(She's) Perfect- Jungkook
Summary: Different inflection, when you say my name. Kiss me, but your kiss don't feel the same Genre: Angst Warnings: Lovers to exes
NOT PROOFREAD PLEASE DON'T KILL ME FOR ANY MISTAKES.
You hadn't meant to listen.
It was a total coincidence honestly. You always trusted Jungkook with all your heart but now you weren't so sure of it. You were only passing by the studio door when you heard Jungkook's voice from inside and then some girls name and your whole world stopped, making you freeze with your hand above the doorknob.
"I miss her" followed by deadly silence. Then a quiet laugh from your boyfriend. Something insde of you twisted on your chest and you've never felt so small. You had to leave, so you stepped away from the door and walked down the hallway as fast as you could. You wanted to believe you heard wrong, you thought you two were happy, but maybe you were the only one to feel that way.
You started distancing yourself little by little, trying to find a way to approach him with what you heard, however, you just couldn't and Jungkook noticed immediately something was wrong.
"You okay?" but you'd only nod
"Yeah, everything's fine"
You started noticing more things as the days went by: the late night texts he angled away from you; the way he would smile at his phone; the exhausted excuses
"I'm busy" "I'll be working late" "Don't wait for me early"
Every answer felt so rehearsed and the worst part was that she hated herself for doubting him. You wanted to trust him, you really did, but every time you'd close your eyes, you'd heart it
I miss her
A week later you found a new perfume. A sweet and floral scent lingered on Jungkook's jacket when he returned home one night. Late per usual.
You stood frozen in your shared bedroom as he tossed the jacket onto a chair. The smell wasn't yours. You knew every pergume you owned and this wasn't among them. The scent wrapped around you like a ghost, a reminder that maybe someone else had been close enough to leave traces behind; close enough to touch him. That's the part that hurts the most to you.
One evening, Jungkook found you sitting alone in the dark of your living room. Tv was off, the apartment was silent and he could hear your small sobs, making his heart drop instantly.
"Babe?" You didn't hear ackowledge his presence, so hearing his voice caugh you by surprise and you wiped your eyes as fast as you could, even though it was too late. He rushed over to your side. "What's wrong?" The question shattered whatever compuser you had left
"Who is she?" His expression changed in a heartbeat but in a confused one.
"What do you mean?"
"The one you're cheating on me with" your voice cracked. "the one whose name you said; the one who gave you the perfume you wear most times now; the one you spend your late nights with; the one ou share hidden texts" Jungkook's face went pale and for the first time you saw realization hit him.
"Oh"
Oh. The sound of your heart breaking. He wasn't surprised or confused. He was feeling guilty. You could see remorse cross is face as he looked at you. In the immense chaos mixed with tears, you laughed bitterly
"My God. There really is someone. I'm not-- God Jungkook, how could you?" you said getting up
"No, Y/n"
"STOP! Please, stop lying to me! I can't handle it anymore" The words came out as a sob. "Just tell me the truth for once, dammit"
The room felt unbearably quiet with Jungkook looking devastated in it, as if he was the one breaking apart. You couldn't bring yourself to care though, you're the victim here and God knows how much you hate that words, but that's exactly how you felt. Your entire world was collapsing and he was the main reason behind it.
"I heard you say her name in the studio. You said you missed her" Jungkook's eyes widened as you spoke and for a long moment, neither of you spoke until Jungkook closed his eyes and you understood that as the answer you needed. Something inside you finally snapped and a broken laugh escaped your lips as tears streamed down your face.
"Get out" His eyes widened right away
"Y/n, no- "
"Get. Out. Now!"
"Please just let me explain. You'll understand"
"Now you wanna talk? Now you wanna explain? No Jungkook" You shook your head violently. "I've spent weeks trying to explain this away for you. I've spent weeks convincing myself I was crazy, that I was imagining things, that I was being insecure"
"You're not understanding Y/n, I-"
"I UNDERSTAND ENOUGH" The hurt in your voice seem to wound him, but apparently not enough. Nothing could make up for how broken you felt. "You miss her, you said so yourself" Jungkook stepped closer to you but you pushed him away.
"It isn't what you think"
"Then what is it? Becase from where I'm standing it looks exactly like what I think" He was about to say something but then his mouth closed and see him hesitate was all you needed. You point towards the door. "See? You can't even deny it" His eyes filled with panic
"Y/n please, don't -"
"Don't make me say it again"
The apartment fell silent and for a moment neither of you moved. Then, Jungkook slowly nodded and after taking a look at you one last time he said those three words that always made you go weak
I love you
A few seconds later you heard the front door close. And then you were alone
The next days were unbereable.
The apartment felt too quiet and too full of memories. You blocked his number the first night. Unblocked it the next morning only to block it again after seeing sixteen missed calls. Then came the texts
Jungkook: Please talk to me You didn't let me explain I promise you it's not that you think
You ignored every single one of them.
Days became weeks and weeks became almost a month and Jungkook never stopped trying to reach out. Flowers arrived every week, letters arrived day yes day no. Even your mutual friends would check on you constantly. You were refusing all of it because if you answered even once, you knew your heart would betray you because you still love him.
One afternoon, you sat in your best friends apartment, curled beneath a blanket while absentmindedly stirring your coffee as your friend watched you carefully.
"Why are you punishing yourself? It's clear you still love him" You sigh
"That's not the point"
"It kind of is" You rolled your eyes
"He cheated on me"
"Did he really?" The question made you look up
"What do you mean by that?" Your friend leaned back.
"I don't want you to think I'm defending him" you scoffed
"Sounds like you are"
"Well I am not, I'm just saying something doesn't add up. Did he admit to it?"
"He said oh" The memory made your stomach twist. Your friend continued.
"So? That's not a confirmation Y/n" the answer annoyed you
"It felt like it"
"But you DON'T know" You opened your mouth just to close it again, because as much as you hated hearing it, she wasn't wrong. You never actually heard him confess. He never said he cheated and you definitely never gave him a chance to explain. The realization sat heavily in your chest.
"Look. If he's guilty then you'll know" you stared down at your coffee
"And if he isn't?"
"Then you've both been suffering for no reason" Silence has settled between you.
A month has passed and all the things he did to reach you start passing through your mind: the flowers, the letters, the desperation in his eyes when he stood at your door. For the first time since that night, doubt crept into your certainty. Your friend reached for your hand across the table.
"Maybe it's time to hear what he was trying so hard to tell you"
And for the first time in weeks, you found yourself wondering if you had made a mistake
I was listening to Perfect by Selena Gomez and I just had to write something out of it. Love this song so much and you know how much I love some angsty shit.
Either way, I hope you like it and let me know if you want a part 2
Love you ❤
