ghost always heard the other recruits complain about how hard it is to please their girls, how difficult they are, and all the other locker room talk. so he figures most of it is bitching but with a kernel of truth in there somewhere, and he’s glad he isn’t dealing with something like that on top of everything. but then he gets his girl and all he can do is scratch his head when he hears it. it’s all just observation and application, innit? like field work but way easier— no guns, no deaths, no mess. his girl has a favorite food, a favorite flower, a favorite kind of little trinket, and it makes her happy when he brings them to her. he keeps a calendar of all the dates she tells him about, like any good soldier would, to plan around or for them. he figures no girl wants to be worrying about her car, so he takes it to the shop and fills it with gas when he can, drives her everywhere while he’s with her. he doesn’t mind wherever they go, but she does so he picks the places and the things she likes and gets rewarded when they get home. her hips buck when he flicks his tongue or curls his fingers a certain way? noted and catalogued for future reference.
and somehow everything he does is right and gets him kisses all over his face, one happy girl calling him “sweet” of all things. this shit is easy and the rest of those muppets don’t deserve their girls.
