2019 has been a pretty challenging year for me. I started it being scared and anxious about everything, and I ended it single, with new career goals and surrounded by my best friends. Here are 20 lessons (100% tested and approved) that I learned along the way!

1. People only show their best sides to you but you would be amazed by how many people share the same feelings as you

2. If you feel like you can’t be yourself around a certain group of people, then you’re hanging out with the wrong group

3. Notice people who make you feel energized and happy VS people who drain all your energy. It’ll change your life.

4. You don’t need to justify yourself when you say « no » to something

5. However, you should say yes more often to spontaneous proposals and experiences

6. Honesty is a sign of respect

7. If you don’t give your 100% to something then you’ll be less likely to get that 100% back

8. Choose flaws over qualities. Your dream job also consists in not-so-dreamy parts, and this is what you should consider when choosing your career. The same applies with friends/lovers.

9. The person you sit in front of at the library can become one of your best friends (true story for me)

10. 99% of the scenarios you imagine in your head will never happen

11. Changing starts within YOUR thoughts and how you react to them.

12. Just because you’re offended it doesn’t mean that you’re right

13. Keep a critical eye to everything you hear/see.

14. Being vulnerable is a sign of strenght and not a sign of weakness

15. You can cope with a lot more than you think

16. Your life can totally change in a year and you can be a whole different person only if you’re willing too

17. Cherish what you already have in your life, happiness lies in gratitude

18. Wanting to be perfect for others will only make you seem a boring and hypocrite person

19. The habits you adopt now will define the person you’ll be in the future

20. Be curious. Read books, listen to podcasts, travel (even in your country), and talk to new people

You may be thinking you’re a fraud, that you don’t deserve to be where you are and that you’re totally incompetent. You think that what you’ve accomplished is only due to luck or because « anyone could have done it ». You only focus on the small mistakes you made instead of being proud of what you’ve achieved and, as a consequence, you feel like a total failure. Well, this is how I feel 99% of the time and tbh we’re a lot out there to feel the same way. 

This post is for us, for the perfectionists and for all the people that set ridiculously high expectations for themselves. Performance anxiety  is part of our daily lives and even if it forces us to do a great job most of the time, the darker side of it is that it can totally make us sick in a psychological and even in a physical way. For me perfectionism was a huge shield that I used to carry around to protect myself from any criticism, judgment or shame. Well, guess what, it didn’t work. AT. ALL. 

There are a lot of reasons that may have caused me and you to think like that, it can be so engraved in our beliefs that we don’t even question it. We just believe it 100%. But the good news is that it can be fixed. 

What can you do to slowly change this belief and finally starting realizing that you deserve to be where you are? Here is what I’ve learnt throughout the years : 

Acknowledge your thoughts and how they make you feel. Once you’ve identified these thoughts, you can observe them and question them : how do they make you feel ? From a scale from 1 to 10, how much do you believe these thoughts? What makes you think they are true? Don’t you think they are a bit exaggerated? How can you reframe them in order to make you feel better about yourself? 

Talk about it. Last week I had to call a friend because I was feeling like shit just because I couldn’t answer to a simple question from my professor. She reassured me and reminded me that lots of people feel like that. 

Practice positive feedback. Write down the good things you did during that day, even the smallest ones. By doing that, your brain will recognize them more easily and you’ll pay more and more attention to them 

Comparison is the thief of joy, and most of the time we compare ourselves to the embellished and flawless version of the people we meet and/or see on social media. We tend to forget that EVERYONE can have self-doubt and feelings of not being good enough. Like come on, even Albert Einstein didn’t think his work deserved all that attention! 

Be patient. It takes lots of time and energy to reframe and change beliefs we’ve had for such a long time. But knowing we have them and that we can change them is a great start :) 

This is the first (and I hope the last) time in our lives where everything is shut down, where meetings are forbidden, and where the future is shaped day by day. Despite the fact that I’m really lucky and grateful to live in a country such as Switzerland, which didn’t suffer as much as some other countries and where the lockdown was less severe, my mind still went through different phases. And besides learning how to bake banana bread and realizing I don’t need a gym to do proper workouts, I wanted to make a list of everything this really special situation taught me.

