i love the way you take up space

the hardest part isn't even the being alone - it is that i know i have all this love fossilizing in me, a pearl. a plum stone. it's that i want to find someone to fissure it out into; my palm an open cup.

I haven’t been very impressed lately. By people, or places, or the way someone said he loved me and then slowly changed his mind.

Someone can be madly in love with you and still not be ready. They can love you in a way you have never been loved and still not join you on the bridge. And whatever their reasons you must leave. Because you never ever have to inspire anyone to meet you on the bridge. You never ever have to convince someone to do the work to be ready. There is more extraordinary love, more love that you have never seen, out here in this wide and wild universe. And there is the love that will be ready.

Do you believe me if I say I only ever wanted to be worthy of my father’s grief? Of the kind of obsession that nearly drowns us?

When we slow, the garden can choose what we notice. Can change our heart.

Deeper, deeper down where a woman’s heart is holding its breath, where something very far away in that body is becoming something we don’t have a name for.

Journeys end in lovers meeting; I have spent an all but sleepless night, I have told lies and made a fool of myself, and the very air tastes like wine. I have been frightened half out of my foolish wits, but I have somehow earned this joy; I have been waiting for it for so long.