#adhd impulsivity

I desperately want to make a custom minifigure of Patty, but I desperately need to stop spending money on a whim

Having anxiety and phobias but also having the risk-taking symptoms of ADHD is so insane because I'm like oh I can't lightly touch that rusty metal with the tip of my finger because what if I get tetanus and suffocate but I will climb up that slippery crumbling cliff which overhangs a raging river. Climbing with ropes is scarier than climbing without ropes because what if the rope gets wrapped around my neck somehow (and I suffocate). On a plane imagining it's about to crash to create a thrill fun enough to distract myself from the fact that oh no oh no the air is too dry (what if I suffocate). Wearing dress uniform takes more courage than the Confidence Course that's supposed to help you face your fears, because the tie tab is choking me and I'm gonna suffocate (the Confidence Course is whatever, you might fall and break a limb but that's not scary, wdym?) Like inside you are two wolves but they actually agree with each other, because it's not about actual safety or fear of death it's about fear of this one Thing, specifically.

complete silence is more distracting than background noise and you can fight me on this

ahh don't you just love it when you wake up peacefully in your bed, comfy and content, and you stretch out while working through a general plan for the day in your head, pondering which of your many ongoing projects you'll try to put some time into, and then your adhd grabs you by the fucking throat and whispers feverishly into your ear, "we need to learn how to do this other thing that we have no materials for and we need to do it fucking NOW. don't even THINK about that other shit, it's all garbage, THIS is what we have to do or else life is meaningless and we will NEVER. EVER. FEEL. JOY. AGAIN."

Quarantine better end before my liver does