#awkship

if you asked him why, though, he couldn't explain it. laina arrives to class on time, smiles like she normally does, is perfectly polite to all the teachers and still blushes, rose dusted prettily across her cheeks, like she always has. there is nothing - at all - different about her or the way she acts.

except - except there is.

there is something, a small something that makes him hesitate when he looks at her. her eyes, always a hint of gray in them, looks more like december skies than of baby blue peonies. her smile, maybe, not as quite as wide, not as quite as frequent. she wears sweaters now, a little bit longer than they used to be, covering her wrists and draping over her. and is he just imagining it or do her eyes drift down more often than they used to, fixated on her shoes when no one is looking?

her fingers grasping the edges of her books, slightly ruddy red. her skin, a little paler, her eyes a little duller, her sweaters a little longer. these thoughts haunt miguel from time to time, when he has enough of a breath that he can think about something other than school or drama or his failing grade in psych class.

he wants to ask her, of course, if there is anything different. he wants to know if there's anything wrong, or if it's just all in his head. but whenever he racks up the courage to ask, like flowers filling his throat, no words can come out. instead he lets her talk about school and drama and clubs, let's her complain about her dad and about kianna, because at least it is nice listening to her voice --

(even as she pulls her sweater sleeves down, hiding a curve of something dark against her wrist --)

and is better than thinking about the thought that haunts him still:

it’s that he texts her once, but not much after thatand hes just too busy to visit herhe ends up accidentally dating jeanette, and he has prickles of doubt every now and then, but its fine, their relationship is fine, and he ends up marrying her

laina ends up marrying a boy named derek, who is cocky and arrogant in all the right ways, and who makes miguel's blood boil, but he doesn't know quite why. he tells himself its because derek doesn't treat her right. that he bullies her (even if it's out of love), and makes fun of her. (he doesn't tell himself that its because he hates the way derek makes her blush, and smile, and giggle in a way that's all too familiar). miguel gets invited to their wedding, and of course, he's laina's maiden of honor. jeanette is seething, of course, but he tells her that it's just because they're best friends. plus him and jeanette are married, he reminds her. she has nothing to worry about. 

All things considered, it could have gone worse. It was their first date - their very first date together, as a couple, but also independently too. When all you were doing was running away from legendary pokemon, making sure you didn't drown, and making sure your eggs didn't drown, it wasn't all that surprising that they hadn't been able to make time for each other. Plus, they'd been kind of postphoning it too. They'd been nervous. Nervous about themselves, about each other. How were first dates supposed to work? While they were at it, how did second dates work either?

In the end, it was a combination of Emmanuel's meddling, and their pokemon's exhasperation that got them both out the door, booked at a pizza place with a four-star rating (not a five-star one, because they couldn't afford that). They were nervous, they were awkward, they were stuttering.

But all in all, it went well.

They talked, they held hands over the table as they discussed the intricacies of Return of Crobatman, and made jokes about how Emmanuel had very blond hair, and Kianna liked to hover a little too much. The nervousness, the awkwardness, fell away into conversation that was just them:

We can't name our first child Lizalfos.

Lizzie's a cute name!

But Lizalfos..!

They were standing outside the venue, waiting for Laina's sister to come pick her up. She'd made up with her family, and she promised them that she'd spend at least a month or two at home before starting out on her journey again. After having spent years out in the wilderness, the girl was more than happy to come home. The only downside was not having Miguel with her.

"I guess... " She swallowed. "It's time to go?"

Miguel looked equally as nervous, brushing his blond bangs back and smoothing them over his too-gelled hair. Emmanuel had said gel would be a good idea. Emmanuel had been wrong.

"Y-yeah, " he agreed, stuttering. Softly, he added, "I had a good time."

Her cheeks warmed. "M-m-m-me too, Miguel."

The blond looked down at her, standing beside him, under the soft restaurant lighting. Oh Arceus was she pretty. He didn't think he'd ever get over how pretty she was, how kind...

