#bahannah01

Yikes, I’m still late! But this chapter is a fair bit longer so hopefully, that makes up for it and there is some awesome pal talk in this! <3 With a special pal cause I’m trash ;3 Hope you all enjoy!! :)) Tell me if you guys still want a continuation as the next chapter will probably be the last! Are you ready?

Pt. 1 Pt. 2 Pt.3 Pt. 4

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Enjoy!

~~

     The days dragged on, the argument felt like a ball and chain on your ankle- slowing you down physically and exhausting your mind. By some chance, you hoped that Ethan would make some sort of effort to make things better, whether it would be coming to your apartment with a bundle of flowers proclaiming his apology or simply a text asking to meet up and talk this out. Yet.... after five days of silence, you began to give up on making up.

     Could you have been the one to reach out? Of course. Though this wasn’t how it was supposed to be, he needed to be the one to contact you. Besides… he was the one who also said he didn’t want to move on with the relationship. Maybe him not contacting you is his way of really saying that your relationship really is over then.

     You know that you more or less left your relationship open-ended but you hoped that he would at least try to make things better, say those sweet words that can sway your heart and make you smile like nothing ever happened.

     But they never came.

     So, maybe, it really was over. All those nights spent cuddled up with each other, mornings spent avoiding getting out of bed and finally making breakfast around noon, little texts throughout the day that made your hearts leap, hearing his beautiful voice as you passed the shower; all of that, all the little things that would be such memorable moments with Ethan will stop.

      A hand runs through your hair and you can’t help the sigh that passes your lips, what are you going to do without him? Humorous laughter fills the air and the tears begin to well in your eyes, all of this because you wanted to have him even more yet it somehow resulted in now having none of him.

     What a bitter turn of events.

     It doesn’t help that you have to go into your work, dealing with angry customers who don’t understand return policies or ask mind-numbing questions all while your chest is aching with such a longing to be with Ethan again.

     By the end of the week, everyone knew what happened. It wasn’t as if you told anybody, apart from your two coworkers who you’ve grown close with over the year and a half of working together. They helped to ease the pain while at work and tried to contain the news from spreading, but it hardly worked. Everyone in your little department store knew you're off your new and sad single status.

     Even Josh…

     Josh, someone you’ve complained about on multiple occasions to your dear ex-boyfriend. Someone who no matter how many times you’ve told him that you had a boyfriend and he would still try and test your unwavering loyalty with a most tempting offer of a coffee with the ‘greatness that is Josh’... Ah yes, Josh is certainly a person who exists.

     Since he’s realized you’ve separated from Ethan, he’s become even more persistent much to your dismay. Flirting and continuously touching you to the point where if you even see him from across the store, you make sure to go in the opposite direction to put as much distance between you two as possible. And whenever he does pop up from whichever pit of Hell he came from, you’ve decided to skip the niceties and simply tell him to ‘fuck off’ since it seems like it's the only thing that will get through that thick skull of his.

     Or, it does for a while, at least.

    Though, when he really won’t leave you alone, your friend Tae comes to the rescue! Throwing an arm over your shoulder and excusing the two of you with his all familiar boxy smile, it was your little piece of solace as for whatever reason, the two of you shared more shifts and after the breakup, his joyful attitude is what you needed. The fact that he’d help with Josh was only a bonus, well, that and the small pranks Tae would pull on him in revenge.

     They normally only make you smile, but today, his mischievous plans have you breathless in laughter after letting you see Josh jump in fear when one of the plushies in the children’s department started yelling at him with a voice far deeper than his own. With you and Tae horribly failing at containing your laughter and eventually leaning on each other for support, you come to the realization that this is the first time in a week you even laughed.

      Between the breakup, the bad customers, Josh… You’ve really only been moping around like an empty shell, minus the random bursts of anger towards your oblivious pursuer.

      But this idiotic prank with your friend pretending to be an angry unicorn who’s upset with the customer service… The rain clouds left and in came the sunny skies again, a light heart and a light mind thanks to your dear friend.

     Your laughs begin to dissipate and a warm smile takes its place at this resolution. Maybe you won’t be stuck in this miserable abyss, after all.

     The smile on your face seems to light up the workplace and even the customers, you can’t even deny that for once your mind isn’t spiraling around Ethan and if he’ll call anymore. He would have by now and the fact that he hasn’t, while it weighs on your heart, isn’t occupying your mind as long as you’re around your prankster of a friend.

      By the time that lunch comes around, you decide to actually go out on your break and enjoy the sunny Californian day that awaits you outside. A blissful sigh leaves your parted lips as you take a step outside the store and take in a breath of fresh air and it acts like a filter, filling you up and cleaning out all of those negative bits that have been latched onto you like a parasite and draining the life from you since your breakup.

     You simply stand there for a moment, the sun warming up your skin almost making you want to curl up and bask in the sun like a cat, though it isn’t until you hear the sound of heavy footsteps that you break from your daze.

