against autistic people seriously. allistics, yall have no excuse not to educate yourself because this- THIS- is what your ignorance leads to. you have no reason to act surprised when people call your bullshit out because apparently when we slack off you go and publish a whole fuckin book about the extensive emotional abuse of your autistic son.

tl;dr to siri is disgusting and it sucks big time that it exists, but it’s also created an important discussion and it makes me overwhelmingly proud to see these awesome autistic voices rising up to take part in it.

Trigger warning: Ableism, eugenics, medical abuse.

The autistic community is boycotting the book To Siri With Love, published by HarperCollins and written by Judith Newman. Please stand with us. #BoycottToSiri

edit *this video is now captioned!

Content Note: Forced Sterilization