this will be rambly and disjointed
I did enjoy the episode. some amazing, surprising, very touching scenes. the writing and the acting did a lot with very little time. I dislike the way the episode was structured, though. I can see that gadd wanted some things to happen (niall and alby to meet, niall to have a reason to go ahead and come out) and then wrote their reasons into being, but the sauna plot felt like a filler. I don't think we had the time to spare for it
phenomenal acting by rgadd. everybody was great, but the way he taps into pain is mesmerizing. it would be easy to be swallowed by bell, but gadd gave him no ground. they both deserve all the awards they'll certainly be winning
I don't actually believe ruben when he says that niall's sexuality has nothing to do with him, or that he wouldn't have cared. I wrote a little bit about it here
I also couldn't shake the suspicion that ruben was digging - the way he kept repeating "now you. now you. now you." until niall did eventually spill the beans
that's not to say I didn't think he was being honest, but ruben isn't just a brute: he's a bit of an ambush hunter. gadd said so himself in interviews. and it's just like him to expose a raw bleeding wound and then leverage it to his advantage, because that's also just like niall. niall mimics ruben's rage and intimidation tactics and ruben mimics niall's cold cunning
I think that what frustrated me about this episode, and also episode 5 to an extent, is the wonky pacing. it sticks out like a sore thumb to me here because it's the finale, and every scene that wasn't tight just made me think "we could be watching niall and ruben instead of this"
but I do keep in mind that while this isn't exactly gadd's debut, it's his first time writing something that's both entirely fictional and also original. netflix's baby reindeer had the privilege of being based on a real story he could draw from, and lean on two already existing shows (its namesake and monkey see monkey do)
I did like the ending. the murder scene is very much also a rape scene. ironically, it felt like one of their most tender moments. there's this split second, after ruben is done, where he looks down at the length of niall's body with his kilt tucked up, and for a moment you can see "did you come, baby?" written all over his face