I don't know what to do. Should I give you my letter? Would that ruin the possibility of a friendship? Would I regret it? Because I don't know if you still like someone else. I can't compete with someone that I can't beat.
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I really don't know what to do with these feelings. I don't know if I should tell you, because I feel like it would ruin my chances to be even your friend. But if I don't tell this to anyone I think I might explode.
Someone unexpected coming when you had no high expectation of her/him to begin with.
"So... you're gonna meet your future husband tomorrow?"
"Hey, it's not like that. You all know that playing match-maker for her only daughter is my mother's current hobby. I'll just meet him and his family tomorrow, like usual."
"To think about it, so it's your seventh times for your mother setting you up with a man. Oh man, your mother was so persistent. I'll give my salute for her next time I meet her."
"How is he? Have you seen him?"
"Nope. Mom said it would be surprise for the two of us tomorrow," I shrugged, mindlessly stirred my ice tea with its black straw. "I was only told that this guy is almost thirty this year, that he already got his Master degree abroad two years ago, and currently he works in some multinational company. His parents--his father, exactly--is my father's friend when they're in the college back then. They'd ended up meeting each other on their faculty reunion last week and found out that they both have still-unmarried daughter and son."
The perks of having parents who want her only daughter to get married early, I bitterly added in my head. I'm still twenty-five though.
"Geez, your future husband sounded so old and boring," Wendy, one of my best friends since senior high school mocked in a second and gulped her iced Americano. She's always like that, voicing out her opinion bluntly without considering others' feeling. Sometimes I got intimidated by her presence and attitude, even though overall she's a good girl. She's my best friend after all, for years. She's just... too honest with her thoughts. "Are you sure about this one?"
"Hey, you can't judge people whom you haven't seen, Wendy," Tasya, my another best friend told Wendy and Wendy just made face--her fixed reply whenever she heard Tasya tried to advise her. Different to Wendy the though hooligan, Tasya was a lot more gentle and considerate. Tasya always played the role as Wendy's brake or the one who did control damage for every hurricane that Wendy had caused. "How could you say that he's old and boring?"
Wendy gave Tasya her infamous are-you-kidding-me-look. "Oi, didn't you hear? He's freaking thirty this year. Besides that, he doesn't get married yet because he's so busy studying for his Master degree and busy working at that damned multinational company. Can you take different conclusion that I did? If you can, tell us. Right now."
I gulped to hear Wendy's agressive rants to Tasya who now stayed silent--whether she just chose to let Wendy win to make things easier or she's thinking the about the best counterattack to shut Wendy up. If Wendy's attitude sometimes got me intimidated, so Tasya's way of thinking sometimes got me surprised; she's so unpredictable, everyone couldn't guess what she would do next. These two best friends of mine were indeed full of wonder.
"You always have your way to make Vania down before meeting a man that her parents picked for her," that's Tasya reply for Wendy. "Can't you be a little bit more considerate or supportive for her? It's for her future, you know. Her parents, know that Vania is too shy and reserved to find a man by herself. We know that too. So, when her parents found a man that they found suitable for her, at least... can you show some supports for her?"
There, Tasya just stated the most important truth of me: I'd be twenty-five years old this year and I still couldn't manage to find a boyfriend for myself. Unlike Tasya who already had a fiancé (which her boyfriend that she'd dated for five years) that she would like to marry probably next year and Wendy who had not only many flings before but also someone she's close to at the moment, I just stayed single in my entire 25 years old life.
I was always awkward. I wasn't that attractive, unlike my two best friends who had their own interesting charms. I didn't talk much. I didn't socialize much. I'd been spent my life studying, studying, and studying. Even after getting my Bachelor degree, I continued to take Master degree (which I was still working on) because I just loved studying. When my friends were busy working, getting married, and having kids already, I was still single and still... studying.
That's why my parents so worked up to find me a man that wanted to marry me since last year.
