#aethelar

(2) Graves has, over the years, attempted to grow untold numbers of house plants. The reason the numbers are untold is because the buggers keep dying on him, and he has no idea why. It's got to the stage where he's given up and he refuses to have any plants anywhere near him in case he kills them, but then someone gives him a succulent for Christmas and he just kind of puts it on the edge of his desk and ignores it. Three years later, it's still going strong, and this year it even flowers.

(3) Image is everything. Because of this, Graves drinks bitter black coffee, strong enough to dissolve spoons and make all the junior aurors fear him. What they don't know is that he has an industrial sized bottle of hazelnut latte syrup hidden under his desk, and the coffee he ends up drinking is actually more sugar than caffeine.

(4) Graves does not fly. He can fly, if he absolutely has to, but he has yet to find a circumstance where he absolutely has to, so he does not. If ever did (which he won't) then you'd see that his flying method involves wrapping both arms and legs round the broom, positioning it vertically so he can still see where he's going while being laid flat along it, and wobbling very slowly forward. He looks like a terrified koala on an ent.

(5) Graves' favourite animals are pigeons. Not the pretty ones people keep as pets, the grey ones, often mangy, stealing scraps from hot dog stands. This might seem odd, given how many fantastical creatures the magical and non magical world boast, but Graves appreciates the lack of fucks they give and the way they're impossible to ever get rid of. Also their commitment to a striking monotone colour scheme. Gotta admire that.

(6) Not many people know this, but Graves has a really nice singing voice. It's kind of soft and husky, the sort that hums songs he half remembers and breaks into one or two lines of song when he gets to the chorus. He sings when he cooks, because his mother used to, and every now and then if the office is quiet he sings to the succulent on the edge of his desk, just in case it gets lonely when he has to go home for the night.

(7) Speaking of cooking, Graves is an excellent chef. There's a lot of Italian influence, of course, but also random things he's picked up around the place. His comfort food is carbonara, proper carbonara with egg and panchetta and no cream but plenty of pepper. When he's stressed he makes spanakopita, because filo can't be rushed and the repetitive folding makes his thoughts go quiet. On really bad days he ends up with more than he can eat and drops anonymous trayfuls off in the office kitchen.

(8) You would think, looking at him, that Graves would tan in summer. In a gentle, cloudy summer, you would be right. In most summers however he ends up with a glowing scarlet stripe that starts on the tops of his ears, continues over his ridiculously high cheekbones, and scoots over the bridge of his nose. Seriously, the man can /drown/ himself in sunblock, but whatever he does he can never stop his ears burning.

(9) Graves accidentally trained a cat to make sure he left the office on time. She's a stray (he's pretty sure) and he got in the habit of saying hello to her on his way home. Then she had kittens and ended up alarmingly thin from looking after them, so Graves started bringing her scraps, then treats, then square meals every time he passed her corner of the street. She doesn't have kittens now, but if Graves works too late she appears on his windowsill and mrows demandingly until he goes home.

(10) The reason Graves didn't appear in Crimes of Grindelwald is because he was so damn miffed that no one noticed he was replaced that he quit his job in spectacular, pyrotechnic fashion in the middle of an ICW meeting, and is now permanently ensconced in the Caribbean and refusing to take anyone's calls. He has a pink cocktail, sunburnt ears, the most outrageous flamingo sunglasses, and he even took the cat with him. He's reading Beatrix Potter to her on the beach. 

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MIMI. MIMI. 

I love this so much???

The cage stifles his wings, and the chains made of steel leaves red marks on his grey skin. Percival, as he’s known in the recent century, can hardly believe that a demon as old as he is has been brought down by mere townsfolk armed with pitchforks and puny torches. He has to give credit to these humans however, they’ve clearly learned a thing or two since the last attempt to capture a demon. They’ve given up on scaring him off with crosses, for one, and have stopped splashing him with supposed holy water. The steel works against him, and someone manages to find one of his true names, thus rendering him powerless. 

Now, Percival isn’t a violent demon by any means; he’s survived all these centuries by minding his own business and making deals with the bold, but those are far and few in between. Which is precisely why nothing in hell and heaven will stop him from getting revenge on the pathetic humans who so cowardly blindsided him in his nap (demons aren’t exempt from naps too, you know). 

There is this one human who intrigues the demon. He comes in the night when the villagers cower in their homes for fear of monsters and ghosts and ghouls. The first time the man with the flaming hair visits Percival, he says nothing, merely stares at the demon with eyes too wide and too trusting, and Percival wonders how easily his delicate throat will crush beneath burning claws. The man leaves, and returns the next day, and the next, and the next. One day, demon and man have their first conversation, and Percival learns that this creature goes by the name of Newt, and is shunned by the villagers for being different. Percival wonders why he doesn’t attack the strange young man, and reasons that the chains that bind him keep him from doing so. And yet, when Newt presses his lithe frame close to the cage, close enough that Percival can extend his claw and just neatly slice through his jugular, the demon refrains from doing so. 

