Up jumped The Scarecrow

unsurviving version

hello. my name is [name]. you killed my father. prepare to die.

give us the gate key.

as you wish.

who are you? are we enemies?

i've always been a quick healer.

good night. good work. sleep well. i'll most likely kill you in the morning.

get back, witch.

i'll try to stay awake.

it's not that bad.

you are wonderful.

i admit it, you are better than i am.

why are you smiling?

i've seen worse.

i told you i would always come for you. why didn't you wait for me?

death cannot stop true love. all it can do is delay it for a while.

i will never doubt again.

i could kill you now.

maybe you could come over and read it again to me tomorrow.

life is pain. anyone who says differently is selling someone.

you have a great gift for rhyme.

anybody want a peanut?

who are you?

get used to disappointment.

i don't suppose you could speed things up?

if you're in such a hurry, you could lower a rope or a tree branch or find something useful to do.

i do not think you would accept my help, since i am only waiting around to kill you.

that does put a damper on our relationship.

i promise i will not kill you until you reach the top.

that's very comforting, but i'm afraid you'll just have to wait.

i hate waiting.

isn't there any way you trust me?

throw me the rope.

we'll never survive. we may as well die here.

we have already succeeded.

i don't think they exist.

you've done nothing but study swordplay?

there's not a lot of money in revenge.

i certainly hope you find him someday.

you seem a decent fellow. i hate to kill you.

where is the poison?

i am not a great fool.

you've made your decision then?

you're just stalling now.

you'd like to think that, wouldn't you?

you're trying to trick me into giving away something. it won't work.

i know where the poison is!

then make your choice.

i am no one to be trifled with.

kill me quickly.

i would sooner destroy a stained glass window than an artist like yourself.

you got any money?

are you a rotten liar!

your first story was better.

do you always begin conversations this way?

you mean you wish to surrender to me? very well. i accept.

i don't think i'm quite familiar with that phrase.

drop your sword.

tear his arms off.

we'll never survive.

nonsense. you're only saying that because no one ever has.

he didn't fall? inconcievable!

you keep using that word. i do not think it means what you think it means.

i can't compete with you physically, and you're no match for my brains.

you're that smart?

let me put it this way. have you heard of plato, aristotle, socrates? morons.

why do you wear a mask?

were you burned by acid, or something like that?

i think everyone will be wearing them in the future.

you know, it's very strange.

i have been in the revenge business so long, now that it's over, i don't know what to do with the rest of my life.

❝ what's your favorite color and why? ❞

❝ can i come with you? ❞

❝ you have a nice smile, has anyone ever told you that before? ❞

❝ how do you take your coffee? ❞

❝ sorry, what was your name again? ❞

❝ it just occurred to me i never asked you what your last name is. ❞

❝ actually we've met before. ❞

❝ i've heard a few things about you. ❞

❝ care to join me? ❞

❝ i'm not really sure why i trust you. ❞

❝ i don't usually talk this much, it just feels easy to say stuff when you're listening. ❞

❝ i know we don't know each other that well but if you wanna talk about it... ❞

❝ could you help me with something? ❞

❝ do you like it here? ❞

❝ are you new around here? ❞

❝ you can ask me anything you want. i promise i'll answer truthfully except the things i feel like lying about. ❞

❝ i don't mean to be too forward, you just seem like you could use a friend right now. ❞

❝ you can come with me. i mean if you don't have anyone waiting for you. ❞

❝ we're friends now. you can ask me for help. ❞

❝ do you like this music? i can change it. ❞

❝ what are your favorite snacks? ❞

❝ really? i wouldn't have guessed that about you. ❞

❝ do you mind if i ask about it? ❞

ACTIONS:

VISIT: for sender to go to receiver's home for the first time

VISITED: for receiver to go to sender's home for the first time

CRYING: for sender to see receiver cry for the first time

CRIED: for receiver to see sender cry for the first time

BEGIN: sender and receiver are on their first date together

TRIP: our muses go on a group trip but end up stuck together, away from the rest of their friends.

SITUATION: our muses are acquainted because one of them is their friend's roommate. muse a shows up when their friend isn't there and ends up hanging out with muse b one on one.

GO: our muses go to a zoo or theme park together and get lost.

INVITE: sender cooks for receiver for the first time

INVITED: receiver cooks for sender for the first time

TOGETHER: our muses spend the night for the first time

TRY: our muses hooked up and are hanging out the next day

COMFORT: sender is going through a break up and receiver offers to cheer them up

COMFORTED: receiver is going through a break up and sender offers to cheer them up

OFFER: sender gives receiver a ride to the airport/picks them up

OFERED: receiver gives sender a ride to the airport/picks them up

AID: sender helps receiver redecorate

Charles F. Tunnicliffe (1901–1979), “The Oddmeddod”, wood engraving, 1933

In the Big Wheatfield, an ‘expanse of harrowed clods and flints’, stood the scarecrow Oddmedodd. Dressed in a ‘broken bowler, a ragged tarpaulin, and split trousers’ it ‘barred the fox’s way with open arms’.

‘It had a whitey-green face fixed in a ghastly grin. A clay pipe was in its mouth. Its head was sprouting through the the crown of its hat in a thick yellow green curl. Its only companion hung upside down beside it, tied by a leg to a stick. Like itself, this companion was eyeless, It was a dead rook beside the scarecrow.’