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I hate how I feel when I’m pregnant. If I don’t eat first thing in the morning, I get nauseous and I feel like shit all day. But even if I do eat, I still just feel disgusting. It’s like this in between feeling of not normal and not nauseous. I have no energy and my house is a disaster because I can’t even get off the couch. I’m hoping these symptoms subside soon, but not holding my breath for it to happen either.
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6w5d (estimated)
(eta: 7w4d actually)
I don’t remember being this tired last time. All I want to do is sleep, then all I want to do it lay on the couch and not move cause I feel so sick. I’m such a shit mom right now. My husband is a saint, as always. He’s at work by 7 each day so he can get off at 3:30, then he comes home and takes on the brunt of carrying for Kennedy so I can rest. We are living with my sister, but she recently had a really bad break on her arm the required surgery (and might need another) so she’s out of commission for help.
I find it really difficult to actually picture this pregnancy making it all the way to bringing home a baby. That’s so sad to say and think about but I can’t fathom it right now. It was the same for Kennedy, but at least I was more excited with her. My mom was like “do you think you’ll ever feel excited for this baby” and like, fuck off mom. It’s hard to explain that, in my mind this isn’t how having a baby works. For me, there is endless amounts of heartache that is supposed to happen before you have a baby. That’s the only experience I have with it, so for it to just happen... it’s weird. I feel like I haven’t paid my dues for such joy.
I do find myself talking about the future and including this baby. I’ll say things like “Oh that room would be a good play room for the girls” (while looking at houses. Idk why sometimes my brain defaults to them being a girl) or “I like this backyard for the kids”. So, it’s there. And I do feel bursts of excitement every now and then, it’s not all doom and gloom and I don’t feel any regret.
I just can’t wait to feel better again. Early pregnancy sucks, I forgot how much it sucks. In a month or so and I’ll feel better and then I’ll forget how much this sucks.
Well I told my coworkers yesterday and now I guess it's time I tell Tumblr....
I'm pregnant! I'm 6 weeks and 5 days. I was going to hold off until 12 weeks but I honestly don't know how people wait that long. I'm sooo scared and nervous but so far we had a 6 week ultrasound and Baby C has a heartbeat! I have another ultrasound at 10 weeks and I'm on lots of folic acid this time. Oh and I have an estimated delivery date of February 2, 2019 😊
It looks like my baby is doing well! Measuring 6w5d They said that the car accident didn’t affect the baby in no way possible and that everything is look good. However they did mention that it looks like I’m having some bleeding they asked me if I had any spotting or intense cramping. I told them that I have not. They just said to stay alert just in case if I do have bleeding to come to the office right away. They said the baby’s heart beat is now 127. Did any of y’all had that happen before? I’m not really worrying about the bleeding but it would be nice to know if any of y’all had something similar happen.
6w5d
I took some b6 and Unisom last night and I have to say, I’m not nauseous this morning.
I am, however, dead tired. I don’t know if it’s the unisom or the baby.
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6 weeks 5 days
So I think I am beginning to "feel" pregnant. If "feeling" pregnant means feeling like crap all the time, then I definitely feel pregnant! I threw up for the first time today, yay! But pretty much it's just been constant nausea and fatigue. Yesterday I barely ate anything and ignored my body's late night cries for food and I paid the price today. I woke up with a terrible headache, feeling dizzy, and shaking and then I cried because I was so stupid. I can't continue my poor habits of just not eating. I don't think I'm hungry more often, but when I'm hungry it's like "Food now or die". So I called Bill mid day and cried on the phone and he talked me down. He is amazing and every day I fall more in love with him. He had been so attentive and I can't wait to see what an amazing father he is going to be. Still can't come up with a nickname yet. Nothing feels right, and maybe that's because I don't feel super connected. Like, I just waiting for something to go wrong so I'm distancing myself out of fear. I thought to myself the other day, "what if something didn't go wrong!" and that was weird. Over the years I told myself to expect the worst with TTC and that I would never get pregnant like other women, and then I did. So maybe, just maybe like other women I can have a healthy pregnancy with no complications?
