me

it’s so beautiful when you start to do something that makes you completely forget about food, calories and workouts. today i went biking with my family around the city and i had so much fun with them after years!! i forgot about all the things i had to eat ( i am on a holiday with them so i eat with them) and the fact that i can’t workout like i always do everyday.

I really enjoy writing on this blog because i can exercise my english even if i make mistakes. I’m always happy when people respond me and share with me their thoughts because i think that i am not the only one who feel auful and have a bad relation with food. 

You know when you plan all your day and ther arrives someone who can fuck all of them? Like today: eat more only because after I wanted to go for a run, then it started raining so i had to stay home for dinner. I didin’t want to eat because I wasn’t hungry but then my mother started to talking about racism (she is very racist and against black people) and I got angry and started to discuss. I have a very hard relation with her and food so i started to eat aggresivly only because I was angry with all that she was saying. I tend to eat when i’m nervous, angry or emotional and after that i feel guity. So now my night is fucked up.

Tomorrow I go out for dinner with my friends so i’m planning to not eat during the day, or eat only a little bit so i can do a  workout 

I hope that i didn’t do so much errors 

...do you handle birthdays? you know, when you are invited to a party, where ther is a dinner and you have to eat. Then, they order, at the restaurant a dessert, so do you, because you don’t want to be the only who don’t eat. 

Or when your parents invite some friends for lunch/dinner so you have to sit at the table with them. What do you do? Because i always end with a binge because i’m angry, nevous and the day is altready ruined. I don’t know how to act