#ahahahahaha.

He shoved his commlink back in his pocket and picked his own sword back up. Something on his face must have changed, because his shadow raised an eyebrow.

“Everything all right, Joe?”

“Yeah,” Joe said, then realized it was an obvious lie and decided to cover it up with his tactic of choice. “Just wondering about something.”

“Which is?” Killjoy raised his sword, and Joe parried it. His shadow was taking it easy on him for some reason today, and he wasn’t sure why.

Tactic activated: ask dumb questions. “So, when you die, where do you go? Do you notice time passing? Are you in purgatory, or just in stasis? Is there a Shadow Hermitcraft where all the shadows live? Do you have little shadow screens to watch us go about our lives, or are you just clueless until we summon you?”

Killjoy blinked in surprise, which gave Joe a decent opening for a swift jab towards his shadow’s side. He reeled back a little, eyes widening in surprise - was he not expecting Joe to occasionally use underhanded tactics? - before his face cleared, and he smiled. Not really a warm smile, but somewhere between pride and exasperation, which was close enough.

“I’m not answering all of those at once for you,” he responded, flourishing his blade. Joe took the opening and swung upwards, knocking him off-balance. “But since I seem to be a bit sloppy today, you’ll get a few answers.”

“Okay,” Joe said, “so can you see me when you’re not, uh… in existence?”

Killjoy shifted his stance, and he brought his sword up instinctively to parry the jab that followed just a moment later. “Not usually. Unless you’re in here, or another shadow shrine. And I can’t really hear you, or know exactly how much time has passed.” His shadow grinned. “That’s all the answer you get for the time being.”

“Do I have to beat you and resummon you before I get more answers?”

“Yes.”

“I can manage that.” Joe swung his sword upwards, a wide arc, and used that distraction to kick Killjoy directly in one kneecap. His shadow didn’t buckle or anything like he’d hoped, but he was momentarily thrown off-balance, and Joe took that moment to stab the stumbling Killjoy right through the chest.

Killjoy winced, and then vanished in a puff of triangles. A small ping on Joe’s commlink notified him that he’d successfully defeated his own shadow.

He sighed, mouthed be back in a bit in the general direction of wherever the poofed Killjoy might potentially be watching from, and headed out of the cave.

<JoeHillsSays> I have a little time, where should we meet?

The response was immediate.

<Grian> hippie camp

That was a little bit of a hike… oh well. Joe sighed, stretched his legs, and headed into the Nether. Through the Nether hub, into the Hermitland portal, hike through Area 77, and then eventually he was at the place where there was, well… a giant RV hovering in the air, and a very noisy barn. And also a very tired, somewhat gaunt-looking Grian.

“You look awful.”

Grian laughed, a wheeze that sounded dangerously close to the beginning of a coughing fit. “Hooh, I know. I feel awful.”

Joe dug around in his pockets and pulled out a whole pumpkin pie, miraculously not smushed thanks to the miracle that was hammerspace. “You hungry at all? It’s technically still seasonal, at least for the U.S. of A.”

Grian smiled weakly. “No thanks, I’m not… not really hungry. You should sit down.” He gestured towards a small campfire with a couple of logs set around it. “I don’t think you’re gonna like this.”

“You said it had to do with Killjoy, right?” Joe sighed, sitting down on one of the logs. “I heard about what… what he did to your shadow. Already told him it wasn’t right.”

Grian took a seat nearish Joe, sitting against the log with his knees up to his chest. “I don’t - I mean, yeah, he was a jerk to my shadow, but Jigsaw’s a way bigger jerk. That’s not my problem.”

He took a deep breath, stared at the fire. “Joe… there’s really no way to not drop a bombshell with what I’m about to say. Your shadow, Killjoy, he can…”

Grian gulped. “...can possess people…” His voice was faint and distant, almost a whisper. Like he was afraid of being overheard.

Joe, for his part, was doing a bad job of remaining composed as well; his heart was hammering in his chest as he stared at Grian wordlessly.

“Sorry,” Grian said, shifting uncomfortably, “I know it’s a lot to take in…”

He found the words, somehow, a rough expression of the sinking feeling in his gut put to speech. “How do you know about that, Grian?”

Grian took a few moments to process Joe’s response, still staring at the fire, its light glinting off his eyes as his expression hardened. “You knew? And you didn’t tell anyone? You just keep summoning him and summoning him and making him more powerful? What are you doing?”

Joe took a deep breath. “Killjoy can only do that to me, Grian. And he’s promised he’ll only use that ability on me if we’re in a shadow shrine.”

Grian’s wheezing laugh was bitter. “And he doesn’t break his promises, does he?” He looked up towards Joe, light from the fire making the dark circles under his eyes all the more prominent. “He told me that. While he was controlling me.”

It felt like the ground had been pulled out from underneath Joe. Like he’d just been shoved into the fire he was staring at. He struggled to find his voice. “I… didn’t know he could do that.”

“Well, he can,” Grian snapped. 

A long, awkward pause. “I’m sorry,” Joe finally managed.

Grian shook his head, brief moment of anger gone for the time being. “It’s… he lied to you, or maybe developed that ability later on. I don’t know. I didn’t realize you were aware of it.” He let out a long, soft breath. “I’m not sure where to go with this conversation anymore.”

“Me neither,” Joe responded. “Is… everything okay, Grian? Knowing what he said he did to Jigsaw… if he was controlling you while doing it, I can’t imagine that was pleasant.”

