all the rights that come with marriage you should be able to have without marriage btw. you should be able to designate a person who can visit you in the hospital regardless of your relationship to that person.

i'm getting the sense some of you are not actually forklift certified.

well damn . egg on my face

Update: I took a certification class in shipboard Material Handling Equipment at my federal job. *now* I'm forklift certified, but only on ships and piers and only for this company, but also rated to forklift explosives and hazardous materials. Also I'm a woman now.

It was a clitorical question

My job? I’m the bat enemy in 2D games that flies at you from a diagonal angle you can’t shoot in, it’s an under appreciated role but really serves to test the player’s understanding of the mechanics leading up to harder challenges. I also receive an intense smug satisfaction when they can’t hit me.

i love paintings that look as if they have ghosts in them

You can make a movie with where the only white character is a man named Ray Cism whose one line of his 16 seconds of screen time is “I seriously hate women and minorities.” and you’ll find fifty bajillion reader x Ray Cism fanfics and renaissance style drawings of him with a halo of golden light

clearly some of you have not been to the labyrinth of pestilence deep beneath kentucky

alright so when I was a teenager I went to this bug-themed summer camp for socially stunted nerds and on the way back from it I visited the university of kentucky. I met with an entomologist there and while we were touring the department he asked "wanna see something cool?" so he took me down an elevator to what must've been a sub-sub-sub basement on a card-access only floor, and after turning several more corners we went through two sets of (I'm not even exaggerating) 12-inch thick doors, opening onto one long as fuck corridor. each side of this hallway was lined with about 50 refrigerators. and each and every single one of these refrigerators was filled with hundreds of thousands. of live. bedbugs. the very reasonable explanation for this was that they were doing research on insecticides and needed to test them on real samples, but they could not under any circumstances allow them to escape, so they had to be kept under area 51 levels of overkill containment. but reasonable or not that was very much not what I anticipated seeing that day. so yeah. I decided after that I did not want to become an entomologist

absolutely baffled to get to the end of that story and hear you decide NOT to be an entomologist but possibly that's the entomologist in me speaking

as this breaches containment it is vital to me that The People know my problem with the bedbug labyrinth was NOT the bedbugs. that was obviously sick as fuck. the problem was it dawning on me how much entomology research is anti-bug instead of pro bug. weird girl equivalent of realizing how much time veterinarians spend putting down dogs

That bug isn't digging, it's playing a kazoo

The fact that after the United States the countries with most mormons are Mexico, Brazil, Philippines, Peru and Chile makes me want to scream. Kill all missionaries now.