Summary: Toji got arrested and now you have to bail him out with your pink haired brat.
The afternoon sun filtered through the dusty dorm window, casting long shadows across your desk as you focused on your notes.
You took a slow, methodical sip of tea, the rich aroma swirling around you, it was a high end blend, the kind of artisanal loose-leaf that definitely didn’t belong to a student budget, and most certainly wasn't poached from Sukuna’s prized, "off-limits" collection.
The peaceful silence shattered as the door slammed against the wall with a violent bang. Before you could even swallow your tea, Sukuna strode in, looking entirely too smug. He had his phone pressed to his ear, his eyes gleaming with a dark, amused mischief that usually spelled trouble.
"What do you need?" you started, but he cut you off with a sharp, knowing look.
"I'll answer that later!" you hissed. With a frantic scramble, you shoved the mug behind a stack of textbooks and snapped your laptop shut, clearing your workspace to give him the undivided attention he clearly demanded. "What's... going on? Why are you home?"
"Our idiot got himself arrested," he stated plainly, leaning against the doorframe.
You blinked, your brain momentarily short-circuiting as you tilted your head in genuine confusion. "Our idiot..? What are you talking abou-?" Then, the realization settled like a lead weight in your stomach. "Oh. You mean Toji."
You let out a soft hum of acknowledgement, but after a three-second delay, the severity of the sentence finally clicked.
You practically lunged across the room, crossing the small dorm in two strides to grab the collar of his shirt. You started to shake him with frantic energy, as if physical force could rattle the full story out of him. "What do you mean 'arrested'?! Ryo, tell me what happened! Is he hurt? Did he get into a fight? What did he do?!"
"Babe, relax," Sukuna chuckled, his voice a low rumble as he easily withstood your shaking. He looked down at you with a dismissive shrug, his grin widening. "He’s basically built for a cell; have you seen the man? He’ll be fine. Apparently, he was running some elaborate illegal gambling ring on the side to 'supplement his income.' Classic Toji."
He snickered, clearly finding the chaos more entertaining than stressful. You groaned, your hands sliding off his shirt as you pressed your palms into your forehead, trying to soothe the immediate headache forming there.
"God, that sounds exactly like him," you sighed, grabbing your jacket and keys. "Come on, let’s go bail our boyfriend out before he decides to start a riot just for the hell of it."
The walk to the station was a blur of Sukuna’s mocking laughter and your own frantic pacing. By the time you pushed through the heavy glass doors of the precinct, the fluorescent lights felt aggressive, humming with the kind of sterile energy that made your skin crawl.
You didn't even have to ask the officer at the front desk where he was. You just had to follow the sound of a deep, gravelly voice arguing about the "mathematical probability of a winning streak" and the sharp, rhythmic clink of handcuffs hitting a metal table.
There he was, sat behind the reinforced glass of the holding area. Toji looked less like a man who had just been busted for a felony and more like a king lounging on a throne, if the throne was a bolted-down plastic chair and the kingdom was a six by eight cage. His black t-shirt was strained against his shoulders, and he had a bored, sleepy expression that shifted into a sharp, lopsided grin the moment he spotted you two.
"Took you long enough," Toji called out, his voice vibrating through the intercom. "I was starting to think I’d have to start charging these guys for the entertainment."
"You look remarkably comfortable for someone who's one phone call away from being expelled," Sukuna remarked, sauntering up to the glass and tapping it with a knuckle. He looked Toji up and down, a judgmental smirk playing on his lips. "Illegal gambling, Toji? Really? You couldn't just get a job at the campus gym like a normal person?"
"Gyms don't pay out in cash-in-hand, Ryo," Toji countered, leaning back and stretching his arms as far as the cuffs would allow. He looked toward you, his eyes softening just a fraction, though that signature mischief remained. "Hey, princess. You look stressed. You should've finished that tea before you came down here."
"I can't believe you," you breathed, pressing your hand against the cool glass. "Toji, we were supposed to have dinner. Not a visitation hour. Are you okay? Did they-"
"I'm fine," he interrupted, his voice dropping into that low, grounding tone that always managed to settle your nerves, even in the middle of a police station. "Just a minor misunderstanding regarding the house's cut. Though, I might need one of you to cover the bail. I'm a bit... liquid-poor at the second."
"Liquid-poor," Sukuna repeated, throwing his head back with a sharp bark of a laugh. "You’re broke. Just say you’re broke."
Toji shrugged, unbothered. "Details. Now, are you two going to stand there and critique my financial planning, or are we going home?"
Sukuna didn't move toward the bail clerk. Instead, he folded his arms over his chest, leaning his shoulder against the cold brick wall with a look of pure, calculated malice.
He watched Toji through the glass for a long moment before turning his gaze toward you, a slow, wicked hum vibrating in his throat.
"You know," Sukuna began, his voice dropping into that smooth, persuasive tone he used when he was about to suggest something terrible. "The more I think about it, the more I feel like this is a 'teachable moment.' A little overnight stay might be good for his soul. Build some character."
