#anguiliform

whwnever i take melatonin supplements i always spend 2 or 3 hours waving my limbs in the air on my bed

until i melt off onto the flor

and find the most unconfortable place by my roller skates       and rest my head on the wheels & u can take all the tosses and the turns and add em up til u get a number i dont feel like counting to

but if you want to you can,

and thats what being an insomniac is like; when 6mg of klonopin dopes you up enough just to forget that you couldnt sleep the night before

and then it starts again &again &again & possibly again but in the backof your mind(or the front)

yoou just know

that the rollerskates'll roll away from you like that precious moment of rem just before you wkae up

to another ddying  day

i’m always afraid of people reading my mind and reading theirs as well or an illusion of doing so a vooice in the centre of my skull  telling me the feelings of others toward me and it’s a harsher inhale than an unfiltered djarumm black clove sometimez to know that you’re going fuckign insane while everyone watches the oversized 10 year old walk in the gas station to buy a 30 pack of pbr cuz 15 bucks is his budget for the week.   but wy the fuck should i care about some newsstory that’ll be dead history in about 5 few seconds after that third toke of dimethyltryptamine   “i’m not the kind of addict you think i am,” i should have said when my 6th grade math teacher took the bag of sugar out of my backpack and thought it was coke but instead i said  what 6th grader would have a fuckin kilo of coke in his backpack at school?   and i still laugh at my distorted images of those memories like the way it feels when you’re not real but from a 3d view in a 2 dimensional scenerio   because everything happened so weirdly]when i  think about it, and the timeline starts lookin the way it did last year, when you realise that the entire world, the whole meaning of existence is so fucking weird already,   it’s frightening sometimes, how nothing really exists at all.