Grian shuddered. “It… hurt. It felt like I was wearing a bunch of clothing that was all five sizes too small for me. Except the clothes were also controlling me.”

Joe frowned thoughtfully. “I’ve… never felt any sensation like that when Killjoy, well… he calls it ‘shadowing’ people. Whatever happened to you in regards to that, I can’t say I know what that was.”

“Maybe…” Grian muttered thoughtfully, “maybe it’s because he didn’t fit right? My shadow vanished when he, uh, shadowed me, so… maybe it’s because he’s you-shaped, not me-shaped.”

“That could be it…”

Grian sighed. “Even if it didn’t hurt, it was… unsettling, not being in control of my own body. Even though I probably could have shoved him away at any time, I just went with it. I’m not sure why.” He looked down at his hands. “And it almost feels like I can still hear him laughing.”

Joe stiffened instinctively as Grian’s words brought that echo back to him as well, the phantom sound of soft, low laughter suddenly ringing in his ears.

“I think,” Joe mumbled, “I’m gonna have to talk to Killjoy about this.”

Grian took a deep breath, put one hand on Joe’s shoulder. “Yeah. Just… be careful, okay?”

Joe stood up. “Okay.”

He left the campsite as casually as he could, then broke into a sprint the second he was sure he was out of Grian’s field of view and kept running out, farther and farther. Towards - he’d like to say he wasn’t sure what, but he had a pretty good feeling, actually. There was a shadow temple somewhere out here nobody ever bothered to go to, way out of everyone’s range. Even the Vex-Shadows didn’t end up here too frequently.

And that was good, because he needed to have a talk with his shadow.

He made it there quicker than expected, following the hasty and slapdash trail of torches that the cave’s original explorer had left behind, sliding down a couple cave formations and nearly tripping into a ravine before finally making it into the well-lit room.

Joe closed the door someone had put there behind him, and hesitantly strode up to the center of the room, heart still pounding. He was here, locked in a room where nobody but his shadow could find him.

“Killjoy. We need to talk.”

He watched as his shadow boiled over, as his doppelganger took form and squinted at their new surroundings.

“This is a different shrine.”

Joe shrugged. “Biffa was using the other one.”

Killjoy stared at him, eyes narrowed in confusion. “Joe… you’re lying. I was watching the old summoning platform the whole time, and nobody came in. Why…”

“Apparently,” he responded, clenching his jaw, “I’m not the only person in this room who’s been lying.” Joe drew his sword, tapping the enchanted iron against the ground impatiently. “You told me you couldn’t shadow anyone besides me. But here I am, getting pulled off to one side by Grian of all people, scared witless because a certain look-alike of mine apparently borrowed his body.”

“He asked me to help him kill Jigsaw,” his shadow responded cooly, still examining the new environment, completely nonplussed by Joe’s anger. “And I did.”

“You hurt him.”

“Hurt both of us, actually. I wasn’t taking it easy in training today for your ego’s sake, Joe. It still stings whenever I move.” Killjoy sighed. “What do you want out of me right now?”

“Promise,” Joe said shakily, pointing the sword directly at his doppelganger, “promise that you will never do that to anyone besides me, ever.”

His shadow laughed quietly, that same low chuckle that froze Joe to the spot every time, and folded his hands behind his back. “I can’t make that promise, Joe.”

“You will.” He took a deep breath, stepped forward and entered a fighting stance without even thinking about it. “Or I’m going to kill you right now, and I won’t summon you ever again.”

Killjoy stiffened, and for a second he had hope he was getting through to his doppelganger, that they were going to work all this out-

And then the laughter started. Soft, dark laughter that washed over the room in waves, made the lights flicker and the shadows dance as his own shadow slowly advanced towards him and he found himself unable to move, unable to even speak or lift his sword to defend himself.

“Oh, Joe. I’m afraid it’s far too late for you to make that decision. You can’t back out now. Not unless you want things to go back to how they used to be.”

One shadowy hand grabbed Joe by the collar roughly, pulled him eye-to-eye with a grinning Killjoy. “Didn’t I already teach you that you can’t run from your own shadow, Joe? Or did you think that was an empty promise?”

Joe said nothing - not like he was able to, anyway - and mustered up what little resolve he had left to glare at Killjoy with all the force he had. Every single shred of resentment, every ache from training, all of it channeled into one look.

His shadow flinched, dropping him immediately, with a flick of the wrist almost like he’d been touching something dirty. “...Fine. You’re not going to budge on this. I’ll make you a counter-offer. I won’t shadow anyone without their express permission. That’s my promise.”

Joe let out a breath he didn’t know he’d been holding, exhaled and inhaled again. “Deal.”

He glanced towards the watch attachment on his commlink - midnight, almost exactly - then back towards Killjoy. He needed to sleep. And… while it felt like a really bad idea, he needed protection from random mobs, he did have a bed on him, and Killjoy had never been the type of person to wantonly murder any kind of unconcious person.

Killjoy raised an eyebrow at him. “Go ahead. I’ll keep watch.”

He set down his bed, moved it as far to one side as possible as Killjoy took up a position at the opposite end of the room at the door, standing there silently. Fell back onto the covers, completely drained.

His commlink buzzed, and he wearily fished it out, assuming it was probably one last message from Grian. That, however, was… not the case. This was a console message, a personal alert.