#awful date

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Ehehe. Jen.

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Q was honestly debating bashing his head against the table in a desperate escape bid.

Michael was mindnumbingly tedious. A lawyer with a perfectly good balance sheet and absolutely nothing to talk about beyond himself and his very, very small world. Q had managed to get as far as explaining that 'Q' was indeed his real name (legally, anyway) and that he worked in the civil service, but that was about it.

“... and got a first, of course, expected nothing less...”

“Yes, I got a starred first, top of the year,” Q dropped in, spearing the last of his bland chicken dish, “and I started uni three years early.”

Michael paused for one moment, looking utterly affronted.

“Never mind,” Q completed, and ate the chicken. Michael took one more second to be offended, and then returned back to his own university successes with gusto.

“Q?”

The voice came from behind him; Q twisted around curiously, Michael half-oblivious in the midst of his own story, and saw a man he didn't even vaguely recognise. “Yes?”

“Q! I knew it was you. How are you?” the man said brightly, and leaned in, covering his whisper in Q's ear: “Follow my lead.”

Relief struck through Q's entire body, rippling. “Hello! I'm great, thanks, it's been ages, hasn't it?”

“Year or two, I think,” the man nodded, grinning.

Q noticed, very abruptly, that the man just happened to be fucking gorgeous. Blonde, blue eyes, muscular, toned, just, everything Q could ever want in a man was staring at him and saving him from the ultimate Date From Hell.

“... nnga,” Q managed.

“Q?” Michael asked from behind him, voice distinctly frosty. “Care to introduce me?”

The stranger looked over to Michael, and flashed a grin. “Bond. James Bond. Q and I, we go way back, don't we?”

“Yep,” Q agreed, not really trusting himself to speak all that much. This was not his area of expertise. “Way back.”

“Actually, I know this is going to sound a bit bizarre,” Bond said slowly, “but I was actually planning to get in touch with you again. I've been... thinking. And I was stupid to let you go so easily.”

Q was fairly certain he'd started to blush up to his hairline, and then continuing across his entire scalp, crimson. “You...”

“I miss you, Q,” Bond continued, fixing aforementioned blue eyes on Q, and causing another strange whimpery sort of noise to occur. “And it breaks my heart to see you with another man, even somebody as clearly worthy as him.”

(Michael was beginning to get the idea that perhaps the date was nearing an end).

“I...”

“Take me back, Q. Forgive me.”

“... I should probably be off,” Michael announced, already standing, out of his depth and extremely eager to disappear as soon as possible; the new arrival was not somebody he could hope to compete with, and Q was visibly being unspooled by him. “It was nice to get to know you a bit, Q. If you ever change your mind...”

“He'll know where to find you,” Bond completed coolly, effectively dismissing the other man.

Michael left.

“... thank you,” Q managed, when words started to happen again. “You just...”

“Would you like to share dessert with me?” Bond asked, cutting Q off. “I'm not expecting anything, I won't be offended – only, I could overhear most of your conversation. I'm eating alone. And you're both extremely attractive and very intelligent.”

Another slightly garbled sound from Q, which managed to make the shape of: “yes please, that would be lovely,” although the coherence was debatable.

New Post has been published on https://kidsviral.info/these-six-major-signs-prove-that-your-date-isnt-going-well/

These Six Major Signs Prove That Your Date Isn't Going Well.

We’ve all had a bad date. If you say you haven’t, you are delusional and in denial.

That said, there are always a few tell-tale signs that your date is going downhill fast. Through my empirical research conducted in the field for many years, I’ve concluded that the following are signs that your date is going poorly.

She keeps bringing up her ex.

datedaily

This means one thing. She is not over her ex. If she can’t stop talking about what an awful or awesome guy he was, it’s bad news for any future you would have with this girl. It’s like that person who says that they hate the new Taylor Swift song, but every time you’re around that friend, they sing it. If you hate it so much, why is it always on your mind? It’s because deep down, you love it. That doesn’t bode well for dates or Taylor Swift songs.

She “needs to leave early.”

therapycounseling

If you’ve been on the date for 5 minutes and all you did is introduce yourself, and she brings up how she has to leave soon…oh boy, things are not looking good for you. Every few minutes, she checks her watch or phone to see what time it is. It’s like she is hoping to develop superpowers that grant her the ability to speed up time, because she can’t wait for it to be over fast enough.

Lots of silences.

sistergrimm

These happen on first dates all the time. Sometimes it’s because of nerves. Other times it’s because your date isn’t interested in anything you have to offer. There is a difference between the cute “I’m nervous” awkward silences and the “I have nothing to say to you” awkward silences. The difference is pretty obvious to spot as well.

She is on/checking her phone.

flyygirletiquettebook

Your date is constantly checking her phone. She is waiting for any kind of reason to ditch you and return to her safe house, away from you. Sometimes girls even enact a plan where they get a friend to call them in the middle of a date with an “emergency” so they can leave the date early. Other girls will just text the friends they’d rather hang out with or the guys they’d rather be on dates with. If the phone makes many cameos on your dates, it’s over before it even began.

