distressing things to say to your friends

Andulka
sheepfilms

bliss lane
Interview Vampire Daily

blake kathryn

ellievsbear
he wasn't even looking at me and he found me

shark vs the universe
EXPECTATIONS
Lint Roller? I Barely Know Her

romaβ
"I'm Dorothy Gale from Kansas"
π
Not today Justin
macklin celebrini has autism

Product Placement

#extradirty
Cosmic Funnies

titsay
seen from United States

seen from Argentina
seen from Brazil
seen from Uruguay
seen from United Kingdom

seen from United States

seen from United States
seen from Russia

seen from Singapore
seen from Singapore
seen from Bolivia

seen from Singapore
seen from United States

seen from Singapore
seen from United States
seen from Pakistan

seen from Canada
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seen from India
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@sweetinfluencerenthusiast
distressing things to say to your friends

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When medicine is holding the migraine back but you can still kinda feel it in the distance waiting to return
Man notices an Eagle eyeing the fish he just caught
*gets back to the nest* baby you are NEVER gonna believe how i got this fish
I just found out the offspring of a goat and sheep is called a GEEP and theyβre the cutest lil shits ever I want 200 of them
A baby
VS an adult
Coool as fuck they have two sets of horns
Goats are associated with Satan and lambs are associated with God.
We have created the official half demon/angel and Iβm very pleased
Limbo is just filled with these. Purgoatory if you will.
Lambo

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Strawberry Chocolate Cake
Cinnamon Roll Croissants
Blood Orange Cake
i promise: however big you think this wave will be, it is bigger
That wasnβt a joke. I aimed my estimate high and then added some.
The wave was bigger.
I like to imagine that, thousands of years ago, humans still stood a (reasonably) safe distance from the ocean during weather like this to watch the waves, hooting and cheering when the spray came closer than expected and left them drenched

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βscientists donβt want you knowβ is a phrase that always cracks me up because if you actually meet a scientist they will be shaking and crying like an overstimulated chihuahua with the need to let you know
zuko and katara attempt to soft parent the gaang (and fail)
Metahuman with super healing powers whose entire job is that once a week they go to a nearby hospital and are put into a medically induced coma for 24 hours while all their organs and blood are harvested, and kept there until they've healed up again.
They get paid a small stipend by the Heroes Council for this, and they live off that.
No crime fighting, no obvious heroics, and they only took a Super Identity because it's technically hero's council policy. Nobody's ever seen them in a cape.
Every so often the Heroes council will release an official report to the public, and there'll be another bunch of news articles wondering how some unknown super calling themselves 'Meat Factory' somehow consistently holds the record for most lives saved across the city.
It is essential to my vision that they are not at all sanctimonious about this.
Like, they regularly act like they're getting away with something. They joke about how they get to earn money in their sleep. They show up to their hospital visits in deliberately ridiculous disguises, on the excuse that they need to 'protect their identity'.
Part of their employment contract is that they get served the same post-operation vanilla ice cream that they normally hand out on the childrens' ward. Also a sticker. Their overnight bag is covered in stickers.
Okay, Meat Factory is awesome and hilarious, but if they're being harvested for and regenerating absolutely everything, may I suggest an alternative super name: Theseus.
ππ‘πͺπ¦π―π¦π«π€ ππ’ππ²π±πΆ

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Spring is here
Rest your mind tonight.