     With a twinge of hope, you pray that it’s Tae who followed you out here and not a certain idiot who doesn’t understand no means no.

     Which makes it all the more disappointing when you see the blonde walking your way with a stupid smirk.

     How hard is it for him to understand that you’re not interested?

     According to Jesse, your fellow coworker who is a complete sweetheart yet also a die-hard gossip girl, you happen to be his newest challenge. One that’s lasted at least two months now… Though, apparently, the girl before you had it way worse and you can’t even imagine what worse would be like, nor do you want to.

     “Go away, Josh… I am actually having a nice day for the first time in days and I do not need your flirting to ruin it. I tried to be nice, but seriously, dude! I’ve started just saying ‘fuck off’ is that not obvious enough?” Your exasperation with his antics bleeding into his voice, which he casually shrugs off.

     “You’re only teasing me, babe, we know you think I’m cute.” Now, if you had never heard him talk, would you consider him attractive? Yes. After he opens his mouth? No.

     You just look at him and shake your head, briefly walking in the store and into the breakroom, grabbing Tae in mid-bite of his cold pizza, taking him outside with your arms linked despite his confusion and finally returning your gaze to an also confused Josh, “So, Josh, as you can see I am going to eat lunch with Taehyung. He is a cool pal, you are not, and therefore, you cannot accompany us. You are not a pal. Now, I am leaving with this man and you can have lunch with Cheryl in the breakroom and talk about her grandson Jimmy. Sound good? Good!” With that little monologue over you drag Tae over to your car and once finally inside, let out another sigh just from the stupidity of the situation.

     “You owe me a slice, I had to abandon my lunch for you,” His Korean accent fills the air and you let out a light laugh, “How about some tea and sweets instead?”

     With a content hum, he nods and gives you a thumbs up in approval sending smiles across both of your cheeks. The moment you arrive at the cafe you find yourself instantly relaxing, the two of you find a small table near the window as you find yourselves talking and laughing about nothing… Until he asks about the breakup.

     You sum it up for him with brief sips of tea in between, he silently nods along listening to your tale and as you tell him you realize you can get an outside male opinion on the matter, “So… What do you think?”

     “Hm… You two love obviously each other. Did he slip up? A little, I think he just chose the wrong words though and ended up making you upset. I think that’s why he won’t contact you though,” a light chuckle leaves his lips as he scratches his neck, “I’d be scared to say the wrong thing again, you know? Make things worse and ruin any chances of getting back together, even if he’s ruining his chances by staying silent.”

     Your fingers trace the rim of your mug as a frown sets in your expression, “You really think that’s why he won’t call me?... I just, I love him, Tae. It hurts that I love him because it seems like he doesn’t… He wanted other options-”

     “Ah- no, you said he thought you two were too young for this. Might that mean he wants to explore more? Maybe. But, you can’t assume he meant that, if anything, it seems like he’s just scared of a commitment that big simply because it’s a big commitment.”

     “Should… Should I call him?”

     “I think so,” he shrugs but not before an impish grin crosses his expression, “plus, in the future, you can hold it over his head that even when he messed up you were the one to fix things.”

      Shaking your head, a giggle bubbles out of you with a roll of your eyes, “You really are a mischievous one, Tae.”

     You kick your shoes off as you settle into your sofa, the rest of work being brightened by your friend and an annoyed Josh that was having his ear talked off by sweet old Cheryll. Gentle hums fill the air as you scroll through all the messages you missed, once again having your mood deflated by the lack of ones from Ethan, though the ones from Mark spark your curiosity.

     In all fairness, you didn’t want to talk to Mark about the breakup. He was Ethan’s friend first and it felt weird to try and talk to him about it, so to randomly get messages from him is odd, to say the least. Tapping on the message log, you read through and see him asking about who it was he saw you with at lunch and what’s going on between you and Ethan. You shrug, you’ll answer it later. Right now; however, you should give Ethan a call. Taking a deep breath, your finger hovers over his contact and you find your eyes closing; goodness, you can hear your own heartbeat… If Ethan was worried about saying the wrong thing, why aren’t you? What if you make this even worse?

     No! No, you can’t think like that. Like Tae said, being silent only hurts each other more. After taking a deep breath, you get ready to press the call button.

     Yet, a knock on your door interrupts you once again.

     Groaning, you chew your bottom lip and stand still, wondering if they’ll go away. But instead, the knocking only becomes more urgent.

     What a perfect time for the universe to send another idiot to your door.

~~

@ericaawkward : Fluffy movie night with Ethan. Please?

Ah I am so sorry it took so long!! Hopefully you’ll still enjoy it, honey! <3

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Tags: @kourt-kay @bananakid42 @themarkiplierexperience  @let-it-go-and-live-again @skarletton @totalwhovian@randomboxofsadness@browniebri @amostpeculiarmademoisellerp @potteritis  if you want to be on the tagged list,  just message me and it shall be done!