"Miguel?" His heart stuttered when he realized that she'd noticed him staring at her. She was staring back at him, eyes bright and blue.

Oh great mew, I want to kiss her.

Steadying his hand on her shoulder, he leaned down to do just that, to kiss her, to slant his mouth over his. His palms were sweaty, nervous. His heart thudded anxiously in his chest. He was going to do it. He was going to kiss her. He was -

"Ow!"

Suddenly, something sharp bumped him in the head and he jerked his head upright. Laina's eyes, which had been closed in anticipation, suddenly fluttered open. She stared at him. "A-are you okay?" she exclaimed, worried, suddenly, flying towards him, her smaller hands brushing against his shirt.

Then:

"D-did you just hit your head?"

He felt his face go red. "T-the lamp was low..!"

She giggled, then laughed. He felt mortified. She kept on laughing, her hands going up to cup her mouth, hardly able to help herself. Miguel watched her, unable to say or do anything, feeling his face grow warmer and warmer still. "Listen, I - "

who is the person

you are destined

to be with?

part 1.

“Tomorrow.”

When Miguel at last shuffles back into the car, Emanuel glances at him through the rearview mirror. “Hot diggity dog, little brother. Are you finally gonna tell her?”

“You say that like it’s been ten years,” she laughs as they lean against the brick wall. He blinks at her. They’ve just finished eighth grade. His brow furrows for a moment, then he breaks into a grin. “It feels like I’ve known you for ten years.”

iv. Test week is here again. This time, when he approaches her at the library, he does it confidently—they are friends now. He rests the book on the table and patiently waits for her to notice him standing there. When she does so, he grins.

“Ah,” she says, grinning back. “Need any help on science?”

“Not today. But, I was wondering… do you want to study together? Not here,” he adds quickly, tucking the book under his arm. “There’s a coffee shop a few blocks away, Eman’s been there. He said it’d be a nice place to study… if you would care to join me, Miss Li?”

…

b. But that’s not the only victory that comes. After that day, there are other ones. The first quiz they get is only ten questions. It’s terrifying - get one or two wrong and you’re automatically bumped down a letter grade. As she puts pencil to paper (she hasn’t yet figured out the elegance of a pen), she is shaking with nervousness, tense like a soda can ready to pop.  When they get the quiz back, and she sees a 9/10 sketched onto the corner of the page like it’s a blessing, and the smiley face that comes with it, she laughs out of relief and looks to her left, inexplicably looking for that blond boy that she’d met on the very first day of school.

His name is Miguel Smirnov, and he’s tall and gangly even though they’re barely grown. Most of the boys in their class haven’t hit puberty yet and are loud like it makes up for all of it. But Miguel is different. He is quiet. While the rest of their classmates are rushing around comparing grades, Laina watches as he tucks his paper neatly into his bright green folder. He does it like it’s a mistake, like someone might catch him, and Laina does - but it’s not a failing grade, like she was expecting, but a perfect mark. The feeling that overcomes her is something between pride and jealousy, both of which are ridiculous, because she barely knows him.

After that, Laina studies like her life depends on it. She has the highest marks in the class which - naturally - has earned a lot of new “friends”. 

She’s sitting in the corner of the library, hiding from classmates who want to know the answer to Mr. Figgs bonus question for the test coming up without trying. People have been oddly nice to her ever since they found out she does so well in class and Laina is a nice person, so she doesn’t mind helping. But there is a big difference between helping and giving, and when the last of them leave, she is relieved.

However, a flash of yellow makes her look up again - it’s Miguel.  When they first met, it was in the dark but he looks pretty in the light too. A smile tips her mouth as he comes up to her, “Miguel, right?” It is the first time she’s said his name but the word came out easily, comfortably, like putting on an old t-shirt.  When she realizes this, her ears go red and she opens her mouth to apologize, to introduce herself, but he doesn’t seem to notice.