It’s nearly a full moon when Newt gets word that the villagers are going to kill Percival, something about how sacrificing a demon on a full moon would grant them immense power and eternal youth. Poppycock. The night hardly stirs as Newt slips off to the cage with a key in hand, and Percival is amused as he watches the little human fumble with the lock, and hisses as Newt pries the steel off from his skin. The burns heal in seconds, and Newt hardly has time to marvel before Percival is out of the cage with his leathery wings unfurled. Newt can see the intense anger and hate in the demon’s dark eyes, and knows that there’s no stopping Percival from wreaking havoc on the village. He wonders if feeling no remorse makes him a bad person, as he watches the villagers scream for mercy even as Percival devours their souls, although he does appreciate that the children, women and animals are spared. Belly full and anger sated, Percival turns on his little human and grasps Newt’s frail hand in his own clawed ones. There’s a stirring in the forests as they take flight, and all they leave behind is fire and destruction, and a warning the surviving villagers won’t ever forget.

@aethelar hat auf deinen Eintrag geantwortet “Me, as soon as we hear news about Percival Graves:”

YOU HAVE NEWS???

Thank you, lovely new friend!  The stalking has been mutual.  IDK if that makes it better or worse.

… Probably I should not be allowed to talk to people.  Ah, well.

You should absolutely give saying Fishbiscuits a try!  It is very satisfying, when you are not allowed to yell other profanity.  There is something satisfying about the word biscuit as substitute profanity.

I got inspired by @missisjoker ’s Star Wars and Jurassic Park Crossover or whatever (I don’t know now to call them..sorry)

I’m not very good at writing in english (nor in german) but maybe I’ll add some paragraphs later.

Percival Graves / Aaron Hotchner

So I just had the idea that Graves would fit perfectly as Aaron Hotchner. Imagine analytical Graves analyzing the dark wizards so he could catch them even better than he already does. His knowledge about psychology would also benefit his behaviour towards the aurors. He wouldn’t just be the director who’d do everything for them and calls them idiots, but he would perfect this game to infinity.

Newt Scamander / Dr. Spencer Reid

Like I dunno, Newt’s called as the first ever male Slayer (and everyone’s like WTF this idiot’s going to get himself killed did you see the way he was with that minor demon he’s calling it Pickett and lets it ride on his shoulder). And Theseus, who’s a Watcher, petitions to be Newt’s Watcher but gets turned down because the Council are assholes who don’t want any attachment between Watcher and Slayer because they only see the Slayer as a tool to be used for the greater good (I fucking hate those guys; this is literally canon in Buffy) and to ensure that they decide to assign one Percival Graves as his Watcher because “it’s Graves, there’s no way he’ll get attached - does the man even have feelings?”. And Tina’s a Watcher in training who’s mentor is Graves so where he goes, she goes. Also, pretend there’s a Watcher’s Council branch in America...I can’t remember if there is in the show. 

Newt’s not for the whole “slay first, ask questions later” thing ESPECIALLY where minor demons are concerned - they’re not causing harm, why the fuck would I kill them? What is wrong with you people? And so he still has his suitcase (that was expanded by a witch Theseus knew because he knew his younger brother would bring home minor, less-harmful demons...at least, he hoped) but while there’s still magical creatures, they’re seen more as “lesser demons” (Bowtruckles, Occamies, Nifflers, etc).

Anyway, Graves arrives and his eye is probably going to be permanently twitching because holy shit this goes against everything he was taught as a Watcher why is this my life, what did I ever do to you people to get stuck with an idiot.

 So Graves tries (and fails) to change Newt’s view on things and damn it, why does he not mind the fact Newt’s glowing with happiness at having rescued a nest of baby Occamies from being eaten by another demon and is cooing softly at them. Why is he becoming fond of the other man? He’s not supposed to get attached - especially since he’s sure Newt’s going to be the shortest Slayer ever in the history of all Slayers. 

But damn it, he realizes to his horror he’s falling in love with Newt and finds himself going along with him on patrols instead of just staying put and waiting for updates. Like he was taught. Because the thought of Newt getting killed without him there to possibly stop it is unbearable.

And when the Watcher’s Council finds out all hell breaks loose.

So Graves, Newt, and Tina are on the run from the Watcher’s Council (because like hell Graves is going to let them assign some asshole to be Newt’s new Watcher who will probably take extreme measures to “correct” his way of thinking) and end up hiding with Tina’s sister, Queenie, who’s a witch. 

Somewhere along the way Gramander happens, and possibly Goldgramander as well.

Maybe Credence is a half-demon the trio adopts (which puts them under suspicion of the Council)? Which then leads to the Council finding out about Newt and Graves (and Tina, possibly) relationship. Cue the group hiding with Queenie and her powerful coven, idk. 

This is fun - I’ll have to expand this later. 

sksdjhd you caught me mimi!! 😂 the Witcher series does not in fact have a character named Percival (at least not to my knowledge?); however i’m a very predictable person who is still - still ! it’s been four years! -- in love with Percival Graves and so I like to, sometimes, sprinkle in a little character named Percival in my stories for other fandoms, and this Percival character may or may not be physically described as looking weirdly similar to Colin Farrell. 

(he’s pretty) 

So in this story The Wolf and the Bard, Percival (who is not  Percival Graves, cos this Percival is a meanie, and our Graves is a kind man) in this story I said Percival is a hunter who’s very interested in the rumors that Jaskier goes around accompanied by a huge white wolf, cos, yk, there’s money to be made here if he can catch and kill the beast. 

FABULOUS POTENTIAL