"I don't mean to let her down, Tasya," Wendy reasoned and slung her lean arm around me. "We all know what kind of men that her parents had brought to her. They're so typical: much older than Vania and boring. Sometimes there were some pricks that full of themselves. And from what I heard from Vania earlier, how could I not conclude the same olds?" she sighed and drew me closer to her, as if she didn't want to let me go forever. "I love this cinnamon roll so much, Tasya. I just can't hand her to some random old and boring man."
See? Behind that rocky attitude, Wendy was a good girl who loved me so much.
Before Tasya could say something, I felt the table was vibrated--one of our phone got a message. And it was mine. After unlocking its screen, I found a two new messages from unknown number and my mother.
From: +62812XXXXXXX
Vania, it's me Reza. I heard from your
mother that you're going out with your
friends at Ground coffee shop. Would you
mind if I pick you up? I have to make sure
about some things before our official
meeting tomorrow.
From: Mom
Vania, I'm with Reza's mother right now.
We're talking about tomorrow and I'm so
excited!
"So... his name is Reza? And to be honest, he sounds a lot older than your mother, based on the text that I just saw," Wendy commented after peering the texts I just received. "I can imagine that he's a bald man with thick glasses on the tip of his nose. Ugh, I can't, Vania. I CAN'T."
I looked at Tasya and showed her his message. Her expression was no better than Wendy--she probably forgot to filter her expression at the moment. "O... kay. You better reply his text and say that you're waiting for him here. Bald or not, we'll see soon. It's good that we can scan him first."
But still, I found it strange. I remembered that it should be a surprise for both of us. And knowing that my mother was hanging out with his mother right now, it wouldn't be a surprise that they're talking about us and ended up leaking my current position to his mother and his mother told her son. How else he would know? And why he wanted to meet me first before the meeting? Did he find something bad about me so he needed to 'make sure about things'? Did he want to end this thing by himself before it's started?
I didn't know why I was so sure about the last option.
"I know you must be thinking about some negative things," Tasya smiled, trying to ease the atmosphere that suddenly became so heavy. "Don't worry, he's not only going to meet you today, but also us. We got your back. Don't worry."
Her words made me felt much better. She's right. Why should I think about all the negative things that might (or might not) happen? I shouldn't be afraid. I had my two best friends here staying by my side. I should have nothing to fear.
I saved his number and sent him a reply.
For: Reza
It's okay. I'm waiting.
After that, as my useless fear disappeared just like that, the three of us continued our talks. Tasya told us about her fiance who just got promoted at his work and now his salary was doubled. Both Wendy and I went 'WHOAAAAAA!' because heck, Tasya's fiance was working at one of the famous IT companies in the country and we all knew that the employees' payment there were beyond fantastic. Geez, if Tasya really married him later, she would have no worry about financial issues. So lucky of her.
And then my phone rang, there was incoming call from Reza. Wendy and Tasya gave me a supportive nod, and I swiped the green phone on my smartphone.
"H-hello?"
"Hello? Vania? It's me, Reza," my eyes widened when I heard his voice, never expected that he would sound like this. I thought his voice would be rough and deep, but surprisingly his voice was so light, soft, and gentle. Hearing her voice, strangely made me think that Christmas was coming closer. "I've just arrived here."
I gulped, felt so nervous. Hearing his voice made me tingle and giddy, making it hard to imagine that a bald man who wore thick glasses would sound like this. "Oh, you're here already?" I asked, and then I heard a door was being opened and the bell jingled from the other line. "Where are you, by the way?"
"I just went inside. Where are you sitting, by the way?" he said, and then I heard him talking to a woman who asked where he would like to sit--the waitress. "Ah, thank you. I'm looking for someone."
I craned my neck to see the cashier near the main door where the waiters and waitresses were waiting for customers, couldn't hide my curiosity anymore. There, I saw a man wore gray sweater with white collar appeared from its neck, black pants, and a pair of black-white sneakers standing in front of the cashier with his hand holding a phone next to his ear. I couldn't see his face because his back was facing me.
Is it him? I questioned myself. If it was him, thank God, he wasn't bald--his hair was fine and black. Though, I couldn't see whether he wore that pair of glasses or not.