Enjoy!

~~

     Ethan wanted tonight to be perfect- or well, perfect in a casual way, wanting it to be one of the coziest of cozy nights for both of you. The two of you have hardly had enough time for each other recently; your school and part-time job demanding a lot of attention, especially as finals are steadily making their way around the corner. Meanwhile, Ethan had been working on some side projects with his friend Mark in addition to his normal, but still plentiful, workload. Needless to say, the two of you were in need of some cuddles.

     So, Ethan aimed to transform his apartment into a giant soft and fluffy palace; a bountiful amount of pillows were strewn about the living area, blankets covering almost all of the tiny room. And after some he managed to convince Amy and Kathryn, he was able to borrow some fairy lights to add to the mystical, yet calm, aura of the room- albeit, it was also because he knew of your affinity for the delicate choice in lighting. Tonight was all about relaxing, after all, and Ethan was sure to make it as soothing as possible. Nights like these somehow became rare in your relationship over the past few weeks, and it bothered both of you that your schedules managed to cause some of the romance to fade in your relationship.

     Which was why your dorky brunette wanted to bring it back with a bang.

     The moment he heard the knock on his door, Ethan checked over everything once again to make sure it was all good to go. Your favorite snack was waiting to be eaten on the counter along with a box of pizza and a bowl of freshly popped popcorn, the soft lighting was all prepared, and the room looked like a plush haven. Yeah, tonight would be amazing!

     He opened the door with a smile adorning his features, “Good evening, m’lady,” the brunette lead you in and watched as your eyes widened with astonishment at all his hard work. He couldn’t help but feel a sense of pride run through his mind.

     “Ethan… What is all of this?” You asked turning around, lips spreading into a surprised but joyous smile, “I thought we were just having a movie night?”

     The man in question chuckled and gave a nod, though he scratched the back of his neck with a slightly sheepish composure, “We are, but, I wanted to make tonight extra fluffy and special, y’know?”

     You let out a light laugh and hugged your sweet boyfriend, finding it incredible how you managed to have such a loving and caring guy in your life that would go all out for a simple movie night just because it’s been a while. How can a person be so cute? Goodness, Ethan really has been a blessing in your life. “Do you know that you’re an actual beehive? Like, the amount of sweetness that is in you, honey, is beeyond me,” You playfully complimented while also turning it into as cheesy of a joke as this idea of his- only one is cheesy humor, the other is a cheesy and adorable action of luck.

      And he found it just as silly and stupid as you hoped he would, “Just go to the couch, ya dork,” though before you can, Ethan gave your nose a little kiss- enough for a light wave of heat to rush to your cheeks as the endearing act, “By the way,” he interjected, walking over towards the counter and showing off his array of treats for the night, “We’ve got pizza, popcorn, and your favorite!” As if he wanted to prove to you even more that he was the best boyfriend ever.

     “Yes! Okay, um, popcorn first, since it is a movie night! Then we can indulge in the rest,” You proposed as you plopped down on the comfy couch that felt like a cloud with how many pillows and blankets he had rested on it. Ethan agreed and happily brought the bowl over to the couch with a light jog, he sat beside you, his free arm open and inviting you for the cuddlefest that will last all night.

     Once the two of you got into perfect cuddling position, snuggled up to one another with the popcorn bowl nearby, the movie began. Simply enjoying one another’s company as the movie played on, not a single thought of school or work on either mind. After all, the only thing you needed to think about now was sitting right beside you.

Three hours late, sorry guys! But hopefully, it was worth the wait, if you guys really do want a part two, tell me! I’d love to hear the feedback on what you guys think about this :) Side note: to all Shawols out there, I may be a casual fan of SHINee but if you need to talk, I’m happy to lend an ear. I’m honestly still in shock over Jonghyun and can’t believe he’s gone... Again, if you need to talk, I’m here for you <3

Pt. 1 Pt. 2

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Enjoy!

~~

     The night fell, sprinkling the sky with stars that glisten and glow alongside the moon. An enchanting view that would light up the otherwise dark world- it sought help from the smaller fireflies that calmly fly about, attempting to brighten the world around them even more with their flickering flame.

     It is a night that allowed nature to play its tune; crickets would chirp every so often, loud enough that even inside of an apartment you could hear their determined melodies trying to reach out as far as they could. A nocturnal bird or two would sing its song, they were lead vocalist under the moon and yet, they would disappear for what you assumed would be the instrumental of crickets before returning and picking up from their chorus.

     Speaking of delightful melodies, your attention gets pulled back at the sound of laughter beside you, instantly spreading a smile across your lips. The not-so-blue boy lets a string of laughs escape his lungs and bring about this warmth and joy that seems to fill the room effortlessly, sighing contently, you nuzzle into him; feeling his laughter as it vibrates in his chest.