She asks no questions about you.

datedaily

All your date wants to do is talk about herself. By the end of the meal, you know her favorite band, how many times she’s seem them in concert, who her favorite member is, where her grandmother lived, what country her grandmother migrated from, who her best friend is, what her best friend does for a living, how much she goes to yoga, how she thinks yoga is a scam, how she thinks the President is a part of the Illuminati, how she thinks the Illuminati are following her everywhere, how racist her parents are, her favorite TV shows, who writes her favorite TV shows, what else the writer of her favorite TV show has done, her dog, and how her dog humps everyone’s legs. All she knows about you is that you’re paying the bill for this date.

She spits on you and tells you she hates you.

reddit

Finally, this is a pretty sure-fire sign that the date didn’t go well. I’ve never had a girl spit in my face and tell me she hates me and end up on a second date. It happens to the best of us though. Wait…this doesn’t happen to a lot of people? Just me? Well, whoops! Revealing a little bit of personal information…

There you have it. If you see anything like these happen on your date, you’re probably on a pretty bad date. Take it from me, the guy who people spit on and say they hate! One day…

These Six Major Signs Prove That Your Date Isn’t Going Well.

We’ve all had a bad date. If you say you haven’t, you are delusional and in denial. That said, there are always a few tell-tale signs that your date is going downhill fast. Through my empirical research conducted in the field for many years, I’ve concluded that the following are signs that your date is going poorly. She keeps bringing up her ex. datedaily This means one thing. She is not over her…

These Six Major Signs Prove That Your Date Isn’t Going Well.

We’ve all had a bad date. If you say you haven’t, you are delusional and in denial.

That said, there are always a few tell-tale signs that your date is going downhill fast. Through my empirical research conducted in the field for many years, I’ve concluded that the following are signs that your date is going poorly.

She keeps bringing up her ex.

datedailyThis means one thing. She…

I’m going to start off by apologizing to actual bisexual women, I’m so sorry that this group of people gives you such a bad rap with the rest of the LGBT+ community, probably contributes to Bi invisibility and all around makes everyone unhappy.

But I really needed somewhere to rant about this, so ya’ll can just ignore this next bit if the title rubs you the wrong way.

I matched with and started talking to a chick on tinder a few days ago, we had a lot of the same interests and really hit it off. She explained in her profile that she was in a heterosexual monogamous relationship and was just looking for friends (as she hadn’t made any since moving to the area). We talk for a bit and she invited me to meet up with her for a friend date.

I’m over here thinking ‘this is great! I also have had a hard time finding people to befriend, since I only have 3 co-workers and they’re all in their 60′s’ so I agree we should meet and suggest a place to go (since she had not specified a time or place).

Should not have done that apparently.

She shoots that idea down since it’s inconvenient and says that she has other plans that day. I’m like ‘ok, that’s fair, she basically just met me, whatever’ but she then precedes to expect me to make the new arrangements as well (which she also shoots down) and then a THIRD time (which she finally says will work)

I’m like ‘whoo, glad that’s sorted, I hate planning shit’ when she messages me with:

“Oh by the way, I’m bringing my husband with me because I don’t know the area and don’t feel safe, you should bring someone with you too”

-_____-

You don’t feel safe meeting me (a noodle twig) in a well-lit public area on a Friday night in the middle of downtown with hundreds of people both inside and outside of said venue.

But, that’s fine, I get it, she’s not comfortable and having him there will make her feel better, legit. But my other partner already has a date planned that night (not that she could know that) so I say as much and her response is:

“OK, well, lets make plans for when you’re s/o is free as well”

Wait, am I now expected to plan a date to go on with a couple? I’m poly and all, but I’m not into guys or hetero couples (I’m not looking for a couple to date right now anyway)

I ask my s/o what they think, and their first response is ‘bait and switch’

I’m pissed

I feel taken advantage of because she oh so sneakily turned our ‘friend date’ into a ‘come meet me and my husband so we can have sex with you later’ and I didn’t even realize it was happening.

Like, can you not?

If she had just plainly said in the beginning, ‘my husband will accompany me everywhere’ (like a security blanket) I would never have swiped left and wasted both of our time. I’m so fed up with the couples hunting for threesomes and advertising it like ‘looking for friends and maybe more ;) ‘, ‘looking for cool girl to hang with’, etc etc. Just say that you wanna bang a stranger and be done with it! It’s also a pain for someone in my position that WOULD normally be open to dating a couple, but can’t trust anyone because they never want to date/get to know’ me, they just want to fuck.

This was by far the most deceptive move I’ve ever gotten from one of these couples though, and I’m more angry with myself for falling for it.

These Six Major Signs Prove That Your Date Isn’t Going Well.

We’ve all had a bad date. If you say you haven’t, you are delusional and in denial.

That said, there are always a few tell-tale signs that your date is going downhill fast. Through my empirical research conducted in the field for many years, I’ve concluded that the following are signs that your date is going poorly.

She keeps bringing up her ex.

datedailyThis means one thing. She…