Healing from undefined relationship
Can everyone agree that it’s the “almost relationships” that break you more than anything else? It’s the stories that are abandoned mid-sentence that are the toughest to let go of. There is a way out of this purgatory, though, and it involves a conscious effort to release the “what-ifs” and move forward with purpose.
But remember, there is no right timeline for healing. You can take as long as you need to get over someone. Sometimes it takes a long time, maybe longer than makes logical sense to you. Sometimes it feels traumatic too, and it’s okay. Putting your heart on the line and developing feelings is never a shameful act.
Let your heart cry out loud.
Sometimes a reason that you have a hard time getting over someone that you never really dated is because you don’t give yourself permission to grieve them. So let yourself be upset. Grieve the loss of this person as a romantic prospect, whether you knew them for few months or years, and eventually the emotions will lose their charge and you’ll be one step closer to emotional freedom over this person.
Stop checking in on them.
No more buts, and false hope. Checking in on them and making assumptions about what their life is like now is slowing down your moving-on process. Stop all the ways for them to contact you or check in on your life at their convenience is keeping you from being able to fully heal and move on. It’s like tearing the scab off a wound over and over. Though I don’t want to be hipocrite, but I still follow him on instagram. So, It’s okay not to block or unfollow the person, but do yourself the favor of taking this person out of your sight for a while so that you can heal. Don’t search for his name. It was tempting at first, but you really have to help yourself. It doesn’t have to be this way forever, only until you can get to a point where you truly feel like you’ve moved on.
He’s not the only man in the world.
They are not the last person on Earth that you can have a romantic conversation with, or who inspires you. You can and will find these qualities in someone else, and naming them helps you get better at finding them in people in the future. It helps to get this all out on paper, so you don’t trick yourself looking back on “what-could-have-been” with rose-colored lenses. Reminding yourself of reality is a sobering but very effective way to move on.
Getting over anyone, even an almost relationship is tough. But trust that you’ll come out the other side. Trust that you will love again, in a right time.