"I'm at table fifteen in the back," I told him, and my voice got so shaky due to the unbearable nervousness. "There are two girls in my table, includes me."
I saw (that suspected as) Reza turned back and I cursed inwardly because he was blocked by some tall waiter who stopped in front of him. Why the timing was this bad?! I couldn't but to inwardly yell in annoyance. I tried to shift my position, still wished that I could see him, but that darn waiter was so big and (suspected) Reza was still completely blocked.
"Okay, I'll be there," he told me. As the waiter moved and I could see his face--
"Hey, what are you trying to see?" now Tasya who sat in front of me blocked the man who was walking towards our table.
"Yeah, you've been moving a lot like some heated worm," Wendy commented too and shot me with her antagonistic side-eye. "Is there any interesting view there? I assume that--oh my Godness!"
And yes, it's oh my Godness.
In front of our table, there was a man wearing the same attire to the man I'd seen earlier next to cashier earlier. The different was, now I saw his front view. He didn't have that impressive height--it's average for a man and still taller than I was, but his appearance justified it so perfectly. Handsome wasn't enough to describe him. He was too handsome that I thought that God sculptured his face by His own hands. He didn't bald. He didn't wear thick glasses. He didn't look like he's thirty--heck, I would trust it immediately if there was someone saying that he's still in college taking his Bachelor degree.
He's just too handsome to be true. Even Wendy's jaw was still hanging stupidly.
Seeing our dumbfounded expression, Tasya decided to turn back and she gasped, "Oh my Goodness!" too.
"R-R-Reza?" I whispered to the phone that I was still holding next to my ear.
He smiled. He smiled and he just looked like an angel that just fell onto the hard and dirty ground. "So.... are you Vania?" he asked through his phone although we're already face to face like this, chuckled lightly to see my expression. I nodded, stupidly. "Oh well, nice to meet you."
I was still too awestruck to even mutter a word.
"OH, GOD!!!!!! JUST GET MARRIED THE TWO OF YOU!" Wendy blew up and smacked the table with her fists, making the other customers turned their heads towards our table and giggled to watch her sudden antics. "I'LL GIVE YOU MY BLESSING! MY INFINITE BLESSING!!!" she shook my body and said through gritted teeth, "I swear and I'm sure he's the one. I can tell that he-is-the-ONE!"
"Er... I'm sorry, we're sorry," Tasya said to Reza, smiling awkwardly while pulling Wendy from her seat so it was empty next to me. "Please, have a seat. We'll be going in five minutes, anyway."
"WHAT FIVE MINUTES?!" Wendy roared, still standing with her hand was being gasped by Tasya who was still smiling to Reza who now sat next to me. "We should go right now. Let the love birds take care of themselves!"
"We haven't introduced ourselves to him, you idiot. Be polite, he's older than us." Tasya muttered and pulled Wendy to sit down next to her. Tasya stretched her arm towards Reza and introduced herself to him. "Hi, I'm Tasya, Vania's best friend."
Beaming, Reza shook her hand and said, "I'm Reza and nice to meet you, Tasya."
"I'm Wendy," now it was Wendy who introduced herself. And I was pleased that she already calmed herself down and didn't look intimidating like she always was. "Nice to meet you."
"Hi, Wendy. Nice to meet you too," with the same amount friendliness, Reza greeted Wendy and shook her hand.
"I believe that now it's time for us to leave," Tasya said, got up and pulled Wendy who just sat down for a minute. "See you next time, you two!"
Reza laughed seeing Tasya who shot me a knowing wink before the two of them walked away leaving the two of us. As Reza turned their head towards me, I quickly looked down because I was too shy. I felt my face burning, my tongue locked, and my hands got cold. It's not what I'd imagined before. First, I didn't expect that Reza would be this handsome. Second, those two best friends of mine just left me alone with this demi-god.
How could I calm down right now?!
"I remember that I haven't introduced myself to you earlier," I heard him speaking, and again, his voice made me tingle. I slowly turned my head to him, seeing him smiled to me. And I thought my heart almost burst. "I'm Reza."