"Sukuna, don't start," you groaned, already reaching for your wallet.
"I’m serious!" He stepped closer, circling you like a shark, his eyes dancing with dark delight. "Look at him. He’s already making friends with the guard. If we take him home now, he’s just going to go right back to his little 'business ventures' tomorrow. But if we leave him here? Just one night? Think of the peace and quiet. No one hogging the shower, no one eating your snacks, and best of all..." He leaned down, whispering right against your ear, "The look on his face when he realizes we aren't coming back for twelve hours would be exquisite."
Toji’s eyes narrowed behind the glass. He couldn't hear the whisper, but he knew Sukuna well enough to read the room. "Hey. Whatever he's telling you, it’s a lie. Babe, don't listen to him."
"He looks so cozy in there, doesn't he?" Sukuna continued, ignoring Toji entirely and focusing his full, intense attention on you. He reached out, his thumb tracing the line of your jaw to keep your eyes locked on his.
"Imagine it. We go back to the dorm. We finish that tea you stole from me. We watch a movie without him complaining about the plot. We can come back in the morning when he’s a little more... humble."
You looked from Sukuna’s tempting, devilish smirk to Toji, who was now standing up and tapping a frantic rhythm on the glass with his knuckles.
"Don't you dare walk out that door!" Toji barked, though his usual cool exterior was finally starting to crack under the threat of a night on a concrete slab. "Ryo, I will break your laptop when I get out. I swear on everything!!"
"See?" Sukuna chuckled, his grip on your waist tightening as he began to physically steer you back toward the exit. "He’s still got too much energy. He needs to simmer. Come on, let's go. It’ll be a fun story for the anniversary."
You looked at Toji’s desperate expression, then back to Sukuna’s chaotic grin. "Sukuna, we can't just leave our boyfriend in jail because you're bored!"
"We aren't leaving him 'in jail,'" Sukuna corrected smoothly, his hand already on the heavy exit door. "We're leaving him in time out. There’s a difference."
Ultimately, your conscience (and the thought of Toji’s revenge) won out. After a painful amount of paperwork and a dent in your savings that made your eyes water, the heavy iron gate finally buzzed open.
Toji sauntered out, rolling his shoulders and cracking his neck with a satisfied smirk, looking entirely too refreshed for someone who had just been in a holding cell.
"My savior," Toji rumbled, looping a heavy arm around your shoulders and pulling you into his side. He pressed a lingering, rough kiss to the top of your head, smelling of cheap station coffee and trouble. "I knew you wouldn't leave me to rot, even with the devil whispering in your ear."
"Don't get used to it," you grumbled, though you instinctively leaned into his warmth. "That bail money was supposed to be for my new textbooks."
"Books are overrated, princess. I’ll just tutor you," Toji joked, his hand sliding down to rest heavily on your waist.
"You? Tutor?" Sukuna scoffed, falling into step on your other side. He looked genuinely offended that his plan for a peaceful night had been foiled. "The only thing you can teach is how to lose a grand on a fixed horse race. You're a bad influence, and frankly, you're crowding the space."
"Funny, I don't remember asking for your opinion, Ryo," Toji shot back, his grin sharpening as he looked over your head at Sukuna. "In fact, I seem to remember you trying to convince her to abandon me. That’s a strike. Isn't that a strike, babe?"
"Both of you are on strikes," you warned, but they weren't listening.
As you walked back toward the dorms, the "honeymoon phase" of the rescue ended abruptly, replaced by the chaotic energy of two massive egos competing for your attention.
"Since I survived the 'trenches,' I get to pick the movie tonight," Toji declared, pulling you closer as if to claim territory. "And I want that expensive takeout from the place with the wagyu sliders."
"Surviving the trenches? You were in a suburban precinct for two hours, you dramatic leech," Sukuna snapped, reaching over to grab your hand and tugging you slightly toward him. "And no. We’re eating the snacks she bought, and you’re going to sit on the floor while I take the beanbag. You owe me for the stress of having to breathe the same air as the police."
"Stress? You were loving it!" Toji laughed, a deep, mocking sound. He leaned down, his lips brushing your ear. "Hey, ignore him. Tell him I’m your favorite for actually making life interesting. He’s just mad he didn't think of the gambling ring first."
"I wouldn't have been caught, that's the difference," Sukuna hissed, eyes flashing. He stepped in closer, his shoulder brushing yours. "Woman, tell this caveman to get his arm off you. He’s sweaty. It’s gross."
"I'm not sweaty, I'm 'glistening,'" Toji countered, purposefully rubbing his cheek against yours just to irritate Sukuna.
"Stop it!" you cried out, though a small, tired smile was tugging at your lips. "Both of you! If you don't stop bickering, I’m going to go sleep in my friend’s dorm and leave you two to fight over the beanbag yourselves."
"Fine," Sukuna muttered, before immediately whispering, "He’s still sitting on the floor, though."