     His arm squeezes you just a tad, letting you know that he appreciates you curling up to him even more. And once his laughter dies down, he shoots you a cheerful grin.

     You could look at his smile all day if you could; it makes your dreams seem possible and all your bad days instantly amazing. You find a sense of home in his smile, easily, you can imagine coming home to it every day in a perfect world. That idea alone is enough to spread a giddy feeling throughout your mind. Coming home to Ethan? Whether he’d be screaming and recording a video, playing games on the couch, singing with that beautiful voice of his as he attempts to make dinner for the two of you… A terribly domestic dream that you wouldn’t mind losing yourself in.

      To some degree, you already live it. In the two years that you’ve been together, it’s gotten to the point where the two of you pick whose apartment you’re staying at. Waking up to one another in a warm embrace that makes getting out of bed even harder than it already was. Albeit, the idea of all the adorable, dorky selfies you’d receive at work would make getting up worth it and the idea of being apart a lot more tolerable despite rejoining at the end of the day to either his place or yours.

     So, maybe that’s why you decided that you would ask to move in with each other.

     After all, it would certainly be cheaper for both of you at this point to only pay rent for one apartment and it would cut the travel of going back and forth between apartments. With being together for two years, it just appeared to be the most rational thing to do.

     The movie has come to a dip in its plot and as you spot Ethan idly playing a game on his phone with his free hand, you figure that no time is better than the present.

     Albeit, some beforehand kisses may help, just in case.

     With a soft giggle, you place playful kisses on his cheek and enticing him to join in on the light laughter. A little battle of who can plant more pecks begins with both of you already red and smiling widely before ending with a sweet eskimo kiss and finally, a chaste shared kiss between the two of you.

      As you pull apart, your eyes connect and a loving gaze is shared; the corner of his eyes crinkling up with his smile. “Ethan?”

     “Yes, baby?”

     “I think we should take our relationship to the next step,” The words flow from your lips with confidence as a grin pulls at the corners. A sideways smile slides across his expression and his brows furrow, telling you that you’ll need to be just a bit more specific. You sigh, though still radiate the same confidence and excitement you had the very first time you said it and happily explain what you mean, “I just think that it would be a good idea for us to move in together.”

     “I mean, think about it, it would be a lot cheaper for both of us! We practically already live together and we’ve been together for more than two years now. It just seems a bit reasonable, plus we can finally co-adopt pets like we’ve talked about and-”

     “Stop.”

     “... Huh?”

     “Just stop, (Y/n).”

     “Ethan..? What’s wrong?”

     As you await his answer, you finally take in the drastic change in his features. His cheerful blue orbs are now steel and avoid your gaze, unable to speak his truth while looking into your eyes. The smile that was previously held is gone as his lips form a thin line and his brows knit together in guilt. He opens his mouth to speak but, shuts it a moment after; leaving you in the dark on whatever is going on in that mind of his.

     “Ethan,” Your voice stern, holding a tone that should demand his attention but fails to, “tell me why you wanted me to stop. What don’t you like about the idea of us moving in together?”

     “A lot.”

So I had started writing this a while ago and I honestly completely forgot about it until a few days ago and just today I was able to finish this little one-shot! It wasn’t requested but I remember thinking it was a stupid and cute thing to write for a quick little story and hopefully it’ll help me get back into my writing rhythm :) 

Summary: After a girls’ night out, you come home to Mark and tell him about your great accomplishment that night... albeit, you may be recovering from having a bit too much to drink while doing so. 

Warnings: Mentions of Alcohol 

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Check out the masterlist here :)  

Tags: @kourt-kay @bananakid42 @themarkiplierexperience  @let-it-go-and-live-again  @skarletton@totalwhovian@randomboxofsadness@browniebri @amostpeculiarmademoisellerp @potteritis  if you want to be on the tagged list,  just message me and it shall be done!

Enjoy!

~~

     The sound of the front door opening and shutting gains Mark’s attention, his eyes leave the T.V. and he catches the sight of you struggling with the removal of your shoes. As he's about to get up to possibly assist you in your endeavor, Chica beats him in greeting you- a rush of golden fur running past him and towards you. He couldn't help but chuckle and shake his head at the cute scene before him. The ravenette walks up to you with a sideways smile spread across his features, “How was your night, chickadee?” Yet, you don't reply. Instead, you just seem to be a bit distracted by Chica- who is happily licking every inch of your face- though, when Mark calls your name, your eyes meet his and soon a giggle spills from your lips.

     “It was so great, Mark! Everyone was like… so nice? I haven’t hung out with them in so long! And, and we went to this karaoke bar downtown and I rocked it!” You chime, slurring your words just enough to allow the ravenette to get the idea that maybe you indulged a bit too much while out. He’s hardly ever seen you intoxicated since you typically don’t drink around him, despite him telling you it’s fine. A tiny spark of curiosity goes off in the back of his mind and he can’t help but wonder what you’re like when you’ve knocked one too many back.