I shook his stretched hand and I almost cried that his hand was so warm and soft. "Vania," I mentioned my name to him.
"Your hand is cold," he commented, looking at my hand closely as if he wanted to check that my hand was normal, and not was made by ice. After that, he looked around and his eyes found the air-conditioner on the wall near to our table. "Is it cold here?" he asked, and I shook my head--it's always like this whenever I was beyond nervous. "I can ask the waiter to change the temperature if you're cold since I don't bring my jacket with me right now."
I was stunned and my eyes widened. It was my first time to hear a man talked to me like this. I didn't know this kind of act would be considered common or not, but it meant a lot to me. It was our first time meeting and he already paid attention to my cold hands and even offered me some help. And I couldn't help but to stare at him in admiration, while he was holding now both my hands.
"You're not sick, are you?" he asked again, seemed concern and his eyes never left mine.
Again, I shook my head. "No, I'm fine," I squeaked, and I cleared my throat while mentally slapped myself to make such a horrible voice like that. "I'm... " I cleared my throat again, "I'm... I'm nervous, really. I'm sorry."
"Huh? Why are you nervous? And why are you sorry?" he asked, clearly looked and sounded so amused to hear my answer.
I was so shy but I didn't know why his voice--his entire being, to be honest--compelled me to speak more, in a good way. When his thumb gently stroke the back of my hand, I felt much calmer and could think much clearer. And not to mention, that tender smile of his was really something. I just could not take my eyes off of him. If his face was South pole, then mine was North pole.
"Because you want to meet me before tomorrow?" I whispered, then cold sweat running on my back as I heard my own sudden bluntness. And not to mention, I was scared to hear the negative answer from him too. "Because you wanted to call tomorrow off?" but in the end, I just couldn't control myself and blurt that question to him.
He blinked several times (and it looked so cute, actually), looking quite taken aback with my seemingly unpredicted answer. But in a second, he suppressed his laughed and shook his head. And now it's me who was taken aback with his reaction.
"Honestly, I thought you'd answer that you're nervous because of my handsome look or what," he giggled, and I made face to hear that because yes, actually it's one of them too. It must be good for him to have such a handsome face and confidence to speak like that. "But, for my own surprise, your answers were practical and reasonable."
"So...?" I questioned him. Is that true?
"I don't really like surprises now," he confessed, pursed his lips and shrugged, making me exhaled in relieved (WHY?!). "I mean, you probably know that I'd be thirty this year and I just don't feel like it anymore when my parents--especially my mother--suddenly became so full of secret like this. It's someone who might or might not become my fiance and wife that I would meet, why they should keep it as a secret? They've never been like this before."
Okay, thank you for reminding me that you're really thirty years old, I bitterly thought, still couldn't believe the reality that he's thirty. He looked much younger than his actual age, really. But I had to agree that his explanation made sense. His appearance might perfectly hide his age, but his way of thinking completely couldn't fool the surface.
And my stupid-like-a-teenager heart fluttered like a pair of bird's wings when I heard that 'it's someone who might or might not become my fiance and wife that I would meet'. The fiance and wife words apparently were still too much for my poor heart to take, aside from it was a demi-god who said that.
"That's why when I knew my mother was hanging out with yours today, I asked her about you and without being suspicious at all, she answered and even gave me your number. I know that I cheat the start, but I couldn't help it," he continued. "I know that they've been that desperate for me to get married, but still, I'm already thirty or not, I just don't want to be hooked up with some mysterious girl. I really have to make sure with my own eyes before it's started."
"Uhm, you're right," I said, completely agreed with him. "I thought the same thing as you do. I was only told your name, your age, your last education, and your occupation by my parents. They didn't want to show me your picture at all. They just said that it would be surprise."
Reza switched his position, leaned on his side and now facing me. He looked so delighted and I noticed that he was still holding my hands. I just let him be, it felt nice for me to embrace his hands too. "Based on your minimum descriptions from your parents, what did you think of me? What kind of man I was in your thought?"
