#andperry

No hope, no love, no glory, no happy ending.

This is the way that we love, like its forever

Then live the rest of our lives, but not together”

Crying hitting my head on the wall

just so hard and he looks up and Neil is just gaping at him so he immediately goes into apology overload about i'm so sorry I probably ruined everything you don't have to be friends with me anymore you don't even have to see me anymore if you don't want to I'll leave you alone I promise but Neil instead of running away like he expected just gives him the biggest hug and tells him it's okay that everything is okay and he just holds him. And eventually Charlie stops crying and he just thanks Neil for being there and not hating him and Neil just gets this small smile on his face and tells him that now might be horrible timing but he's always sort of thought of Charlie as more than a friend to him and Charlie is shocked because there's no way one of his crushes likes him back but only a second later he gets really worried because what about Todd and Neil just lets out a soft laugh and says Todd knows and actually he feels the same way about you that I do but neither of us wanted to tell you and Charlie can't believe it because there's no way but Neil tells him he's not lying and Charlie looks him in the eyes and he can tell he's telling the truth so he just lets out this breathless laugh and Neil smiles at him and suddenly everything is okay again. And they both stay sitting together on the floor for a few more minutes before Neil stands up and offers his hand to Charlie and says come on I think there's a small talk we should have with Todd. And they all just sit together and talk through everything and there are some tears involved but they all decide that they all care about each other and it may not work and it may be messy at times but they all just want to at least try and once the conversation is over they've all got the biggest smiles on their faces and Charlie just shyly asks if he can kiss them and Todd and Neil give each other a quick smile before turning back to Charlie and saying yes and Charlie just instantly hugs both of them so hard before pulling back and quickly kissing Neil and then Todd and then buries his head into Todd's shoulder while still having the tightest grip on both of them and just says "I'm so lucky. How am I so lucky" and from then on everything is perfect and wonderful and they couldn't be happier.

things i realized while creating this:

a) alignment charts are difficult.

neil: that's my boyfriend !

meeks: your husband, neil.

I wrote a Dead Poets Society: Andperry one-shot, and I'd love for y'all to read it. It's set in their world, but it's a bit of an AU.

ʷᵒʳᵈ ᶜᵒᵘⁿᵗ 9828

ᵈᵉˢᶜʳᶦᵖᵗᶦᵒⁿ Neil and Todd meet during a Welton vs Balincrest soccer match. They're inseparable from then on, every Friday spent together. After a while, feelings ensue, and dumb decisions are made.

ᵒⁿ ᵃᵒ³ https://archiveofourown.org/works/11354961

ʷᵒʳᵈ ᶜᵒᵘⁿᵗ 1728

ˢᵘᵐᵐᵃʳʸ Neil has a new Polaroid camera. Todd likes to draw. And the two boys end up being each other's muses.

ᵒⁿ ᵃᵒ³ https://archiveofourown.org/works/11368299

Once he'd finally received his Polaroid at the post office near town, he had to keep it a secret.

Not only would the school be up in arms about it, but he was sure that the rest of his friends would want to steal it for themselves. Luckily, he'd spent quite a lot of money on buying refills so that his friends could all try it out. It was expensive, but his parents were well off after his dad got a new job.

He mostly started by taking pictures of the views around Welton. The ominous fog in the early mornings, the pink sunrises, the clear days, and even sometimes the church. He moved on to taking photos of Meeks' succulents that his parents had brought from Africa after going there on an expedition (his mom was an archaeologist and his dad was writing an anthropological paper on the natives), and then stacks of books and papers that were scattered around. He kept all of the photos in his drawer, in a hollowed out book that he also hid his smokes in.

Somehow, Todd wasn't aware of his recent Polaroid adventures. He was, after all, very much stuck in his own universe. Although, he did often pay attention to Neil and whatever he was doing. In fact, Todd would go so far as to say that the only person he really cared about getting to know was Neil. His other friendships all just happened.

Todd was the first person Neil took a picture of.

He was lying on his bed, in a sea of papers and notes and scribbled out words. A single pad of lined paper lay on his lap, and a pencil was in his hand, tapping against the page in thought. The way his jaw clenched. The almost dramatic lighting from the sun through the window. It all seemed too perfect not to photograph.

So with a loud click, flash, and soft processing noise, Neil took a Polaroid of his best friend.

Todd immediately looked up in surprise. Who wouldn't?

"D-did you just take a picture of me-me?" He appeared rather shocked, and Neil thought it was a cute expression on him.

The dark haired boy just nodded with a grin, plucking the small picture from the camera, before beginning to shake it.

"Wh-why?"

"'Thought you looked quite nice." He admitted, standing from his seat so that he could place the photograph in the drawer, because they processed better in the dark.

He placed his camera down, and when he returned to sit on his bed, he saw the way Todd's cheeks were tinted pink. Another cute expression on him.

"Th-thanks." A small smile appeared on his lips, but he didn't look up at his friend, only at the page in his lap. "Wanna see something?"

Neil noticed that Todd was stuttering less and less around him, which made him happy. Todd really only stuttered when he was anxious, scared, flustered, or surprised. All of these feelings were usually experienced around Neil, but at least Todd felt comfortable being with him.

"Sure." Neil nodded eagerly, since he had nothing much to do, and pretty much everything involving what Todd did and said seemed God given to him. It must have been the rose tinted glasses... that, or Todd was just that brilliant.