     “I believe you, babe,” An amused grin slides across his cheeks as he watches you light up, happy that he’s acknowledged your admirable achievement of ‘rocking it’ in a karaoke bar. Ah, but that ounce of curiosity leads him to his next question, one he simply couldn’t refuse to ask, “You wanna show me how you rocked it?”

     Your eyes widen and he watches as a glimmer of excitement shines through, you nod eagerly and after giving Chica one last pet and standing up, with a small stumble or two, you laugh sweetly, “Yeah! Are you sure you’re ready though? It’ll, like, blow your mind, Markimoo.”

     Mark hums in thought, giving his stubble a few intelligent strokes to make him appear as though he's in deep thought to your intoxicated self. After a moment, he takes a deep breath and sets his hands on his hips, “Alright, I'm ready. Show me what you got, baby!”

     You dust off your clothes and with a quick clearing of your throat, you begin to ‘sing’ Bruno Mars’ 24K Magic with such passion that Chica runs away. Totally because of the amount of passion, not because you're practically screaming it. Nope, Chica is just in awe and her cute little puppy dog ears just weren't prepared for such greatness, that's totally the reason why.

     Mark is trying very hard not to laugh.

     Mark is failing at that task.

     Your expression changes to one of confusion as a pout forms on your lips, “Why are you laughing, Mark..?”

     Shit.

     He rubs the back of his neck and calms his laughter, “I, I was just so overwhelmed but joy from your singing that I couldn't help but laugh. You were so amazing, baby.” Hopefully, that'll get Mark off the chopping board.

     And it does.

     In a quick flash, your expression changes once again into one of admiration and you quickly throw yourself onto your boyfriend and embrace him tightly, “Awe, Mark!! You're so sweet!” You coo, beginning to pepper his face in quick kisses, “I have the best boyfriend ever!”

     Mark merely chuckles and hugs you back, cheerfully accepting his reward for playing it off smoothly. Or, smooth enough to get it past the version of you that's intoxicated because never would that have worked if you were sober- far too smart for that. Though for now, he'll just enjoy this silly, affectionate, and drunk persona of yours. Albeit, it does worry him a little at the thought of you possibly hugging some stranger because they complimented your ‘singing’, “Gotta remember to tell your friends not to let you drink so much next time...”

    “What was that?”

   “Nothing, baby, just making a mental note.”

~~

      To give you all a bit of a brief explanation of what happened, I can break it down into two parts. It’s a bit much so if you don’t want to read, just know it was stress and then sadness because of friends lol.

      Firstly, college classes suck haha. I’m in a dual enrollment program at my school and I am currently taking two college course- one being stat and probability and the other being English. During the same week, they assigned big projects and tests/essays. I was on edge and all my writing was spent on this class and by the time I’d be done and even think about writing a fic, I was burnt out :( It sucked. Still does, but I’m getting better at managing things and trying my best to keep up with the other hobbies that give me joy- like writing for you guys ! :)

      Secondly, once all that finally passed and was cleared up, I was so happy and just felt overall relieved. Until my one friend got with her bum of an ex. I won’t say anything, but just know he’s not the best. I told her I was worried about her getting hurt so badly again like before and... She left me on read. So, I just added a message about how I would always be there for her no matter what... and she also left me on read for that. This was my best friend of six years basically picking a boy over me, so I was really hurt for a while. By that point, I was just too much of an emotional mess to write ^^; She’s still ignoring me, but I’ve finally accepted it and other really good friends helped me through it c:. 

This is a completely unedited little fic I made cause I got sad and frustrated with people and basically just wanted to hug Ethan because the bean is a sweetie- also my first time writing purely for Ethan sooo we’ll see how this goes??

Send in requests!

Check out the masterlist here :)  

Tags: @kourt-kay @bananakid42 @themarkiplierexperience  @let-it-go-and-live-again  @skarletton @totalwhovian@randomboxofsadness@browniebri  @amostpeculiarmademoisellerp @potteritis  if you want to be on the tagged list,  just message me and it shall be done!

Enjoy!

~~

     People suck.

     That isn’t something you’re just now finding out; however, it’s something you are being heavily reminded of currently. All you wanted to do was make him happy and be there for him and yet when he started to develop feelings for you that you didn’t exactly reciprocate, he decides to try and guilt you into feeling sorry enough so that you’ll stay?

     The worst part about that was it almost worked. You almost fell into his trap, a cautious but hopeful lamb that was almost swallowed up by this wolf-in-sheep’s-clothing. His pleas rang through your phone’s speaker and you could feel your heart shatter with every word that slides out of that manipulative mouth of his- the way his words would wreak your mind, leaving you in tears because you did this to him.

     It was all your fault that he was upset.