"Old, boring, bald, and wore a pair of thick glasses," I answered without thinking much, shamelessly stating Wendy's thoughts of him to him instead of mine. Besides, actually I had no imagination about him at all before Wendy stated her own wild imagination. But I was curious, I really wanted to know what kind of reaction that he would show if he was described like that.
He gaped oh-so-widely (and unfairly still looked so handsome) before he laughed out loud. It was amusing to see him laughing like this, although I didn't know why I half wished that he would get pissed off there's someone lowly as me (or Wendy, she's the real culprit) dissed him like that. I was sure that he lived by eating everyone's compliments about his looks. I was so certain.
"Are you sure they're your own words?" he questioned, still in the midst of his laughing that started to calm down. "I think you're too kind to have that kind of imagination of me."
Okay, he got me. And I was flattered that he thought I was too kind to think that way.
"No, they're Wendy's," I decided to be honest, specially when I was kind of sure that he's mature enough to not get offended easily. He's so kind and easy-going, making me glad that his attitude suited well to his handsome face. "You know, she's so unbelievable. You saw her before."
"Yes, I could easily tell that," Reza smiled, and I almost fainted. God, it was the most handsome smile I'd ever seen in his life. "Surprisingly, you seemed different to your friends. Much for my surprise."
Now I was so curious about his thoughts of me. "If you're so surprised, then what's your thought of me before you saw me in person?"
"My mother told me that your name is Vania Larasati, twenty-five years old, and currently taking your Master degree in English Literature. There, I got less information than you did!" he exclaimed, and then grinned from ear to ear. "Purely from your name, it's easy to imagine that you're a feminine and delicate young lady. And since you're still young but your parents seemed so eager to hook you up with me, so I assumed that you're shy too," then his smiled by himself, with cheeks started to blush. "Ah geez, why I become shy like this all of a sudden?"
Meanwhile, I'd been shy from the moment I saw him approximately an hour ago.
He cleared his throat and continued, despite of his blushing face. "But since my parents played that secret trick, I was afraid that you'll be completely different to my imagination and turned out as another typical woman that my parents usually introduced to me before. That's why, I'm this keen to meet you before tomorrow. I need to make sure."
"Another typical woman?" I couldn't help but to ask that part to him.
"Typical impressively majestic and independent lady who doesn't need a man to take care of her," he laughed, and I didn't know where the funny part was. "Okay, sorry for the daddy-lame joke," he apologize right away as soon as he spotted my blank face. "I mean, I'm a man who wants to take care of my woman, Vania. If they're already that independent and think that they don't need a man anymore, why should I? Wouldn't it be pain for both of us in the end?"
I'm a man who wants to take care of my woman, Vania.
I'm a man who wants to take care of my woman, Vania.
I'm a man who wants to take care of my woman, Vania.
"And... then?" I meekly asked, wanting him to continue.
"And then?" he questioned back, titled his head, looked confused to hear my question.
"Andthenwhatdoyouthinkaboutmenow?" I asked in one breath, too embarrassed to say it clearly, but I had to say it.
Smiling, he raised his hands and mine, wiggled them in front of my eyes. "Can't you see that I really want to take care of you so badly, Vania? Even today is only our first meeting?"
Can't you see that I really want to take care of you so badly, Vania?
Can't you see that I really want to take care of you so badly, Vania?
Can't you see that I really want to take care of you so badly, Vania?
Oh my Godness .
Vania Larasati, 25 years old, just died.
***
"VANIAAAAAA~!!!"
My eyes shot opened as soon as I heard my mother's booming sound from living room. People said, mother will be mother no matter time has passed and it was true. Although I already passed thirty since a couple years ago, she always treated me like her little girl. Like this. And not to mention, since she knew where I hid the spare key, crashing into my house in Sunday morning became her brand new hobby.
Before I could get rid of the fluffy blanket, my mother opened the door and I shrieked.
"You're sleeping alone?" she asked.
