there are two wolves inside of you. one is sobbing because they’re excited to get their mess of a little babygirl lawyer back. the other doesn’t want disney anywhere near matthew murdock.

having a job is very weird bcos by and large your coworkers will be a variety of ages and you will not all be at the same stage of life. your coworker will be like, well I’m off home to spend time with my husband & child, what are you going to do with your evening? and you’re like, well, I plan on playing Rollercoaster Tycoon for as much as it as possible

"he's evil" no he's not. he's just my lil man. ok, maybe a little, but he's still just my funky lil man. "he's killed people" okay, and?? he's just quirky that's all. but he's also got great style, and i think he'd give really good hugs :)

the last guy's blood didn't splatter across my face and shirt sexily or aesthetically enough so i have to kill again. sorry.

I may be an absolute disaster of an adult but when someone younger than me asks for advice I turn into a Wise Professor

time to online shop

sure hope my bank account won’t get charged like last time

by talos this can’t be happening

my toxic trait is never tracking my periods so every 28 days i gaslight myself into thinking the world is ending when the pms symptoms hit me like a freight train