     It was all your fault that he was yelling.

     It was all your fault that he was getting more and more aggressive.

     But most of all, it was all your fault that he was hurting.

     Anf he would make sure you knew that- he made sure that you were sorry for rejecting him when you had apparently ‘led him on’ and gave him the ‘better-as-friends’ speech; enough so that you couldn’t stop crying for two hours even after that call. However, a brief calm passed over you and in that moment, you heard your phone go off again. You could feel your heart stop in your chest as the unsuitably joyful tone bounces off the walls and into your ears, it takes you a moment but when you finally realize that it’s Ethan’s ringtone, the fear of him calling again dissipated and instead, relief washed over you. You answered his call with a shaky ‘hello’ and while you may be over the phone, he instantly realized something was wrong and decided to stop by- normally you’d protest, although secretly wanting him to come over anyway, but you were far too tired and you honestly needed the company now more than ever.

     Which leads to you currently being seated on the couch and waiting for Ethan to finish making hot-coco. You snuggle up in the blanket that he ever-so-lovingly wrapped you up in when he arrived, you wipe the straying tears from your eyes. The second Ethan arrived he simply allowed you to cry as he held you, at some points, it almost seemed like he was about to cry- it hurt so much to see you so distraught, though he wanted to be strong for you and be steady, it was what you needed. Ever since then, you’ve only shed a tear or two every now and again.

     The only remaining feeling is the emptiness; the kind that eats you up the more you think about it and makes it so easy to fall down that dark abyss of no escape, it was odd how something that makes you feel like nothing can weigh on your heart like an anvil- it creates this sinking feeling in your chest that makes you wonder if you’ve already fallen down that abyss or not. You must be staring into space because you suddenly feel someone give your shoulder a gentle shake, “You in there?” His chuckle manages to shine an ounce of light onto your heart, lifting some of the weight off. The ghost of a smile slides across your lips, it’s hardly noticeable, albeit Ethan spots it immediately.

    “Yeah, just thinking about it all,” Your voice is calm, but holds this odd sense of a bittersweet melody to it. Ethan offers a warm smile, all the same, hoping it’ll spread to you, and sits beside you on the couch, handing over your hot-coco. You bring it to your lips and sip the sweet drink as it warms you up, and just as Ethan hopes, your smile becomes just a little bit bigger. It may not be that much of a difference, but it’s an improvement to him!

      The brunette relaxes into the couch and cautiously wraps his arm around your shoulder, after seeing you come closer into him, he relaxes and subconsciously traces little shapes into your arm with his index finger, “If you, uh, don’t want to talk about it that’s okay. But, you do know I’m here for you right?”

      A light laugh escapes you without much of a second thought after you nod and smile up at him, “Ethan- you rushed over, basically tucked me in, and made me hot-coco. I know you’re here for me.”

     “Just wanted to make sure,” He chuckles and returns your smile with his own, one that gives you the same warmth that the hot-coco did- and it’s just as sweet too.

     “Thank you for coming over, Ethan, I… I really appreciate this.”

     “Whenever you need it, I’m always here for you and ready to make coco!”

     You happily snuggle into him, resting your head on his shoulder and keeping your mug of coco in your hand and simply stay there with him- listening to the sound of his heart and allowing his words to resonate. They were genuine and kind, ones that were more than refreshing after everything’s that’s happened. A content sigh falls from your lips; this is where one finds love, at the bottom of a hot-coco mug or lost in an oversized blanket that’s begging to be cuddled up in, not in false accusations and guilt-trips.

~~

Request: can you do a sad fanfic? with a male pov, and like the gang gets caught up with another project that they forget about dinner plans the guy was really excited about. but no one showed up, so they kinda go down a spiral ya know? Idkk! -Submitted by anonymous  

Hopefully, I pulled off the male pov, this was my first time only doing the perspective from a guy in quite a long time so I hope you’ll like it! ^^ Either way, I loved writing this and putting in all the emotion into this fic :) Also, this fic is much more of a platonic (albeit angsty) Teamiplier x Reader story which is also a newly welcomed trend on this blog <3 ((Btw the gif is extremely misleading lol this is not a happy fic))

Send in requests!

Check out the masterlist here :)  

Tags: @kourt-kay @bananakid42 @mtttme @let-it-go-and-live-again@skarletton if you want to be on the tagged list,  just message me and it shall be done!

Enjoy!

~~

     The tick tock of the clock hanging in the hallway seems to mock you as you anxiously await the arrival of your dear friends. A heavy sigh leaves your lungs as your finger taps against the granite counter top, rocking back and forth on the balls of your feet. You couldn’t stand still- it’s been twenty minutes past six, the agreed time, and yet you’re alone with this feast you made for the gang. You finally graduated and got your culinary arts degree last week and in celebration, you wanted to show off your cooking skills to the people closest to you. It was going to be amazing! You already had everything planned in your mind the moment after you proposed it- everything from the hors d'oeuvres, appetizers, main course, and dessert; each course being more delicious than the last! You remembered how they practically drooled as you talked about your plans- it seemed like they were just as excited as you were about this.