Medicine is definitely the career I want to pursue. I’ve been in a really confusing place last year where I kept wondering if being a doctor would make me fulfilled and happy and if it was the right choice for me. But when the #covid started in Switzerland, I couldn’t imagine myself staying at home and wait for it to pass, and I was thrilled when I knew I could help! I spent 5 weeks volunteering at the hospital, the situation got better really quickly and I hadn’t so much work to do in the end, but I’ve never felt more in my element than during these 5 weeks.

Another thing that amazed me is the sense of #community that emerged from all the confusion created. All the volunteers, associations, but also platforms, crowdfunding and social media dedicated to the help of the most vulnerable and healthcare workers really made me proud and hopeful for our future.

Another area of my life that was really affected : relationships. I discovered that I needed connection more than I wanted to admit. I always thought I was ok in doing things on my own but I had a really hard time finding the right balance and I think I’m finally getting somewhere. On the other hand, I feel like I’ve never had so many friends in my entire life : I reinforced my relations with lots of people, made new friends and opened up with people I never thought I would.

I also learned a lot about myself, since this kind of situation makes introspection inevitable. Some old memories arose and confronted my current reality. I questioned lots of aspects of my life, and really took the time to analyse what I was lacking in my life in order to feel this sense of « wholeness » I was apparently lacking. I did lots of journaling, and figured out new projects I wanted to work on, new goals and I also redefined some of my priorities and I think I’m finally finding a new, more accurate and exciting balance.

Last thing that I learned during this quarantine : how I cope with stressful situations. I figured out I was handling my stress and feelings in healthier ways than I used to. I wasn’t trying to numb my feelings but allowed myself to actually *feel* and then let go… I now know that I’m able to handle critical situations and that I’ll always find my way out of difficult times.

Today was a rainy day and it was perfect to chill amd relax a bit before another new week starts!! 🍂🍁✨

What did you do this weekend?

Exams are getting closer and now is the perfect time to create a solid study plan to get motivated and be productive. Here are some tips to help you making your study plan!

You don’t need a fancy planner. You can just use Excel to create it as you like and it will be more than enough!

Make a list of all the topics you have to study and gather similar subjects in the same category. Then, classify them by priority order.

Estimate the amount of time you’ll need to study each topic. Don’t underestimate it : you have to take all the time you need to understand and memorize, otherwise you’ll end up rushing things up and not being productive enough. I remember adding 1 hour more than I thought I would need so I could have plenty of time to go deeper in the subject without stressing myself out.

Know when you’re the most effective and do the hardest tasks in that moment. Keep the lighter subjects for the rest of the day. When I was doing my first med school year I would always study chemistry and physics in the mornings and the rest in the afternoon and evening !

Plan your breaks and meals. If you want to watch an episode from your favorite TV show, plan it. Your free time is important too! Make to create time for daily activities that fulfill you :)

Plan your delay! Set a day in your planner where you just catch up on everything you’re late on so you don’t get super stressed if your study day didn’t go as planned ! I always use my Sundays as « delay days » haha

If you have enough time, try to plan review sessions of the topics you’ve already seen. When I was studying anatomy I would make review sessions one day a week so I could memorize in the best way possible.

Also, plan a day or half a day to test yourself. Do it early enough to re-adjust your study plan if you feel like you have to spend more time reviewing a certain topic!

And you, what are your “planning habits”? Do you use a planner ?

Please reblog and like this post if you want more tips like this one!

Study snack ideas in the comments please!

Had my last lecture of 2018! Now I have 10 days to retain all the information I need for my exam and then I’ll be DONE!

Do you have exams soon?

Ps : how cute is Micky in this pic? 😍🐱