Seemingly aware that I was too annoyed to even answer at the moment, she just tch-ed and left the door. I knew where she's heading to, so I bolted from the bed to stop him. But too bad, I was a second too late and my mother already opened the room next door.
In front of us, there were Reza sleeping with our kids clutched on his both sides. Kara, our oldest daughter, on his left side and Rega, our younger son, on his right side. To see the mess surrounding the three of them, it's safe to assume that they all fell asleep while playing last night. Saturday night was their playing time, it's not surprising view anymore. At least for me.
I pushed my mother out of the room and shut the door from outside.
"Why are you here?!" I hissed.
"I want to visit my daughter, my son in law, and my grandchildren. Is that wrong?" she asked back, completely thick-skinned as usual.
"Yes, it's wrong when you don't inform us beforehand and make a fuss at six in the morning," I said, rubbed my forehead. "We're family or not, but it's still impolite, Mom."
My mother sighed, but she was still being stubborn to not admit her fault. "Okay, then. I'm gonna make breakfast for all of you. Just sleep and wake up two hours later."
After taking my mother to the kitchen, I went back to the master bedroom and found Reza who was sleeping on the bed. I smiled smugly and threw myself next to him with my back facing him. In a second, he already snuggled behind me.
"I'm sorry that I can't greet your mother yet. I'm still so sleepy," he murmured, half-sleeping. "You can do that to my mother if she come here next time."
I giggled. "Just sleep."
I got married to him five months after that 'cheating start' first meeting, after I'd finished my studies. Four months later, Kara was born. And then two years later, Rega was born. Our life had been beyond busy since then--I was busy taking care of the kids and households, and he was busy working and taking care of the three of us.
In almost seven years getting married to him, it's amazing that I almost never heard him complaining. He's always be the one with bigger heart whenever problems came. With that, I realized that he's not only older by numbers, but also a lot maturer by emotion.
It's not hard for me to love him.
It's not hard for our kids to love him.
And then, I heard commotions from outside. When I stretched my hand, I found it was empty next to me. As I stepped out of the room, I saw Reza, Kara, and Rega sat on the dining room. Reza put bib on Kara and Rega while happily singing their favorite kids' song. Kara and Rega sang and danced at the same time, making their father's smile widened even more.
I couldn't help but to laugh when I suddenly remembered things that he had said to me that time.
I'm a man who wants to take care of my woman, Vania.
Can't you see that I really want to take care of you so badly, Vania?
See? He just didn't change.
Oh, no. He might change a little bit.
Now it became:
I'm a man who wants to take care of my woman and my family, Vania.
Can't you see that I really want to take care of you and our family so badly, Vania?
Yes, that's it.
(Chika Manupada, 2016)
Inspired by: KJM
PS. Sorry for grammatical errors.
PSS. Please, do not piracy! The story plot and characters were mine.
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Hindi marahil naiintindihan pa ng mga tao ang totoo ng ibig-sabihin ng “kaibigan”. Maari nilangsabihin na ang kaibigan ay iyong dumaramay saoras ng kagipitan, o kaya nama`y yaong sumisigabo sa oras ng kadakilaan. Maariri na ang isang kaibigan ay yaong mapagbigay at matulungin lalo na sa pinansiyal na aspeto o maari ring mong nakakasama. O maari naman doon sa hindi pa namumulat sa katotohanan sa mundo ,ang kaibigan ay iyong gagawin ang lahat para sa iyo. Ngunit ,masasabi ba nating alam natin ang lahat? Lahat ng kanilang guni-guni ,nilay-nilay at mga pananaw? Alam ba natin lahat ng kanilang ginagawa`t sinasabi kungtayo`y nakatalikod? Nakasisiguro ba tayo na kaibigan natin sila ,palagi? At kung hindi man sa mga kaibigan, nakasisiguro ba tayo na ang mga tao sa paligid natin ay hindi tayo pinagiisipan ng masama? Walang makatitiyak.