     Yet, you can’t help but worry as the clock hands continue to move without a word from anyone in Teamiplier. Maybe they got caught in traffic? Yeah… That could be it! After all, the traffic in L.A can be killer at times, they’ll probably be here soon, apologizing for their lateness and giving you hugs. You would playfully tease them by pretending to be upset and after pulling their tails just enough, you’d laugh and they would catch on, laughing along with you.

     The night can still be perfect, you have no doubt about it. 

~~

     It’s seven o’clock: an hour past the set time…

     You tried calling their phones; Mark, Tyler, Ethan, Amy, Katherine… All of them, and yet, none of them picked up. Are they still coming..?

     Clouds of doubt overshadow your mind as you continue to wait for these people who you consider your best friends; your family by now. You can’t stop thinking about them, mood changing from worry, to frustration, to worry again and just utter confusion. They’re all that’s on your mind and a bitter question shows its face as your mind travels down this dangerous path of self-doubt: did they forget?

     Did they forget about your plans? Your graduation? Your celebration?... Did they forget about you? How is it that you can’t get them off your mind, for better or worse, and yet they might not even spare you a second thought?

     Had you done something wrong?

     You stand up from your seat at the empty table and return to your impatient and anxious pacing across the kitchen- back and forth and back and forth and back and forth. Your fingers find your tie and you loosen it as it suddenly starts to feel like the heat is engulfing you and punishing you for whatever is it that you did to make them forget about you.

     But maybe… Maybe they really were just late?

     If that was the case though, why haven’t they answered your calls or at least called you back? Why the Hell haven’t they contacted you?!

     A hand weaves its way through your locks and you take a look around the kitchen, a humorless chuckle passing your lips. The food must be cold by now, there goes all the effort you put into this dinner party. There goes everyone’s dinner. There goes every piece of food that you worked so hard to make perfect for them.

     Without realizing it, the pent up frustration builds up and begins to pool its way out through bitter tears. Your chest rising and falling, walking up the plates you had readied for the occasion, you stare down at them. The corners of your lips turning down into a frown and in a swift movement, one of the plates end up in your hands, then the air, the wall, and finally smashing into porcelain shards that now scatter the hallway. You’re not entirely sure why you did it- but it felt good.

     It takes you another two plates to remember just how expensive they were and how dangerous your hallway was now and you helplessly sink to the floor, knees to your chest as you wonder what you could have done wrong. You were so happy about this… It seemed like everyone was... and yet, no one is even trying to reach out to you.

     Are you really that insignificant to them? The more you think about it, the more reasonable it sounds. Everyone else had YouTube tying them together, but you? You’re becoming a chef- one that isn’t exactly tech savvy at that. It would be so easy for them to drop you… Is that what this is? Have they officially realized they don’t need you?

     Your eyes shut tightly, hating these possibilities that your mind loves to throw at you. Probably because you couldn’t help but think that they may be true. Could they really not care about you? You care so much about them and if the feeling isn’t mutual- it’d break your heart.

     With your elbows on your knees, your hands run through your hair again- desperately trying to rid yourself of these thoughts, though only proving futile in the end. Is this what it feels like to be left behind? To know that you’re not important enough to share their time?

     You thought they loved you; that they thought of you as family, too. But, maybe that was your hopeful heart seeing what it wanted to.

      They all may be together- laughing and goofing around as they relish that last rays of sunshine they could get before the day ends. Yet, you are alone with a cold dinner made for six- empty chairs and broken plates, left in the dark and left behind.

      The last question in your throat is the simplest, yet the one you dread the most.

      Why?

~~

Request: Hi! First of all, I love your blog and was wondering if you were taking requests (if not that’s okay!) I’ve felt really sad lately and thought maybe of one where you and Mark have hit that serious point in your relationship and you’re terrified about him finding out that you take meds for depression and anxiety and you forget to hide your pill bottles one morning and he finds them and confronts you about them, fully supporting you?

Super sweetness ahead! Really, it’s heartwarming!💙 Also, if any of you ever need to talk, please know that I am always here for you guys! For anything and everything, okay? :) 

Send in requests!

Check out the masterlist here :)  

Tags: @kourt-kay @bananakid42 @themarkiplierexperience  @let-it-go-and-live-again  @skarletton @totalwhovian @randomboxofsadness @browniebri  @ amostpeculiarmademoisellerp if you want to be on the tagged list,  just message me and it shall be done!

Enjoy!

