我实在没有说过这样一句话 @stumpyjoepete - Tumblr Blog

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stumpyjoepete

why is my cat like this

stumpyjoepete

he came back and fell asleep

#carlos the cat

why is my cat like this

#carlos the cat

shabbytigers

stumpyjoepete

This was an actual response to Danielle Rose pointing out that the average person doesn't read poetry, which went over like a lead balloon in the poetry community.

#don't read the comments #the discourse tm

stumpyjoepete

What is the difference between a resistive and an inductive load? Well, if my apartment lights flicker when it kicks on, it's inductive.

stumpyjoepete

A thunder storm knocked out half of the outlets in my apartment. Not all of them. Half of them. Flipped the breakers, no dice. Super says power company is working on it, lots of people affected.

Literally how is this building wired.

#new amsterdam

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THE ALGORITHM: I see you enjoy being mad.

ME: Actually no, I hate that. (Furiously liking all the dunks in the replies)

THE ALGORITHM: Ok here's more infuriating bullshit!

ME: 😡

vs

THE ALGORITHM: I see you enjoy toddlers saying the darndest things.

ME: Yes

THE ALGORITHM: This kid is inconsolable because he found out that butterflies don't have skeletons.

ME: 😭

#the only content from twitter that actually improves my life

Disappointed to learn that the Shi'ur Qomah literature skips over YHWH's dick measurements.

But going from height... if his balls were in the center of the solar system, it would maybe reach past Jupiter? Or if you go with a different height estimate, maybe three times as far out as the heliopause?

But the recension with the larger estimate gives him a 1:1000 finger to height ratio, which might imply him still having a micropenis that only goes out to Jupiter anyway.

#what kind of idiot makes a uranus you can't fuck #???#religion #i guess

We got all kinds of -nesias. Small, black, Indian, happy, and a lot.

#micro mela indo macaron and poly #yes macaron

what's this? gomen?

no need to apologize, this ethiopian food looks great.

well what about this? shiro?

no, i mean the orange one

#trying to explain what I cooked for dinner #but unfortunately i've been teleported into a japanese who's on first gag #民以食为天 #big in japan

stumpyjoepete

Just learned the word "pluvial", and it's in the context of flooding, where it is always immediately alongside and to be distinguished from "fluvial".

Couldn't they have picked a word that doesn't seem like a typo of the other one?

nicdevera

years ago "pluviophile" was hugely popular in dating profiles

stumpyjoepete

seeking: piñacoladavore and pluviophile

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Just learned the word "pluvial", and it's in the context of flooding, where it is always immediately alongside and to be distinguished from "fluvial".

Couldn't they have picked a word that doesn't seem like a typo of the other one?

#language #totally different etyma too

Trying to convince my wife to make this required reading for her students:

Did you think I wouldn’t be able to tell? I can tell.

#sam kriss as krampus for college kids #im not saying *i* will do this but *he* might #ai

new wurtz dropped

#musicas #Youtube

femmenietzsche

I wonder if Obama ever thinks to himself Damn practicing talking in front of the mirror sure paid off huh

stumpyjoepete

buffing the mirror after getting out of the shower: let me be clear

#don't read the comments

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#musicas #carole king esque #Youtube

#nightmare: the destroyer #good name for a penis #religion #language #or whatever

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我实在没有说过这样一句话