Sa mundo ngayon punung-puno ng kasakiman, kataksilan , at inggit , wala nang maaring mapagkakatiwalaan.Siguro ang ating mga magulang at kapatid, at ang sarili. Ngunit aminin natin na maging tayo`t sila`y nagkakaalitan din. Bakit? Marahil sa inggit, sama ng loob at kadalasa`y katigasan ng ulo at hindi paggalang. Hindi lang saganitong sitwasyo nito maipapamalas ,kundi pati na rin sa kalikasan. Maging ang ating kapaligiran ay hindi sa lahat ng oras ay dumaramay sa atin. Maraming beses tayong sinasagupa ng kapaligiran katulad na lamang ng mga bagyo, lindol, pagsabog ng pagbulkan at marami pang iba. Sa sitwasyon naman ng gobyerno, may mga kaguluhan ring nagaganap. Isa nadito ang mga malawakang demonstrasyon ng mga rallyista at maging sa simpleng magkakaibigan o iyong magkasintahan din, may pag-aaway na nangyayari na nagsasanhi lamang sa tsismis ,inggit , o kaya`y panibugho. Sa ganitong mga halimbawa, masasabi pa ba natin na tayo ay dapat magpakasiguro? Dapat ba tayong magbigay ng tiwala nang ganoon-ganoon lamang? Dapat ba tayong magsiwalat ng ating buhay sa kahit kaninong kaibigan?
Hindi sa lahat ng pagkakataon ,ang ating mga kaibigan ay ating kaibigan. Hindi mali ang pagtitiwala sa isang kaibigan ngunit marapat lamang nakilatisin sila nangmabuti, hindi sa aspetong pinansiyal o pisikal, kundisa personal at moral. Huwagrintayongpakatitiyaksapakikipagrelasyon ,sapagkat dapat nating siguruhin na ang taong ating sasalamuhain sa habambuhay ay karapat-dapat na bigyan ng buong pagtitiwala. Tandaan na walang lugar ang mundo para sa mga taong hindi kritikal sa pagiisip at pamimili sapagkat walang pinapatawad ang mundongito. Maging ang pinakamabait na santo ay nagkaroon rin ng mga kaalitan. Ang kinakailangan ng mundong ito ay yaong taong marunong sa takbo ng buhay. Isa ka ba doon?
She fought against it. Clawing her arms to grasp on something. Anything to pull herself up.
But all she was grabbing was nothing. Her body was sinking deeper and deeper into the cold blue void.
No! No! No!
Was she stuck? Iria veered down to find what was dragging her. The broken piece of metal was indeed right behind her, a part of it yanking at her clothing.
Her gun holster? Her coat? She desperately searched for the tangle, yanking harder and harder but in vain.
Her lungs were screaming for air and her head pounded from the ocean's pressure.
In other words, she was going to die.
Drown in the sea. Truthfully, it sounded a lot better than dying to the virus.
But to die now...the thought terrifyingly made Iria struggle even more as the iciness was sucking her energy out of her muscles.
No, she couldn't die right there, right now.
She had too many things to resolve. Too much at stake.
So much to do. So many broken promises to repair and keep.
She still hadn't assured that those kids were off the island, away from the unleashed nightmare...
"You really should cease your naivety." The memory of that shmuck, cruel smile on Wesker's face flashed in her mind. "You can't save everyone."
She hadn't even given him a bullet with his name on it yet...
The scientist had always been teased that she had half the luck of an Irish. It was a running gag among her closest colleagues before the outbreak and one she didn't hold too much of a grudge.
Sadly, it seemed to have run out.
All of her sins have eventually outweighed it.
I'm sorry...
The freezing cold urged her to give up, which she obliged.
This was her punishment. The eleven years of her mistakes had finally caught up to her.
I'm so sorry...
With her fighting spirit ceasing its revolt, she let herself descend deeper into the abyss.
Into regret...
Then something gripped her feeble hand.
Her body was pulled up, the very hand grasping tightly for dear life on whatever it was. At the near brink of losing consciousness from lack of oxygen, Iria glanced up at her rescuer, who glared back at her with furious blue eyes.
Claire had quickly untangled her off the wreckage.