~~

   The plush blanket that is wrapped around your form keeps you warm as you snuggle further into your pillow- not wanting to greet the morning yet, instead, wishing to take in this serene moment for all it is worth. You can feel the sun beaming in from the window, trying to get you up and moving with each of its rays that shine on your sleepy self. The ghost of a frown etches onto your expression and you reach out, stretching your arm under the covers to try and cuddle your boyfriend so you can avoid the morning light together.

   Yet, when you reach out- there isn’t a single trace of him in the bed.

   Finally, you open your eyes and look around in search of the ravenette who has mysteriously disappeared without you knowing. Luckily, there aren’t many places he could be in your apartment seeing as aside from the bathroom and bedroom, everything else is set as an open floor plan. Begrudgingly, you toss the blanket off yourself and leave the warmth of the bed behind you as you work to find Mark- he will have to pay for making you leave the cozy cocoon you had made for yourself, but for now, a simple light scolding would do until you could formulate a proper plan.

   Nevertheless, the sound of your bare feet padding against the hardwood of your apartment echoes out as you quickly go to search the living room and kitchen. They were clear… Which only leaves the bathroom. A yawn passes your lips as you head back over to the room, albeit it’s silent and the door is ever so slightly ajar as if he had gotten distracted right before fully closing the door. Your brows knit together as you suddenly feel a wave of anxiety come over you, you aren’t exactly sure why though. Something just feels off and it almost makes you want to back up, leaving the room alone altogether. Almost.    You proceed cautiously and rather than knocking on the door, in fear that you may cause it to open even further and possibly invade his privacy, you knock on the wooden frame- three steady taps break the silence that you didn’t even realize encompassed the two of you, “You okay, Mark?”

   “…Am I okay?” He echoes from behind, Mark’s voice sounding a bit dazed and confused, only piquing your interest further. What could have him so perplexed while he’s in the bathroom? Honestly, all possible answers to that question that you have conjured up in your mind are… Odd, to say the least. Before you could inquire as to what the actual answer may be, he speaks up again. No longer is the confusion lacing his words, but a sorrowful sweetness that’s as cautious as you were earlier, “Are you okay?”

   At first, his question had the same effect as his previous one. However, the more you deliberate on why he would ask a question of that nature, a spark of fear and realization burns in your heart and mind, your chest suddenly feeling tight and your hands trembling at the idea of him finding your secret; one that while you’ve been meaning to talk about, you never did.

   Sighing, your hand tentatively reaches out and pushes the door fully open, your breath caught in your throat as Mark’s tan hand holds one of the pill bottles that sit atop your bathroom counter. You usually hide them from his sight, but Mark’s visit last night was a surprise and those little pills weren’t along your train of thought by that point… If you knew it would lead to this, they would have been the only thing you could think about.

   You chew your bottom lip as you try to think of what to say, yet nothing comes to mind. As your eyes travel to the floor you hear a heavy exhale before strong arms wrap around you in a secure embrace, “Why didn’t you tell me?” His voice wasn’t harsh nor resentful, it was concerned and a little hurt- after all, there are hardly any secrets between the two of you- so why would you hide this?

   “I… I wanted to, I just wasn’t sure when to,” A sigh fell from your lips as you slowly but surely return his hug, fearful that this may be the last one, “It’s not exactly something that comes up in conversation…”

   “No… But it’s something that’s important to know.” He placed his forehead against yours and allowed his thoughts to organize themselves before speaking again, a question arising as he thinks, “…Is why you won’t move in with me?”

   It is. The two of you had been together for almost three years and every time he brought the topic up, you’d be quick to dodge it or progressively change the subject into something new. You want to move in with him, you want to be able to wake up next to him and fall asleep beside him every day and every night but… But this secret of yours made you hesitant. Afraid of the exact situation you’re in currently; of him finding your pills, finding out that you have depression and anxiety and… Well, leaving you because of it. Rationally, you know Mark would never leave you based on your illnesses, he isn’t the kind to do so. It’s just that the possibility that he would, no matter how small, terrified you.

   He takes your silence as a yes. Mark pulls himself apart from you a little bit, his grasp on you still present, “I just want you to be happy and healthy. If these help you, then I’m glad that you have them… I want to be here for you, not only for the positive, happy times but also the stressful and sad times,” His brown eyes leave yours and drift to the right as he ponders over his words.

   “These pills… They don’t mean you’re helpless. They mean that you’re strong enough to accept the help you need- and we all need help. You know well that I’m a workaholic and I can get way too wrapped up in my work to the point that is bad for my health, but you help me by being there to give me a place to rest up and recharge,” Mark chuckled lightly as his lips leave a delicate, lingering kiss on your forehead, “With our without pills, you’re still this strong, wonderful person that I love with all my heart.”

   “Mark…”

   “You know it’s true.”

   How can someone manage to erase all your doubts so quickly as he can? Mark never ceases to amaze you; he’s gentle, kind, caring… All you ever hoped to have in the one you love and more.

   “You really are a miracle, aren’t you, Mark?”

   “No, I’m just in love.”

~~