Todd moved all of his clutter into a messy pile on his pillow, and then reached under his bed to grab another notebook. Neil recognised it as his art book. He didn't take the subject, but Nuwanda did. He'd also seen Todd hunched over it, but had never had the opportunity to see inside.

Todd patted the sheets next to him, silently gesturing for his friend to sit there. And Neil obliged, sitting right next to Todd, their knees brushing as they sat cross-legged next to eachother.

The blonde opened his book, turning over the first few pages until he landed on his two favourite ones. He'd started drawing the human form, and he was quite into it (he thought he was rather good at it, too).

Neil studied each of the drawings with wide and surprised eyes, his lips parting in quiet shock. Todd drew women's bodies flawlessly for someone who had little to no experience with them, and did other sketches of mostly boys. A man standing like a Roman conquerer (chest out and left arm up in a dramatic pointing gesture), and legs and heads and arms all depicted separately. Neil's favourites, though, were interlocked hands (one that, in his mind, resembled his own, but realistically could be anyone's), two boys hugging tight (bodies shuffled close to each other), and a boy's back (spine protruding and shoulder blades angular under his skin, as his back hunched over in a prayer-like manner).

"What do you think?" Todd asked softly, timidly, obviously afraid of Neil's reaction.

"I love them." Neil answered honestly, and his friend must have sensed the sincerity in his voice, because he didn't push for any more conformation on his part.

Todd noticed that Neil didn't want to seem to look away, staring at every line that the pencil etched, and every curve that Todd created. He pulled his writing pad back onto his lap, and allowed his friend to take in his art on his own time.

He'd edited one of his many poems, when he heard Neil clear his throat.

Todd looked up at him, and watched as Neil's eyes trailed from his own, to the page.

Todd flushed bright red immediately.

His drawings of Neil had been on the next page, and Neil had gotten curious, obviously finding them. I mean, sure, some of the others were of him too, but those were noticeably him. Especially since the pages were titled with Neil I and Neil II.

The first one was harmless, just his face, drawn to the t, with every detail imaginable. It made Neil think about how long it must have taken to get every feature perfect. It also made him wonder how long Todd had been staring at his face to get it right. He smiled at the thought. There was another of his whole body; his whole tall, confident, lean stature in one picture, standing proudly in his school uniform (his right hand balanced the flag of Excellence on its pole). Another (and dear God, Todd wanted to crawl into some dark corner and die), was of Neil standing by his desk, shirtless from just getting out of the shower. Todd cringed at himself. And that wasn't even the worst. There were drawings of his lips, several ones of his eyes, hands, legs. Of him doing mundane things like reading. One specific drawing was of him lying in bed, back arched off of the sheets in a very sexual manner, and Neil couldn't even begin to imagine what Todd thought of enough to draw it. But he was, in fact, glad.

The last one took up about half of the second page, and had always been Todd's favourite. It had Neil in his theatre clothes, and was drawn from a picture that he'd gotten from the theatre's photographer, who was working on taking said photos for advertising. He had Puck's crown on, and he was looking up into a light, speaking his lines with sincerity like he always did. He looked beautiful, but then again, like said before, he always did. Todd had watched that practice, and snatched up the photograph as soon as he could.

"I-I don't know what to say." Neil admitted, pausing, but Todd couldn't find the words to say either, so he carried on. "But thank you, Todd, they really are quite beautiful... the drawings." He admitted, and although truthful, he was really just trying to make his roommate feel better.

"I'm so sorry." Was all Todd replied, sad and quiet as he took the book from Neil's hands, shutting it slowly, seemingly ignoring what the other boy had just said to him. "I shouldn't have been drawing you like that. I'm such a creep." He talked himself down.

"Woah, Todd." Neil stopped him, a hand coming up to rest on his shoulder, grabbing the boy's attention. Todd's lashes fluttered as he looked at Neil through them, clearly embarrassed, almost ashamed. "I think they're wonderful. You've got an amazing talent, and I'm just flattered that I'm your muse."

Todd turned even pinker than he already was, and looked away from his friend.

Neil moved his hand from Todd, sighing almost inaudibly.

"I really do like them." He promised. "The one of me as Puck is my favourite."

Todd looked back up at him, hope starting to rear its head. "Really?" He asked in a whisper.

"Really." He confirmed. "But all of them-" He placed emphasis on his words. "-are incredible."

"You aren't creeped out?" Todd furrowed his eyebrows in something close to confusion.

Neil shook his head. "Thank you." He placed a soft kiss to Todd's pink cheek, before pulling away to look into pretty blue eyes.

"Oh, wow." Todd's hand shot up to touch the place that his friend had just kissed. "I-it's a pleasure."

Neil's lips curved into a grin, and before he knew what his body was doing, he had already left a short kiss on Todd's lips, then another, and another. And eventually Todd caught up, pulling Neil in by his shirt collar so that the kiss would last for more than a moment. Their lips slotted together like they'd been born to do only that, and both boys felt something oddly blissful. Tingling, exciting, surprising, new. When they pulled away, Neil left one more gentle kiss on Todd's forehead, before bringing him into a warm hug.

"Don't think I didn't miss that shirtless one of me, though." He murmured into Todd's hair. He felt a nervous laugh against his chest, sending vibrations through his body.

When they pulled apart, they were both as happy as a person could possibly be. "And that one of me on my bed? You're a dirty minx, Todd Anderson." He joked, which made Todd laugh in that sweet way he always did.

This time Todd had the courage to lean forward and kiss Neil, soft, and slow, and everything he'd ever wanted.