I try

damn, she’s a bad bitch. oh they’re nonbinary? my bad. damn, they’re a bad person

minute rice? forsooth. twould be far stranger if the rice were not minute, but rather enormous

the problem with buying food is after you eat it you have to go buy more food

just say you have an addiction

as a little baby you are happy with plain milk and just some sort of mono-coloured paste, but as you eat more and more that just doesn't cut it any more. you need more flavours, more textures, more extreme foods. that's how you can tell it's not harmless, it's frying your dopamine receptors. some sickos even eat foods that literally hurt to eat because they're so eager to chase their fix.

I need straight people to shut the fuck up about chappell roan. I'm tired. "She's not using her platform" she was raising money for gaza at concerts with her friendship bracelets. "She's using the queer community" bitch she's a lesbian drag queen she IS the community. "She's so entitled now" she literally just won a Grammy and used that speech advocating for living wages and healthcare for all artists. What the fuck are you doing? Other than tone policing people actually putting the work in?

"dont smoke around your pets" okay well i dont even smoke im asthmatic. my dog smokes bc she needs to fucking chill sometimes and Yeah i light them for her Obviously bc she cant use a lighter. i dont get anyrhing out of this arrangment and i resent the implication. in fact shes giving ME secondhand smoke. so my question is why are you so hateful and jugemental and acting like an asshole to me making presumptions and shit about my life.

Daily fucking reminder that Luigi Mangione is innocent, completely and fully. He has been convicted of no crime. He has had no fair trial. He is a SUSPECT. Luigi Mangione is entirely innocent and everyone needs to stop parroting this insidious propaganda that he “committed” the crime he is only SUSPECTED of. He is not a murderer. He is not a criminal. He is an innocent man.

Put this out about Luigi Mangione.

I love personalization. I love stickers on water bottles and on laptops. I love shitty marker drawing on the toes of converse. I love hand embroidered doodles on jeans. I love posters on walls. I love knick knacks on shelves. I love jewelry with goofy charms. I love when people take things and make them theirs.